A
female
age
41-50,
*ana76
writes:Hi everybody, I feel so frustrated because I fell in love with the wrong guy and now I do not know how to get him out of my head. I met him 3 months ago at a movie screening that I went to with my co-workers. I had finished a relationship recently and was not really interested in meeting or dating new people, I was giving myself time. But this guy was really self-confident and went straight to talk to me, making it clear that he liked me, he asked me for my number and I thought "what the hell" and gave it to him. He happened to be friends with my friends, and they helped him because they wanted me to come out of my post-break up depression and also because they liked him. So my friends worked out a gettogether and pushed me to join them, (called me like 200 times, I was at work but managed to join them) and then left us alone so we could "talk". I told him straight away that I thought he was a nice person and that I liked him but that I was not ready to start something new, PLUS he lives abroad, so what kind of relationship we could have? He was really nice to me, he said we could start by having a friendship, that he was really impressed by me, that he thought I was beautiful and brilliant, blah blah blah. Well, to make a long story short, we spent that night together and it was amazing. Then he went back to his country and we stayed in touch by Skype and e-mail. He wanted us to meet last month but I couldn't make it because I am working hard on my Master's degree thesis and also I cannot get days off from work, so we agreed to meet for Christmas, we would both travel to a country in South America and we would meet there. But then.. at the beginning of this month something happened to him, something that has nothing to do with me and he has been depressed about it, he told me that he needed time, that he was not well. I was really sad about him, wanted to hold him, to talk to him, but he did not want to talk. Time passed and passed and still he did not contact me. I had sent him a novel by mail before we stopped talking, not a present but a novel that we talked about and that I wanted him to read, so he finally got it last week and he sent me an e-mail from his work account saying "I have received the material, thank you for sending it, we will consider it blah blah blah" and he copied his associate in the message. I thought that was so rude and did not answer. He treated me like I am a client. Well, it has been a month that we do not talk and I do not know what to think.. I miss him so much, I think about him all the time, am I in love with him?? And if so, how do I fall out of love now?? Because I do not think that we will talk again, and I feel so sad about that, he did not even explain to me what happened, if I did something, nothing. I feel like a fool!! Why did I even agreed to go on a date with him?? Anybody has any ideas, I do not want to love him, I want to forget about him!!
View related questions:
at work, christmas, co-worker, depressed, fell in love Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, nana76 +, writes (28 October 2008):
nana76 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks a lot for the answers you have written. I really like reading that if "loved me and cared for me he would take the time to clarify". I have been denying my feelings all the time, thinking that I cannot love him, that I should not love him, etc., but something I had not considered is the fact that HE DOES NOT LOVE ME, and if he doesn't love me, why should I love him? It is true what one of you wrote: if he loved me, he would care for me, and he doesn't care about how I feel, he probably only cares about himself. And a person like that doesn't deserve to be loved by me. Thanks a lot!! I hope I find my Mr Right soon and I can share it with you!! ;-)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2008): Hi Dear, You should forget that guy, He doesn't respone what he did, and treated you as his client.He don't care of your novel which sent to him. I can guess what you did wrote. If he a nice guy and he love you. He could be contact you and clarify.Anyway, he not a type of guy you have to regret, Just make your mind happy and Looking for an other good guy.Forget about the past and start a new things. You have a long way to go. Don't be struggle to date with an other man. You could have many choice, Oh yeah my dear,I am not sure that my advice is acceptable.Goodluck to you.XXX
...............................
A
female
reader, yourstruly  +, writes (25 October 2008):
 Oh sweety if it was only that easy if we could all control our feelings that would make us not human i can honestly say most of us have been where you are now and you are no fool i personally have been there and done that and the only advice i can give you is allow your self too feel these emotions don't repress these feelings because thats not a good thing in the long run it just sounds like you have too ride the storm things will get better with time just think he obviously wasn't your 'mr right' and just try a friendship with this man as there seems to be many factors as to why you can't be together like distance for example!! I don't know if any of this advice will help you but remember always have faith in yourself and the things you do surround yourself around friends and family that love you and can support you and talk about how you feel your 'mr right' will come along and remember HE will be the luck one!!!Hope this helps keep your chin up honey. Yourstruly.x.
...............................
|
