| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Hi,I'm 23yr old woman who is very intelligent and good looking, and believe me I appreciate these gifts. The problem is social, most people are scared of me! Men assume I must be going out with someone. Because I'm seen as a genius most people find it intimidating talking to me, plus I am naturally very quiet so I find it really hard to have a 'normal' conversation. I've only had 2 relationships and in both cases it took over a year of slowly becoming friends before anything happened.Now I think one of my co-workers likes me. When I first started 5 months ago I had an instinct that he liked me but I was still getting over my last relationship so I didn't think about it too much. About 2 months ago I realised that I really liked him. At this point I lost all judgment, and was no longer certain whether he liked me too.We never work directly together, only in the same department so we meet in the staff room or corridor or at meetings but there always seems to be someone around. I've only had one long conversation with him alone - 3 months after starting - the first thing he said was that he hadn't had the chance to ask me how I liked working there! Whenever he's around I feel like he's looking at me and I've often caught him staring at me. When we are in a meeting and he's talking he'll often be looking at me, or we'll turn and smile at each other when someone makes a joke. He opens doors for me and looks like he doesn't know where to sit when he comes in the room and I'm there. We always end up facing each other on opposite sides of the room! I think he's quite shy so now we've ended up glancing at each other and never saying anything apart from hello and sometimes neither of us dares to do that.He's away for two weeks and when he comes back there will only be two days before I move jobs and start working somewhere else and won't see him again. Obviously, I don't know him very well but from what I've seen I really admire him and I don't want to waste an opportunity as I don't have years to develop a friendship with him first! The main problems are I'm not sure if he is single or whether he does actually like me, we're almost always with other people, and I'm so shy I don't know how I will ever ask him out or what to say. I can't see that he'll dare to do anything though. What can I do?Thanks for any suggestions.
View related questions:
co-worker, shy, spark, workplace Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, pinksoftkitten +, writes (12 July 2005):
Why not give him your number or your email address, and say you've enjoyed working with him, and if he gets the opportunity, maybe you could meet for coffee. That's not too heavy, but if he likes you, he'll call, or email.
A
reader, becky05 +, writes (12 July 2005):
Ask him out directly! the worst he can say is no and if youre moving jobs you wont have to see him again. It sounds like he does like you though, I would take the chance.
...............................
A
male
reader, ticketman +, writes (12 July 2005):
all you do is invite him to a social gathering, like maybe a going away party (for you) w/ mutual co-workers that he knows that will help to break the tension or maybe a movie you got free passes to (wink) but no one to go w/ example: I know this is last minute but i got these free tickets to a movie would you like to got tonight and if he likes you he will go and if he already has plans then hes 'not that into you' but if he makes a date for another nite then maybe?good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, orchidblossom +, writes (12 July 2005):
This sounds like a wonderful potential. I would definitely pursue it. Try and take the next opportunity to start a conversation with him- he may like you but be too intimidated or shy to talk to you. The conversation doesn't have to be long, but just try and be relaxed and friendly, easy to talk to, just be yourself! You can talk about the new job you're taking, your feelings about it, etc. At then end of the conversation, ask him if he would like to exchange emails. Chances are he won't refuse, plus emails are less invasive than phone numbers. Or, you can take a bold move, jot down your phone number and give it to him, and let him know that you'd like to get to know him better. Something like this may be out of the blue, but remember, he will probably be so elated that he won't care! If you really like him don't let this chance pass you by! Good luck!
...............................
|
