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How do we help our sister in dealing with infidelity in her marriage?

Tagged as: Family, Marriage problems<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 April 2015) 2 Answers - (Newest, 8 April 2015)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My sister (35) has this week discovered her wife has been having an affair for most of their two year marriage. Needless to say she is devastated and blindsided. Extreme anger giving way gradually to depression. Worst of all she was undergoing fertility treatment recently, which has not yet been successful but she's not coping with having this potential future taken away from her. They will definitely never re-unite.

Us, her family are at a complete loss as to how to help her and can see her getting more reclusive and withdrawn. We have absolutely no experience of dealing with this kind of situation.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (8 April 2015):

So_Very_Confused agony auntLeave her be to mourn her loss for a few weeks.

I agree check on her regularly, bring her food or treats or offer to take her out. IF she declines going out offer to come over... but she needs about 4-6 weeks of misery before she can start feeling semi-human.

Sorry for her pain. and yours. It hurts us so much to watch someone we love suffer.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (8 April 2015):

Honeypie agony auntIt's been a week, let her grieve if she needs to, but I would make sure to check in on her as much as possible. I'd say give her a couple more weeks for the "mourn period" after that, try and see if you can get her to come out and do stuff (not DATE, but see family and friends, go out to lunch dinner, museums, whatnots) Spring is right around the corner, which might help a little too.

She CAN still continue the fertility thing, she will just have to start picturing herself as a single mom (at least for a while) versus a married lady.

I'm sorry she is going through this :(

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