A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My situation is my boyfriend of 2 years is living with me in my flat where I pay the rent and he makes and will continue to make a contribution "when he can" in his words, and the reason for this is that when we were very "in love" in the beginning he had to move out of his flat as the rent was getting too much, so I offered that he move in with me, and here we have been since.I realised then that he was having a bit of a hard time with money but I wanted to help and I thought it would get better.Now I have put up with this for long enough and although I love him I find myself so critical of him because he has not sorted his money out or even tried to get a weekend job in a pub to help.He just seems to be letting the situation run. I think it is time for him and I to split up because no matter how much we enjoy each other this thing is coming between us and I have told him this a few times in a non-aggressive way but I see nothing changing. If this is his "official" home, how do I get him to leave? So far he hasn't - he says he lives here too.
View related questions:
money, split up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (21 July 2012):
 Hi
Ask your landlord to make a seperate lease for your boyfriend so he is legally responsible for half the rent as a joint tennant.
Tell your boyfriend you are doing this as you cant afford to keep him any longer. If you feel he will take it badly then tell him in a public place and if possible have a friend or 2 with you.Chances are he will move out rather than be faced with this responsibility.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (21 July 2012):
 IF his name is not on the lease he shouldn't be there. I think that your landlord can tell him to get out. It may be illegal for him to be there if he's not on the lease and then the police can be involved to evict him.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2012): He doesn't seem to have any shame or pride to live off woman. That's just terrible, it's time for him to man up.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2012): It isn't his home, he isn't even lodging there, he's simply using it as a dos house from the sound of it.
It becomes "His home too" when he starts paying 50% of all money that needs to go into the place.
Its your home and you have 100% of the right to say who stays and doesn't stay.
So if its getting you down this much just tell him to leave because you see nothing changing and he can't continue to remain comfortable at your expense because its not fair on you.
And its also putting strain on your relationship.
...............................
A
female
reader, mpumie  +, writes (21 July 2012):
 Its either you get a new place or call the landlord to issue a notice for him to leave. Talk to your landlord and tell him or her the whole truth and I'm sure he/she will make him to leave.
...............................
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (21 July 2012):
 It sounds as if you have had enough of this free loader and need him out and gone! It's not going to be easy, he is so comfy being taken care of by you, and just like any other parasite it will take a little pressure to remove him.
Talk to your landlord, I assume you signed an agreement of some sort when you moved in, get a copy of that and re read it just to make sure you are doing things correctly. You can try telling him to leave by the end of the week, or within 48 hours. IF this doesnt work, get your father to have a quiet word with him, if he still doesnt leave go to your local police station and ask them what you need to do.
...............................
|
