A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been seeing my boyfriend for about 9 months and we have been "official" for 4. (we're long distance, but I will be home this summer). This is both of our first relationships, so we've been taking things really slowly. I've given a few hand jobs and I do love him and want him to feel good, but I find it really uncomfortable. It's awkward and my hands and wrists get really sore, plus sometimes it takes forever. I'm not ready to go down on him yet. Any advice to make it a bit easier for me? Thanks.
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male
reader, oldfool  +, writes (29 April 2008):
 It sounds terribly mechanical.
Apart from the hand jobs, what else have you done? Deep kissing? (I hope so!) Nibbling on ears? Kissing the neck? Fondling of breasts? Fondling down there? These things are all incredibly important in love making, whether you finish with intercourse or with a hand job. For me, a hand job can only be part of an integrated whole, not an isolated service operation. By the time you get to the hand job, he should be excited and raring for the home stretch.
Getting down to technique, depending how sensitive and turned on he is, gentle touching and fondling -- softly running your hand up the shaft -- can be very exciting, and isn't necessarily tiring. Or try a gentle circular motion as you move up the shaft. As Collaroy said, lubricant can help (or if you want to be kinky, try putting some of your own juices on there!) You can save the rough up and down motion for the later stages, when he's getting closer to shooting.
What else do you do while you are doing this for him? Is he allowed to touch your breasts? That should help keep up his excitement. Another thing: try cupping his testicles snugly in your other hand while you masturbate him. You can even apply a bit of mild pressure. That will add to his excitement and bring him closer to ejaculation. Finally, try pushing down on his abdomen, around the top of the pubic hair. That can also literally push the juices where they're supposed to go. (I once had a girl lean on my lower abdomen and it was a really nice feeling!)
As you can see, there are lots of things you can explore before you move on to giving him head! Take your time with each step and it can only get better and better as you go!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhe tries :) and he's very sweet. we're working on it.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy +, writes (29 April 2008):
 Hi,
learn some technique. Do you use lube? If not do it now.
Also concentrate on the head of the penis, massage it more as this is the sensitive part of the penis.
As you are both very inexperienced he is more likely to be reluctant to point out what you are doing wrong.
So you dont have to pump furiously, that doesnt make him cum quicker, but spend more time massaging the head of his penis should make it a bit quicker.
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A
female
reader, notinthesane +, writes (29 April 2008):
 I am not to crazy about hand jobs for the same reason. I think that all you can really do is try to find a comfortable postion for your hand and, if you aren't, use some lubrication. Just a small heads up...blow jobs aren't very comfortable either. That's why I think these things are best when they are fore play. Jaws and hands get tired. I hope that he is also doing his part to be intimate with you though.
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