A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:ok this is such a obvious crush, its embarrassing... but i really like one of the personal trainer at my gym. i know, how predictable! and i was just thinking how do i get to know him in causal way. it also got me thinking about people's opinions of body size. as this guy obviously has a very "good" body, hes tall and muscular so its unlikely hes going to be attracted to all 135lbs of me sweating on a machine! but it made wonder do people with very good bodies immediately judge potential partners for not being so physically fit? majority of my previous boyfriends have had "good" bodies or they thought mostly being very lean and strong or bulking. seeing as people's body size/shape never personally changes if im attracted to someone or not i want to know what everyone else thinks! also how i might possibly go about getting my personal trainer ;)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2014): I was with my ex for 8 years, wasn't a particularly good relationship and I used to spend all my time at the gym just to stay out! Met my current BF there - he was my personal trainer! Been together a year and a half and living together one year! We became friends first as we were both in relationships. Did a yoga class together outside the gym and got closer. When we got together he told me that he had to think long and hard about it. It's not professional to date clients, he'll only do it once so as not to get a reputation. That reason I was 'special'! Anyway I used to be so paranoid about being a bit flabby, but he loved my body. PTs are often good people, there job is to encourGe and motivate people to live healthier lives . They see all body shapes! I'm ripped now by the way! ;-)So dont worry, make sure he's not a womaniser, get to know him better first... Allot of women develope crushes on their trainers by the way so he may be used to it! I
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (9 February 2014):
 Since he isn't YOUR personal trainer, I will revise the advice a little.
Why not talk to him? Small talk? Where he is from? His age, family, school, favorite music, movies, what not - if he HAS a GF he might bring that up himself.
But in all honesty, you are having a crush because how he looks. Because you don't know him. So I would get to know him instead of going "fan-girl" on him.
As for what a person who is really fit prefers, I think it's usually a partner who enjoys the same fitness level or sport - it's not so much about a specific body type - but you will have the typical "gym-rats" who rather work out, then go out. And then you have the "work out + take "enhancement" supplements and party every week-end.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (9 February 2014):
 People with very good bodies at my age have earned their bodies and fitness.
You have to eat right and move and make healthy choices.
You wrote "seeing as people's body size/shape never personally changes if im attracted to someone or not i want to know what everyone else thinks! also how i might possibly go about getting my personal trainer"
People's body shape and size do change if there is overeating and lack of exercise or if there is healthy eating and exercise. You get bigger if you eat more than you can metabolize in a healthy way, you get fit if you exercise and eat to fuel your body just enough to keep it healthy. Are you trying to say that you don't have a preference to body type?
Then you go on say that your boyfriends have had "good" bodies or were lean and strong.
We can't tell you how to 'get' your personal trainer without more details.
Is he single? Is he dating? is he married? Does he have a family?
If you want to sleep with him and he's into casual sex that probably won't be too difficult.
If he's waiting until marriage then that will probably be more of a project.
Is there a particular reason you want to get with this personal trainer?
If you just want to get to know him around the gym, say hi and work out in the area he's using, but do not interrupt a personal training session. The client in this case has paid for his time and he will not be happy that you are trying distract from his client's time.
Hang around the desk when he's coming in. Make friends with the people he seems to be friends with in the gym.
Your hidden question was "[why] do people with very good bodies immediately judge potential partners for not being so physically fit?]" I don't have a supermodel body but I have stamina and core strength and a level of fitness that keeps me wanting to move.
What I see in people who are not fit is that they tend to be very passive about their activity choices. They don't go for a bicycle ride, or go skiing or for a long hike because they don't have the fitness level to do so.
I'm going to be bored by a guy whose only interest is sitting in front of the TV or the computer and gaming. That's a passive activity, muscle and fitness wise, no matter how much 'skill' it takes to get high scores.
If I see a really large person who is not eating well or who smokes and clearly is not taking care of themselves, well, that would be off-putting to me. There is a big difference between being an ultra-marathon competitor and a weekend 5K warrior, however.
Sorry, I made a far longer post than needed for this question.
I would not try to date your own personal trainer until you know if he is single or married or otherwise attached. You can find this out through simple, polite questions.
Get back to us once you know his status.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionnahh he aint my personal trainer specifically, i dont have sessions with him or pay for him. but thanks anyways :)
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (9 February 2014):
I think having a crush on your trainer is "harmless", but I don't think you should "go for it". I think you should try and curb that crush. And see him as your trainer, not some piece of meat.
He is your trainer, he is PAID to pay you attention and try and get you fit - so YOU can feel better about YOU. Not so he can mold you into his "perfect physical partner".
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