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I had sex with my best friends boyfriend while she was asleep in the same bed. She seemed ok with it at first, now we hardly talk.

Tagged as: Cheating, Friends, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 September 2006) 5 Answers - (Newest, 30 August 2012)
A female , anonymous writes:

i got really close to one of my co-workers and were like best friends and i considered her almost like a sister i never had. we go out with our other co-workers and my best friends boyfriend. so one night we got really drunk at the club and i ended up sleeping over my best friends house and her boyfriend wasnt that i slept next to my bestfriend in her bed and so i was passing out and i remember her boyfriend trying to sleep on the bed so i was ok with sleeping on the floor and he insistead on me sleeping on the bed. so i was passed out and just remeber him kissing me and then touching me. then i passed out then we started to do it and i passed out and then i woke up when he told me not to tell my best friend who was sleeping right next to us. so i started to cry and he keep telling me just forget about what ever happened and he was gonna take care of it. and the next morning we all had work together and my best friend was okay so after work i called her and she was like ohh he told me everything dont worry about it, im not mad. but i knew just for me i had to tell her as much as i could rememeber....come to find out all he said was ohh he thought i was his girlfriend and we almost did it but stopped...ever since i told her wat i knew we dont speak to each other at work we only talk to each other if we have to...and it sucks because i didnt want this at all...i wont have done this sober and i wouldnt have made this used to being single and didnt want this at all...i miss your friendship and i would do anything to be on good terms with her again and be able to talk to each other like old times!! and i know its going to take time and i deserve her not speaking to me... the thing also is that i have a feeling she doesnt believe my story at all and beleives her boyfriend...what can i do so i can try to make things better? do think she will ever be my friend again?

View related questions: at work, best friend, co-worker, drunk, kissing

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A female reader, flys United Kingdom +, writes (30 August 2012):

your feeling is correct.

you shouldnt have slept with him but now that you have you have. even though what you did was bad dont beat yourself up. even if your bff isnt speaking to you now one day hopefully she will totally forgive you.

i hope that you will only ever sleep with your boyfriend in futre.

hope this helped.


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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008):

Truth be told you don't deserve to be forgiven. You had sex with your best friend's boyfriend. He cheated on his girlfriend with you. There's nothing about that situation that spells "Mistake". You mentioned "and I passed out" so many times that it almost seems like you were trying to cover it up. Sounds like you weren't passing out at all. No matter how drunk you are, if you're not passing out you still have the ability to make decisions and you made the wrong one. Now you have to live with it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008):

you made a mistake... people make mistakes all of the time.

maybe you need to find a new best friend... or you can just remember that time will heal all wounds.

i did the same thing in high school. i slept with my best friends boyfriend and she found out. she forgave him but i don't think that she ever truly forgave me...

we still talk and go out for coffee together, so maybe there is hope for you and your best friend after all!

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A female reader, delicious poison United Kingdom +, writes (27 November 2007):

i just found out on saturday that my so called friend slept with my ex that im still in love with she said that she was drunk but that doesnt excuse it, im trying hard to still talk to her but cant believe that she would do that.i told her that there's a certain line that yuo dont cross and she did

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A female reader, Toria +, writes (22 September 2006):

Toria agony auntYou did one of the worse things you could ever do to a friend and I'm afraid to say really not worth forgiving you over but nothing stops you working at trying to get her forgiveness and only time will tell.

Either way you really need to learn from this and not make the same mistake again or you will find yourself without any friends at all.

We all make the mistake of believing or trusting in the wrong people and eventually something will happen that will make us realise that we made the wrong choice and if she is believing her boyfriend over you and his story is incorrect then you just need to hope that someday she will see the truth.

The mistake you need was you should have told your friend yourself and first instead of leaving it hoping it went away.

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