A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I’ve been with my boyfriend for over 2 years now (living together for 1) and I’m 22 and he’s 27. When we first got together I was studying at university and he was earning a lot so used to spoil me rotten and pay for everything. However when I graduated and got a good paying job, he lost his and was unemployed for months. Now he's got another job but its minimum wage and he hates it. Its a physically demanding job with rubbish hours and he’s at the bottom and his managers and supervisors are all younger than him. He says he feels useless because I’m younger than him and I’ve got a decent job with normal office hours and I earn twice as much as him for sitting on my arse all day. He gets angry when I offer to pay for things but I only do it because I can afford it and he cant. I don’t want him getting himself into debt when there’s no point as I’ve got the money. He paid for everything for the first year of our relationship when I was studying so this is my way of repaying him. I don’t see my wages as being my own money because we live together so what’s mine is his. To make matter worse he just got turned down for a job promotion because of lack of experience within the company and someone younger than him got the job instead.He’s so depressed with his job and he’s constantly looking for new ones but there are hardly any out there that he can get with his experience and qualifications and he doesn’t really know what he wants to do as a career. Since loosing out on the promotion he is really moody and off with me and I don’t know what to do. He keeps saying how his life is shit and he’s fed up with everything. What can I do? I hate seeing him like this and I feel guilty every time I get a bonus at work but I only tell him about them when we have been worrying that we wouldn’t have enough money for a large bill coming up and the bonus would sort that out. How can I make him happy and not feel his life is so shit?
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at work, debt, depressed, his ex, money, university Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (8 May 2010):
 Maybe you can get him a dog.Interacting with them will help him to get over his problems.
Make love more as the brain will produce more serotonin and make him feel happier.
Do something together or go on a trip.
Count your blessings because there are people who are more unfortunate than him and are jobless and homeless.
for more,
http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/stop-feeling-depressed/
A
female
reader, Xtina356  +, writes (8 May 2010):
You just have to tell him that he's smart and you have confidence that when the economy picks up, he'll get a good job again. If possible, he should take this opportunity to go to school so that he can become qualified for a better job when the economy picks up. He should take out student loans and worry about them later. Trade school?The employment market is competitive so he should focus on what he can do to set himself apart and stand out instead of feeling sorry for himself. Right now, sounds like he's paying his dues and unfortunately, he has younger people who got into the company before him. He needs to push his previous experience and how it can help his current employer.
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