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female
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Chelsea
writes:I need help, asap. The thing is, I look really young for my age. I'm 19, 20 in November and I still get asked for ID. Most of the time I even get asked ID for a 15 rated movie. When I got to clubs it's really embarrassing to be stopped infront of people. Is there any way I make myself look older? Thanks x
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2008): Oh, my gosh, I'm so with you. I'm 20 years old, will be 21 in April, and people think I'm 16 or 17 years old. I get it all the time.
I'd say just don't worry about it. I mean, we might change more slowly than other people, but eventually we'll start to look mature.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008): I know exactly how you feel. I'm 19 and look about 14/15. I've been hearing from people that I look young for my age since I was about 13. When I went off to college last year, it was absolutely painful. I heard it so much there, it made me want to drop out, and I did. Within a couple months I was back home and going to community college. I figured I would go to school at home for a couple years and then transfer, hopefully this would give me a little time to mature physically. Well, my time here is almost up, and my appearance has not changed at all. But I never give up hope that maybe one day it will all change. Listen, don't bother trying to explain to others how painful it can be sometimes, because unless they've lived it, they will never understand. Don't change who you are, and never give up.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2008): tell me about it, im 17, i look freaking 12! i havnt got the confidence to learn to drive or do other things that people do my age.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2008): Im 20.....look about 15.....it sucks. people are so rude. its amazing how people are so quick to point something out like how someone is young looking, but its considered wrong to go up to someone and call them fat or ugly.
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female
reader, HintOfTheCentury  +, writes (22 September 2008):
I know EXACTLY what you mean... and im so so glad that im not the only one out there with this problem.
i turned 16 this year but i only look 14 at the most. the other day my friend told me that i looked 12. it just makes me SO angry when people say that you should be grateful for looking young, because they have NO IDEA how frustrating it can be at times! im sure that my little sister will soon be looking older than me, which is the ultimate punishment... it seems that everything about me looks young. im short, have a small face, am almost flat chested (which is a problem in itself)and low self-esteem because of all this, which only makes me appear younger, im sure. i KNOW that i wont get into clubs without having to show ID all the time. even then, theyll probably think its fake. i dont know...life is unfair
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2008): I'm 21 years old, about to turn 22, and most people think that I'm like 15 or 16. One time, i went to the dentist with my mom (coz we were about to buy some groceries) to get my wisdom teeth removed and the receptionist handed us out the consent form. after filling out the form and about to sit on the dentist chair, the receptionist rushed in told us that my mom forgot to sign the parental consent form. After a few seconds she asked, "are you 18?". Then i said "I'm actually 21". She was like, "no way!!!" and shared her amazement to her co-worker "veinte uno"(while pointing me out).after getting my wisdom teeth removed, the dentist was discussing with her assistant what type of pain-reliever he's going to give me (dentists/doctors are hesitant to give teens addictive pain-relievers such as those with codeine or concerned if the patient is to young to receive the drug). he thought that i was still below 18 and the assistant replied, "he's alreday 21"Whenever I buy games rated mature, watch movies, buy lottery tickets, I'm always being asked to show my ID and very often, they are amazed seeing that i was born in 1986. And sometimes, when I tell people i already finished college, people can't help it but to ask how old i am; but finishing college at 20 is still pretty young though.there are tons out there searching for the fountain of youth but you must have had tasted a drop from it. Sometimes, you may feel being laughed at today but you'll surely have the last laugh in future. don't you think it's pretty cool doing teenage stuff in your 20's or even 30's without looking funny?
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reader, NZer  +, writes (26 August 2008):
I am a 16-year old male and I look about 13-14. I get so annoyed by my friends who mock me constantly about being short and looking like a kid. This one guy who is my friend mocks me the most yet I am far smarter than him. Being smaller than most of my friends they think I'm a pushover because I won't stand up for myself, but what I am a going to do?. I can't fight back without being seriously hurt. They blatantly point out my flaws, and I think sometimes they just exploit me for their own personal gain. I think that maybe they are not "just joking" and there is an underlying truth to what their saying. Mind my language but they are just assholes who think its fun to mock others. Of course, we mock each other but its nothing serious, but mocking me is. I know I look young, even teachers know it. At the end of the day, I convince myself its alright and just move along, but one day I know I won't be able to. One day I will just get fed up. There are times when I just want to throw my schooling and job in and just run away.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2008): I probably have this problem worse than anyone else. I am an 18 year old male, and I have matured already, but it doesnt seem to show. Little facial hair, and other manly features. Im about 5"10 and weigh only 110lbs. People probably think that I havent even hit puberty. Im at the point where I lie about my age just to avoid being embarrased. There are 14year olds that look older than me, and it sucks. People always ask if im old enough to buy certain things. Older people always tell you "you will be glad when your older." For some reason, I still feel like a kid even though I am mature and very wise. Sometimes I seem to forget how old I really am. Like I said, Ive always wished I looked my age, but recently I have realized something important. Ive started to realize how much im gonna miss childhood, and this problem has helped me have a few more years of childhood, and now im starting to like it. So just remember, its not the fact that when you get old you will look younger. Its the fact that no matter who you are, you will wish you could go back in time and be a kid again, so use this problem to your advantage and have a little bit more time being young, something you will wish you had when you get old.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2008): I've always looked young for my age. When I was in college people thought I was a freshman in high school. I'm 33 years old and just had a baby and people tell me "Oh you're too young to have a baby." I love to see the looks on their faces when I tell them how old I am! I still hate the way I get treated sometimes by people who think I'm a teenager (which is kind of funny because my husband is a teacher), I just sit back and think the joke is on them because I'm sure most people would love to have this problem. It is great when someone shows up on your doorstep and asks if your parents are home. I would like to say I don't know, would you like me to call them on the phone and find out for you. It is a lot easier to just let them believe you are young that way you don't have to deal with them trying to sell you something.
Best advice I have is to just go along with it and think the joke is on them!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2008): am 19 but look like im 15-16 i guess it is cause of my dad he looks young for someone his age.. but hey the best part about looking young is that we wont have to worry about aging or wrinkles when we are really old say in our late 50s and so on we will look young compared to the other old people
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008): I'm a 17-year-old female (turning 18 in August 2008), and I get furious about the way people treat me based on my looks. They label me as someone who's between around 12-15 even though mentally I am far more creative, witty and mature than they could ever hope to be (though I think they're happier being dumb and ignorant). I don't mean to sound egotistical, it's just that I am so sick of appearance being the driving force of EVERYTHING.
People who have no idea who I am tell me "You're short" or "Oh, you're a senior? I thought you were a freshman!" That kills me. What kind of a thing is that to say to somebody, especially as a conversation-starter? It's rude and completely uncalled for. Think what you want but don't think you can shove something I hate in my face. And honestly, I don't think I'm short! I'm 5'2", which is about average height for an American woman (a bit on the lower end of average, but still average). I also have D cup breasts. My face is a bit young looking, but I would say I look AT LEAST 16 since my eyes have a nice catlike shape to them.
Also, I understand how a lot of people may say "Be happy, because you'll appreciate your youthful looks later in life." But by then...who cares?! It's debilitating to be in college and have guys/gals be embarrassed to be seen with you just because you look younger than them. And by the time you look old enough to have young adults flirt with you, you'll already be married! By then you don't NEED to look young anymore!
But alas, I still refuse to do anything to make myself "older," because wisdom rules all! Makeup is shallow and a waste of time and money, clothes are unimportant and high heels/tall shoes only remind you of how short you are after you step out of them.
Anyway, I would be perfectly fine with my height/face/whatever if it weren't for the insensitive ignoramuses who have to point out your "flaws." Sorry if I sounded angry, but this is one thing that I absolutely cannot tolerate.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): I have the same problem..it seems like a lot of people do here too. I'm 18 and probably look about 15, and i basically am reminded of this every second day by all sorts of stupid people.
People tell me all the time i look 15, at my campus, at work, and when i'm out. It really does piss me off, and a lot of the time i'll snap at them just because i'm tired of hearing it all the time. I totally agree with what another guy said, is that is can never understand what a person thinks in their heads where they would feel it's necessary to say such a statement.
I can't exactly prove myself physically when someone talks to me like i'm a 15 year old and is disrespectful because although i'm quite tall (6"1) i'm not built out yet so i have to just accept it, and after trying a lot i find it extremely difficult to bulk up and put on weight - It's genetic for me. Even though i am physically the size of an 18 year old, people still mistake me for a 15 year old..and it is really uncommon for people of that age to be my size. But they just can't seem to calculate that in their heads.
I just try to accept that i look younger then i am, because i feel better knowing that i'm past that stage of my life, who cares what other people think? If they choose to talk to you like that they are mentally and socially impaired and will usually have the maturity of a 13 year-old.
I think it's just something you'll have to put up with the time being, accept it in your head, and try not to let others opinions get you down, because no one is perfect, and you'll be better of in the long run.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2008): omg! this frusterates me soo muchI hate it. I look about 9-19 without makeup on and I'm going on 16, it's embarassing, my boyfriend is years older..(19) and is embarassed taking me out cause he looks like a cradle robber cause I look so little. I really would like help on how to look older.I'm 5 feet 100 pounds pretty tiny.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2008): I'm in the same position as most of you here. 25 looking 15. I own my house and still get asked "Is the owner/Mum or Dad in" by salesmen. Its kinda great because I used to get annoyed but now I say "No they're not in" and they leave me alone. Bonus!
It is hard but I will say as you get older, you'll still look young but will find more strength in yourself. It shapes your charachter in a way that others without the same issue won't ever have. At least there's the power of the internet now and just by knowing that we're not alone surely should be comforting. I have a variety of health issues as well as looking young but still regard myself to be "healthy". Thats what's important, stay healthy and don't let the paranoia ruin every day.
Also I always think you only ever look stupid being asked id when you haven't got any and make a fuss! I put mine on the conveyor belt thing in the supermarket with my beer and wine. Don't give them the chance! Mmwwuhahaha!
It'll be ok...........honest! :o)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2008): *sigh* what's sad is I've tried all the things that people in other comments suggested. I wear extremely nice, fitted clothes that belong in more of business setting than a college. I never go out without the right makeup,and usually I wear heels to add to my height (I'm 5'2 and weigh 98 pounds =/). Yet I still get comments from people saying that I look like I'm 12 and belong in elementary school. This kills me every time because I'm going to be 20 in less than a month. Honestly I would be happy with someone thinking I was 16- at least then I wouldn't look like I was pre-pubsecent! I don't understand how some people can be so ridiculously stupid- honestly would a 12 year old girl be wearing heels, makeup, be speaking coherently, and carrying a COSMO magazine??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2008): I am 20 years old, and people tell me that I look like I am 14. I am not short or very skinny, I am just of normal height and weight. It is just that I have young looking features. I am glad to look young though because I know when I get old, I will enjoy it a lot.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2008): Aged 17 and I still look like I'm 13/14. The people who started high school would think I'm in their year and to make it worst half of them taller than I am. I'm skinny and short. I think I might have stunted my height somehow during my puberty, maybe it was my constant skipping of breakfast/lunch just to get to school in time.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008): Being in your 20s, Male, blonde, young looking and short can suck. Girls get away with looking young. Us blokes have to go through hell for some years. Superficial, bastard, image obsessed society. We will get our revenge though.....
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007): There is a gene that codes for young characteristics. Evolutionary speaking humans have evolved to keep their younger traits, such as less hair, a smaller lower jaw that no longer holds our molar that why they must be removed or suffer the pain. Biologically looking young is ok, on the constrast society has made it hard for most of us. I am 23 and look as if I was 18. I am a science teacher and some of my students look like me, but definitely are not mature. Regardless of my appearance I act my age and my students respect me and admire. My students tell me that they enjoy having me a teacher because they can relate to me, rather than having som old mean teacher. When I hit the clubs I sometimes get asked for ID, but sometimes a have a mean attiudea the door, (lol) and the bouncers dont say anything. If you want to look older, I am a guy, just dress more professional it helps, I always tuck my shirt in and dont dress to sporty with the baseball caps, nor wear baggy clothes. It helps. Cheer up !! We young looking people are hot anyways hahahah TAKE CARE !!!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2007): Hey I'm a 25 year old male and have heard my whole life that I look young. I would meet people and they would ask my age and then immediately say "really you're 22 you look like you're 16". It was always annoying and I would get pissed off and sometimes snap at them. If it was an older woman I'd be like "thanks, you look like your 60". I never understood what goes on in a persons head where they would feel it's neccessary to say that.
When I was around 22-23 I worked out a bit and put on some weight and stopped wearing a hat and stopped shaving the hair on my chin (cause it doesn't grow on my cheeks yet) and it helped a lot. No more "you look 15" and I stopped getting carded for cigs. Just recently I lost alot of weight and immediately started getting carded again and the lady at the security check in the airport told me I look 19 last week (which was the first time in over 2 years) so I'm gonna go get my weight back up.
People are not that smart. They don't like to think much. If you work out and put on some muscle maybe wear some boots with a thick bottom the brilliant brains of the people you meet will think "duh big = older". If you dress older it will probably help too. I still wear my baggy jeans and hoody cause I'm just gully like that but if you can wear some slacks or khakis or that type of ugly looking crap. Also be a little more aggressive than you want to be if you're at a bar or on the street (not at work) and you become aware of someone talking down to you or testing you stand tall and be firm and let them know you're going to demand respect by force if it comes down to it.
Probably being really rich helps too. I'm really broke so I don't know but I had a friend when I was in school same size and real young looking but he had a BMW and a billion dollar allowance and would date these girls who were a lot taller and older looking than him. But of course it was his "confidence" not his money that they liked.
Plus I dunno how much you deal with it but when I was your age I was constantly having to prove myself and getting into fights. Cause as a guy you feel disrespected when some guy starts talking to you like you're a kid or trying to be aggressive and dominant. And if you are with a cute girl sometimes guys will try to hit on her. Basically a lot of guys just approaching you or talking to your girlfriend like you're a bitch who isn't going to be a threat to them. At first it's like the guy isn't directly insulting you and it's kinda unspoken in the air and you don't want to just directly punch him in the face cause you'll look like a dick. But after a while basically I started just talking shit to the guy and not caring what anyone thinks about it. But I'm also gully with hands so if you really can't fight maybe you should learn to box first or something. If i was more clever I'd figure out some kind of way to indirectly talk shit back to him to where we both know what's up while people around don't.
Then people tell you when you're 35 it will be great but I plan on being married when I'm 35 not cruising around looking for 21 year old women. And most 21 year old women looking for someone that old are looking for a guy that looks like "daddy" not a young looking one. Unless you want to be a creepy 35 year old who's friends are all in their early 20's.
The reality is people will treat you with less respect or talk to you like you're a kid because we live in a superficial society where most people make assumptions about you based on physical appearance such as how old you look. You have to work a lot harder to command respect and to be taken seriously especially at a job or in a business environment. Someone your age who looks a lot older will be treated like he is a mature and responsible adult even if he is a clown. That's just how life is.
Basically when you meet a lot of people they will get an immediate physical impression that you are younger than you are. But the more they are around you and see you being an adult that impression will go away.
Also man, I don't know where you live that getting carded is a big deal to you. Most clubs and bars card everybody under 30 except slutty looking chicks.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2007): I'm 25 but look 19 at the oldest. still get stopped for ID in clubs/pubs. I usually find that telling them confidently that I'm 25 and making it clear that I'm surprised they're asking me my age works quite well.When I was 16 and starting sixth form at school, I looked 12 or 11, seriously. It was a nightmare. being quite small, and thin, and young face was what did it. I went to an all boys school but our sixth form was joined with a girls school and there were girls there in year 10 and 11 who looked much older than me and they would make comments all the time.I got child fare on the bus/tube till I was 18 though!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): Im nearly 27 and have look about 19, tops. i get i.d'd all over the place. Its annonoying as its the only time i get reminded. Except when i meet new people, or look in the mirror. My brother is not as tall as me and 5 years younger, people still ask who is the oldest. I'm sure i'll appreciate it a lot when i'm 40 something, but right now it seems a bit 'Ground Hog Day'. I'm bored of looking like a teenager and having to deal with the attitude you get from people for it.I'm sure its not as bad for girls. Most of the ones i know spend lots of time making themselves look younger, since they past 21, anyway.
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female
reader, LIL ONE +, writes (7 September 2007):
I am 43 years old and 5'2 tall even now i still look younger than i am.I suppose it is a nice thing looking that bit youunger.Obviously while growing up it wasnt nice having to take i.d out to clubs and that but never mind.Even at school i was one of the shortest kids in school also at work.
Just appreciate it.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2007): I think mine is really the worst. I will be 33yrs old soon, I met an old man through work, and to my surprise he said that I looked as if I had just gotten out of high school. WOW! What embarrasment!
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2007): Just Act your normal age and that is about All I can tell you because I am 19 years old and people say I look 15 or 16 just ignore what people say because no one is perfect and that is how it is in this society thanks 1-224-659-0526 Dave
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2007): im 17 and i look 14,, its so annoying, no-one invites to party-it sucks. people always make fun of me. Any suggestions?
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female
reader, vina_101 +, writes (20 December 2006):
 I'm the opposite. I look older for my age. It comes in handy when going to clubs and stuff but...y'know. Anyway to look older it helps if you don't wear hoodies and trainers and tracksuits and stuff like that. I never wear that sort of thing. Not that there's anything wrong with dressing like that, I'm just saying if you want to look older then steer clear from them. I'm not saying dress frumpy either but you know what I mean. Go for a more classy look. Handbag, matching shoes and belt, some kind of formal/casual jacket and a skirt or trousers. Sexy but sophisticated, young but chic. Look in cosmo or one of those kind of magazines and get some ideas.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2006): I understand where you are coming from. You, like me probably don't get the respect that you deserve because of you look so young. Then I think why do I need the respect of people who havn't taken good care of themselves? Taking good care of yourself does not cost a fortune, eg drink lots of water with lemon juice in it. Moisturise!I love my looks and now secretly laugh at people who look so old in comparison to their potential.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2006): You should be happy you look so young. Just think of the benefits in the future. I am 25 and look considerably younger than I am. I love it. I take great pride in this. I am no prune like some women my age. Be happy!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2006): omg! err! im small i'm 15 and i look 11 it is in no way good to look young when you look this young !!! its not a blessing guys dont like me and i dont get invited to parties because i look so young and i'm never goingto get into clubs until i'\mm 20 something help!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2006): Hon, you should be flattered that you look younger than your age! I know I am! I'm 24 and STILL get asked for ID when I go to pubs/clubs etc. (Legal age here is 18) The only problem I have is when I'm out somewhere that I keep getting hit on by 18 year old guys fresh out of high school, because they think I'm the same age as them! Why in Gods name would you want to look older? Women everywhere spend a fortune on looking younger. HAving said that, though, keep in mind that appearance isn't everything in life, but your personality you will have forever. Try to see the flattering side of it, and more importantly - enjoy your youth. Heck, you're only young once! :)
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female
reader, emma H +, writes (2 September 2006):
How lucky you are to look younger than you really are. Be positive about it and just think that when you're forty you'll probably look 35 or even younger. If you really want to look your age or older try wearing make up and classic clothes. Maybe change your hairstyle, perms often make you look older. Try to deal with the situation when asked your age in a mature way by just showing them your ID very quickly and without a fuss. I'm sure that you're the envy of many people.
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female
reader, helpful girl +, writes (2 September 2006):
 well im 19 20 in march and i always get asked for ID.
you could try things like more make up, woman clothes. some times haveing your hair down instead of up in a bobble makes some people look older.
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male
reader, tux  +, writes (2 September 2006):
 Don't fret this too much.. like everyone has been saying... it'll be a blessing later :) I'm 28 and still get carded for cigs and alcohol on occasion... but i bet the harsher part would be on your boyfriend if you had one that looked older.. People most likely would stare *gasp* what why care about that?
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female
reader, DrPsych + ♥, writes (2 September 2006):
 My husband is 25...and he STILL gets asked for ID at bars and club doors. He gets all embarrassed but I try to tell him that I would love to be stopped for age reasons :-) Try not to worry about it...in a few years time you will be asking how can I make myself look younger!
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female
reader, bonym +, writes (2 September 2006):
 My dear when you are 40 you will wish you still had the youthful fresh look!!!! If you have ID whats the problem, you are 19 so you are allowed in any bar arent you? Be glad you have young, fresh looks. xXx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2006): I know I'm 4 foot 10 i'm 18 and look like i'm 12 and it's sux alot of the time, people always comment and it gets so frustrating but you knwo what think of things this way you can continue to pay child prices for everything it's pretty cool unless you have to show ID. So it can at times be very benefiteal being looking young. Best thing to do is not to think about it, I don't like to think of myself as being as short as everyone else or as young looking, just cope.
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female
reader, kristinp +, writes (2 September 2006):
It is a good thing that you look cheares it and be happy with the way you look
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male
reader, martini  +, writes (2 September 2006):
 It's okay. I'm nearly 28, and I've been checked for ID almost every time I go to a pub/bar, casino, etc.
Staying young, looking young, feeling young are things to try to cherish, rather than get rid of! 8]
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female
reader, brown_iz08 +, writes (2 September 2006):
 Trust me, I can completely empathize with u. I am 17, gonna turn 18 this Nov. & everyone makes comments how I look around 12 or 13!! It's soo frustrating & annoying, but it doesn't rly help that I have a round face & am only 5ft tall. I am the shortest in my ENTIRE family, parents, siblings, cousins, & other relatives alike. I don't know why I'm so short & young looking, sometimes I feel my parents took the wrong kid by mistake @ some point in my life & I'm actually a younger child but I highly doubt that.
Just don't let others get u down. Besides, it'll certainly pay off in several yrs=)
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female
reader, midgetgem +, writes (2 September 2006):
 I've always had the same problem, even now in my thirties I have people mistake me for someone a lot younger! Last time I got asked for my age to buy ciggies I was 27!
Needless to say it is annoying and there's no magic formula on how to 'look older'. Sometimes i get taken for my age the other times I don't.
Is it an old cliche to say just be yourself? If you're the mature young woman you sound that will shine through and say more for you than any make up or clothes.
And the best thing is ... when all your friends who you envy now for looking older, ARE older, you will still look young and they'll envy YOU!!
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male
reader, Mr S +, writes (2 September 2006):
 Hi
You are a very luck girl. There are hundreds of women out there that will read this question and think that you are very luck (they may even be a little avenues)
If it’s the boyfriend factor that worries you (What the Lads think) don’t be worried many men like women that are younger looking. Also any relationship worth anything is based on your personality and not looks. Personalities don’t fade like good looks. In most cases it’s your actions and maturity that determines your age to people not your outward appearance.
So brag about only looking a teenager tern it into a bit of a joke and enjoy your self and carry ID.
To yourself be true
All the best
Mr S
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