A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I think our friends daughter- who is 9 is stealing from us and I'm not sure the best way to deal with it...Over the year I have noticed that after they visit, small things go missing fromour house. At the beginning of the year I noticed that some of my button collection that I have in the hallway went missing - I didn't think much of it and then an ornament went missing from the conservatory-both of this happened when they visited. Abut 2 months ago she needed to use our toilet - I said she could use our main bathroom. She'd was gone quite awhile do when I went up to check on her she was coming out of our ensuite . I asked why she used that toilet (I wasn't happy she went in our bedroom) and she said she thought that's the toilet I told her to use. That evening when they left I noticed 1 of my miniature perfumes that I had on my bedside table had gone. I knew I definetly had it that morning as I dusted the area. I asked my husband if he had moved it but he didn't touch it. I looked everywhere so I can only assume their child took it as only my husband and I live there.Then yesterday afternoon they called to say they were coming to drop of our Christmas presents. We didn't have any cakes or biscuits on so my husband went to the shop to get some. When he arrived he put the change which consisted of a £5 notes and some pennies on the side of the breakfast bar.They arrived and stayed awhile and when they left my husband went to get his change but the £5 note was missing... I didn't take it... I do however remember their child going in there to use our fridge as we have an ice dispenser she likes using.Unfortunately the child is very spoilt and her parents take her word over anyone's every time. There have been incidents on the past where she has denied doing things when others have had proof she did yet her parents blame others.I don't want to lose our friendship because we have known each other for years and they are good people but on the other hand I don't want to feel like I have to follow their child around constantly when they are here....Has anyone else been in this situation? If so, how did you deal with it? Thanks.
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (24 December 2013):
 OP, I don't know if you're low on friends at the moment and this is a case of beggars can't be chooses, but good people do not behave this way, nor do they allow their children to. You're making the same allowances for them that they make for their daughter.I think the best thing, and really the only thing, you can do to protect yourself from this family's predations is to cut them out of your lives. No fanfare, no drama, no discussions (which haven't worked for anyone else). Just no more contact. If it helps, you can gradually fall off the map instead of abruptly cutting them loose. Follow through with whatever Christmas plans you have (hide away any valuables if you decide to have them over again or come up with a polite change of plans). Then stop contacting them and take longer and longer to respond when they contact you, and be too busy to get together.The apple does not fall far from the tree. They are not good people and they're certainly not good friends.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (24 December 2013):
 I agree with blonde30s - don't have them in your home again if you can avoid it.
They won't believe or or they already know and are ignoring it.
Visit them, go to their home (if the kid is with them) and if they do not have her with them THEN they can come visit.
I would be furious, it's not so much that it's little things and it's not that she takes them because she needs them, she takes them because she CAN and because she KNOWS her parents rather deny it then face the fact that their child is a pilfering little girl.
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