A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my BF for 3 years now. Looking back, I feel like he was a rebound for me because my first love had completely betrayed me. Of course, I wasn't aware of it at the time. A year into our relationship he moved countries to be with me and we'd continued to thrive together. However, recently, I have no sexual desires towards him. I find him attractive to a certain extent but I don't find myself getting turned on by him any more. I can't remember the last time we had sex and I didn't pretend he was someone else. I'm craving to just go out and have a one night stand. When we have sex it just feels so routine and abrupt, we don't really have any chemistry. What I want, he just wouldn't do.Although we still get on, I don't know if I even love him now. The thought of him leaving is severely distressing but I don't know whether that's love or my abandonment issues. I'm just so confused and stuck in a bind. I mean this guy moved to a different country to be with me, our families have invested in this relationship too, I can't just say 'it's over' now. I'm absolutely stuck and I'm only 19.I'm at the point where I'm hoping he will cheat just so I have an excuse. I don't think I would even care if he did cheat though. What do I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2013): Don't worry, you're never stuck in a relationship you don't want to be in!! Learn this now. Love yourself more than you love to please other people!! I used to be so flexible and just tried to keep everyone happy but realized that I was only making myself miserable by not taking care of myself.He will only go back to the country he came from if you break up if he hasn't fallen in love with Australia (says your flag). So don't worry you guys can still be in each others lives probably. If you have been with your boyfriend for 3 years and have now seen that you can't see yourself with him for a long run in the future, then maybe it's best to find someone who you really do love. You may still love your boyfriend, but there is a difference between loving someone and being IN LOVE with someone. Hopefully it's the latter when you are in a committed relationship.Please don't cheat on him. No one deserves those mental scars. I have been cheated on twice and made me develop a lot of trust issues that isn't fair on a person. It's just not morally right to cheat and you will feel such guilt.I have posted on here before with my own relationship issues, and all I can say is that usually when I am asking the question, I know the answer as I am typing it out.You know what to do love :)Make yourself happy. Life is too short 3I'm only 21 so I know where you're coming from. Find someone who sweeps you off your feet. They are out there somewhere :*
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