A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I think I am depressed..I get upset over the littlest things, always crying about anything n everything... when I get upset I either eat loads(and I have gained loads weight) or eat nothing (terrible stretch marks from putting weight on n off) I feel shit all the time about myself. I think I am absolutely UGLY! N I am like this months... past few weeks I have even lost interest in sex which I love I don’t know what to do... I also feel so tired pretty much All the time ...I haven’t said nothing to any one apart from my boyfriend (today) who is trying his best to talk to me but its not working...I really just want to get back to my old self and need help terribly please...Help soon --- I feel so Miserable!! x x x
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male
reader, rcn  +, writes (30 September 2007):
 I still recommend seeing a doctor. The reason it's important, depression is not a disorder where you take two aspirin and call me in the morning. It's an actual off balance within your neurotransmitters.
Here is a site I found for you. It's a self help, and they offer many reports, changes that can be made, etc. I hope this helps you. http://www.stressgroup.com/depression.html
Take care of yourself. If it does get worse, or your symptoms increase, tell your parents. It's important to take control and start living now than later.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionheyas, tanx for all yer posts after. today feeling much better all due to my boyfriend, but cant let him be under stress tryin keep me happy all day. Ive decided to start swimming as an activity to keep me goin and to stick to healthy foods.
I dont drink only on occasion(xmas, new years etc) but even at dat very rare.
im defo not pregnant as i had my las period witch was recent.
i am on the pill .. would dis caz any thing wi my case?
i was thinkin dat today?
I noticed all yer answers say see the doctors bu i dont want to tell my mam or dad bout it incase they think im over reacting? or sum tin? plus i dont have de med card to see my doc for free and dont have the money to go..
do any u no any websites i can go o which wud b even lik a doc to help me?
wb wen ever yas can tanx very much! xxxx
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A
female
reader, bemused  +, writes (29 September 2007):
 Hi hun. There is solid advice in the other posts here.Think about it and heed it. There is a saying that depression is called the common cold of mental illness. It has touched most of us at one time or another. Life has its ups and downs and at your age...paticularly. I strongly suggest a trip to your doctor...pronto..do not let this go. She may perscribe an anti depressant for you and may send you to the lab to determine if your depression is chemically based. From the sound of your post it sounds like this is not your general mental outlook but has come on recently. Could you be pregnant..just wondering. In addition to getting medical help and possibly counselling list the things you enjoy and make time for them. Try not to block out the people in your life who care...if they are stepping up and are concerned they are real friend. Good luck hun
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A
female
reader, Lilli b  +, writes (29 September 2007):
 See someone and soon. Depression is serious but can be sorted. Has something happened to trigger these feelings? If so this could be something called reactive depression and can be cleared up quite quickly possibly with medication. There are other forms of depression including clinical depression which is where there is a chemical imbalance in your brain that leads to feelings of depression (reactive depression can lead to chemical). It is worth talking to a decent doctor to discuss how you feel and explore options - remember you do have OPTIONS - there are lots of routes to help you so don't be pushed into doing anything you are uncomfortable about. And medication should never be a long term solution only short term.
There are other things you can do instead of medication including counselling, homeopathic approaches or other alternative medicines or lifestyle changes - look at your diet - what are you eating? Do you drink alcohol as this can contribute hugely to feelings of depression particuarly in excess?
Also exercise - depression can lead to feeling like you have no energy and being tired all the time but if you can do even a little bit of exercise preferably in the open air - brisk walking or cycling for instance - it would help as the act of exercising produces seratonin which is what is lacking when you are depressed.
There is a natural remedy called St. Johns Wort that has some of the same properties as some of the prescribed medications but with less side affects (although this can affect birth control pills so be careful with that if this is your choice of contraception)
Try and see a doctor and one that you are happy with - if the first isn't right, choose another. I do think it would be worth asking the doctor if you can be referred for some kind of counselling as I think counselling is essential to help you get to the bottom of your feelings of ugliness. I can tell you here and now, you are not ugly - you will probably remember that before this time you didn't feel ugly so remember that this is a symptom of what you are going through. Your excessive eating and then starving leading to weight gain and stretch marks is possibly an unconscious effort to match your outside appearance with your inner feelings - and also an attempt to control your feelings of ugliness in a way you know how - it is far easier to gain and lose weight than it is to address the inner feelings. Talk to someone - you need to be working on the root of your feelings and understand why your self esteem as dipped to the level it has and start working on building it back up
I can't tell you how long this will last as this is different for everyone but you have started well by talking to your boyfriend and posting your question here. Now take it further and see someone who will be able to help you fully - don't leave it up to your boyfriend as it will be very difficult for him to understand and know how to help. Once you start to take control by talking to a doctor and counsellor you will start to feel better.
Your sexual desire will return but not until you do something about your feelings. Try reading (there are masses of resources on the internet and books you can get) to help you understand but remember that depression is probably unique for everyone.
Good luck and take care and get in touch to let me know how you are getting on.
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A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (29 September 2007):
Sounds like you may have depression. You need to do a lot mor exercise. Avoid stress by meditation, watch comedy movie and reading books. Also a visit to a Physciahatrist would be heplful.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (29 September 2007):
Do you have ability to see a psychologist there? Before answering your question, I took a few moments to look up and cross match your symptoms against a mental health book. Your symptoms are a match to "Major Depressive Disorder". It really isn't your fault this happened and many times it just takes form without an actual cause on your end.
We give advice to a lot of people, but knowing this disorder, you need to make yourself a promise and see a psychologist, or counselor.
I use to tell people that people with depression just needed to think positive, until I ended up with it myself. For me 20 mg of Lexapro medication helps me to live life, and be happy about what I do. Meds may work for you too, but there not a permanent solution. Temporary until you've replaced that feeling with the progress of other treatment.
Now don't get scared. There is one more treatment that has a 100% success rate with no side affects. It sounds scary but if it works... ECT, electro convulsive treatment. I only recommend that one because it works.
Take care
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