A
female
age
30-35,
*othorien10
writes:I saw my mate's boyfriend, kissing another one of my friends in the park the other day. They both saw me but carried on anyway, a few hours later they knocked on my door and begged me not to tell my mate.I'm confused, as i don't want to be the girl to break up a relationship of 3 years, and my mate seems really happy with her boyfriend but dont you think he deserves to know?
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female
reader, Lothorien10 +, writes (17 November 2010):
Lothorien10 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks a lot for the advice guys, I think I'm going to tell him to tell my friend or I will. Being in the middle of the situation makes me feel really uncomfortable but the only way to get out of it is to resolve it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): TeLl him he has a day to tell her, or else u will.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): the truth shall set you free
just tell your friend about the cheating stuff in a nice manner
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 I just want to add in that if you do end up telling her chances are great she will at first be upset with you. The classic "shooting the messenger". However, as reality dawns upon her she will be grateful you came forth. A true friendship can stand the blast of her first reaction, just don't take it to heart. If she gets upset it's not at you, but at the situation she has found herself in. It is very painful to get cheated on. So embrace for impact and stand ready to lend her a shoulder to cry on after the dust has settled.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Ouch caught in the middle..you don't want to be the one to tell her, because what if she doesn't believe you or her boyfriend denies the allegations. Or if you don't tell her, then this secret is weighing down on you, and if the roles were switched wouldn't you want to now? Lastly, what if she somehow finds out and then gets pissed at you for not telling you in the first place! Risks all the way around. So what's the best possible way, it looks better coming out of his mouth..I like what chigirl said, tell him either he tells her or you will do it yourself.
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A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (17 November 2010):
 chigirl's advice is spot on. Tell him either he tells or you tell. Unfortunately, it's not exactly your place to tell her the he's cheating on her... but this is a way to work around that.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): You'd be a great friend to approach her and just say hey I respect your relationship greatly and have always wished you two the best. I just wanted to bring something to your attention that I just so happened to see in plain view...and then explain. If she's mature, she will be happy you came forth. You simply care, you wouldnt be breaking up anything. You see something that is off character and arguably immoral thus youre bringing to the attention to those you care about. Good luck. I know rough spot :/
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (17 November 2010):
You would not be the one who break up a 3 year long relationship. The cheating and lying boyfriend is the one who has ended the relationship, due to his CHEATING. It's not your fault that he does what he does.
Tell the guy you will give him a week to tell your friend. If not, then you will tell her yourself. If he tells her, then you don't have to tell her you already know.
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