A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have recently started talking to a guy via work email. He works in a different part of the country and we started talking by accident after a case of mistaken identity. On the first day he made an inappropriate comment, but I rolled with it and glossed over it jokingly. From then he emailed me every day, asked me to send him a picture, asked for my phone number. I sent him these, thinking that I enjoyed talking to him and he seemed quite sound. But then he started talking about how sexy he thought I was and how he wanted us to meet up, and even proposed! I told him I'm not ready for a relationship or anything right now, but he's persisting anyway. I'm running out of energy turning him down. I've ignored him since he sent a really inappropriate text message, but if he gets in touch again how can I let him down gently without repeating myself (which he chose to ignore)? I feel guilty because looking back it seems like I've led him on, but I had no intentions of doing so and never said anything inappropriate from my side! I don't want to get bosses involved because it's not a big deal, just don't want to hurt his feelings!!
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (25 November 2009):
 I really think that the only way to get this persistent guy off your back is to be firm. Don't gently dance around what you want of him, just put it out there and be assertive. You don't need to be mean about it, but you do have to be clear and don't waver at all. Say, "I'm sorry, but I'm not interested in you and don't want you to call or text anymore". When you are gentle, he chooses to ignore you, maybe he doesn't think that you're serious... but show him that you are serious, and if he continues to bother you, then you should absolutely let the bosses know. Especially if you've already been clear with him to stop. You don't want some creeper stalking you!!
Good luck, sweetness!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2009): Cheers for changing it guys, didn't want to come across as a totally heartless b*tch :p
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2009): ok, i have had this kind of thing happen to me before too. well, first you will want to kind of stop talking to him so much and stuff. then the bond that you have from talking to him so much will diminish even more. by that time you won't feel too bad to tell him your true feelings and what you want. i hoped that helped!! good luck!!
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (25 November 2009):
 Title has been changed for you poster, sorry for the mistake on behalf of the mods (we are all human after all)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2009): Thanks for the mis-leading title DC, kinda missed my entire point with that one.
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