A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 months. He is 19 but acts like a 15 year old;he is childish,immature and downright annoying.I am 17 but have been through so much in life that I have taught myself to be logical,rational and unbiased. We live with his family,and I believe its because of them and how he was raised that he is like this.His family are really dysfunctional;rude,uncaring,selfish and two faced.He was pretty much perfect when we first starting seeing each other,now he swears at me and reflects the negative attitude he has towards his mother and familt upon myself.I have tried many times the past few months to have a civil conversation with him but he ignores me,goes on the computer or yells at me about completely different and irrelevant things and we just end up fighting and blaming each other.IT'S KILLING ME! PLEASE HELP!
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy boyfriend WAS one of those quiet guys..
He never goes out and sits at home playing computer games.
He's never had a gf or anything before,so I obviously tried really hard to be patient with him.
Of course it's not just being immature that's his only issue,its just the most annoying one that causes most conflict between us.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2008): I think lots of women have a real problem about blaming everything they don't like about their man on "immaturity." I say this because when you call his issues "immaturity" it carries the implication that he will someday be "mature" and leave this stuff behind. I'm not so sure.Have you thought hard about how much of this stuff is "immaturity" and how much of it is just him not being what you want in a BF? There really ARE a lot of "mature" guys in their teens and early 20s. But they're not the ones getting everyone's attention. They're not the ones partying the hardest and trying to lead the group all the time. They're not the ones doing all the flirting and making passes at girls. The REAL mature guys your age are the quieter ones that are probably going under your radar.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou all for trying to help me out....
x0x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2008): Not trying to overlook your caring for this person, but the cold reality is that you are too young to be wasting your time with someone who is making you that crazy. Frankly, most guys don't grow up till much later in life, if ever!
If he is making you that upset, cut the ties and find better. Even if better is being by yourself for awhile.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have tried to talk to him...he is too immature to understand and he ignores me most of the time.
I have given him many chances and he always promises/says he will change and never does..
I have left my home and lost my friends to be with him.
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A
male
reader, Big-b  +, writes (2 September 2008):
I am having relationship problems my self and just posted a question.I really dont know what to tell you other then tell him how you feel and see if he changes.I know speeking for myself that if something I am doing is hurting my relationship then I will try and make that change.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2008): I'm asking seriously, not sarcastic or condescending:You are with this man, Why, exactly?..Your post was well written, and you expressed your frustrations clearly. I don't see why you stay with someone who is (imho) not worth you, at all. He was at his very best when you first started dating, and it's gone steadily and consistently downhill from there over a relatively short five month period.Sorry, miss, but the only course I can see, given what you've posted, is break this off and move on. You deserve a man who treats you Much better; he deserves someone he can respect and love. Unfortunately, for whatever his reasons (and his family doesn't help), that doesn't seem to be you.
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