A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my bf for just over a year, I love him so much, I nearly died a few months back and since then things haven't been right, he won't open up to me or talk to me. But now I have an STI and I think he has been cheating, he tells me he hasn't and my treatment a year ago didn't work, but I don't think thats true. I'm so scared that he has cheated but I don't think I would leave him even if he had. And I know that makes me a doormat but I have no confidence and was beaten by my ex. I just want him to love me for me, not just use me for sex or try to make me the person he wants me to be.
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confidence, my ex Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2008): You are so young to be faced with this, if he has had unprotected sex or even oral sex then like any one else there is always a chance of cathing a STI, go to the doctor or clinic and find out for sure, if he has been playing about dump him, get treated and get on without this pondlife round about you, hopefully you don't have anything more than a brokenheart.
A
male
reader, Boredatwork +, writes (5 December 2008):
 I think I replied to your previous question also regarding the STI, heres my 2pence worth (I used to be a serial cheater, then I found 'the one' and keep it firmly in my pants now'.At 16-17 imo you are way to young to tie yourself down to someone that you believe has cheated on you. If you were both threated, and you now have it again a year later then one of you must have had sex with someone who is infected.As I asked in my previous answer, do you have symptioms, and if so are they only recent? I assume you havent had them since you were last treated. You must have picked up it from somewhere.People do and can change, but if you think/know he has cheated on you, would you be happy spending the rest of you life with him? Not knowing where he is and what/who he is doing? (sorry for being blunt). A relationship is and always should be built on trust, you need to have that or it wont work.So I guess the big question is, can you trust him? If you can and love him then make it work.If you cant trust him, then im sorry to say it, but you probably have no future together.You should have plenty of confidence, many women and men post on here in there 40's saying they have never had a partener, your 16-17 and have had atleast two. I dont think you have anything to be worried about regarding confidance,Get yourself back out there, and find someone who treats you with the respect that you deserve. Dont let anyone treat you like doormat (as you put it). YOU are worth far much more than that. Everyone is!Hope this helps, feel free to msg me :)
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A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (5 December 2008):
 If you have an STI you have contracted it from someone, is it him? Has he been treated also, because if he hasnt then it will keep coming back at you as he will still be carrying it. If you still want him and don't trust him , firstly he must be checked out and you need to be using a condom at all times because this will stop you being re infected. You can't trust him but you say you still will want him to come to you, then you will always have insecurities. If he is seeing other women he can't possibly give you the love you want as true love is shared between two people alone disregarding all others. You need to get yourself well and fit and decide what you really want out of life. hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, vikkicutie +, writes (5 December 2008):
 hun you do need to let him go! you can find someone who cares and loves you as much as you would them. you just need to be patient and not look. they say that if you dont go looking for it, it will come and find you.not all guys are like that you need to spend some time on your own with friends, family. ull soon get your confidence back!noone can make you something your not, there is something wrong if he is trying to change you. this is not on!! if you keep sleeping with him you may catch something else if he has cheated on you!hope this has helped and hope you do the right thing! look after number one: YOU!
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