A
female
age
36-40,
*ade012
writes:SO here...goes ...its VERY long i feel as if i might be getting over my cousin but i know its only temporary. because it's almost like a cycle, i have on and off feelings for my 1st cousin (who although is adopted) i should treat like a brother. he is 2 years younger than me...i am 19....but recently our age difference (physically) just doesnt seem to exist...and i feel as if we're attracted to each other (or atleast i know im attracted to him)....but the thing is.....i like another boy...he used to be my bf...but we broke up a while ago and ive liked him for 3 years so i can say i have very strong feelings for this man....however as soon as i go visit my cousin all those feelings for the other man are just blocked and i start to like my cousin....this has been happening ever since i was about 14 or 15....i just always liked my cousin when i saw him.....i dont kno what to do because i dnt wanna feel this way abt him and i want to be a good sister/cousin...but i cant help it!...i cant even avoid my cousin because our families r so close....im scared this will happen even when i am married or something....so my cousin always calls me his sister...but he doesnt treat me the same as other relatives...he always wants me to sit on his lap, and holds my hand, and hugs me when we sleep next to each other...ive also caught him staring at me many times...and he got really jealous and interrogative when another boy was flirting with me....is this in a protective brotherly way...or because he likes me?...he also always traces around my lips....and he has kissed my neck before (a gentle kiss) but that isnt wat normal cousins would do right?....our families have noticed how close we have gotten and they try to seperate us...so i KNOW i shouldnt be feeling this way....just how can i get over it!??.......he always tells me how much he misses me to and that he misses me 24/7...that just makes me want to see him, talk to him more!!........if SOMEONE has been in the same situation please help me and tell me how to get away from it all..........how do i know if my cousin feels the same for me!? (without actually asking him).......any of ur feedback is helpful :)
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broke up, cousin, flirt, jealous Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tenny  +, writes (25 October 2010):
if u catch him staring at u and looks away if u look back and acts strange around you,,,,,,,,,,,,like if he stammers or maybe tries to b alone wit u
A
female
reader, LoveIsRough  +, writes (12 September 2009):
 I have had several 'lesbian'--even though I am straight--kisses/2nd base experiences with my cousin 'Dana'. We've never gone further than second base, but don't feel ashamed. It happens.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008): hi yeah bout that iam a 10 yrs old girl and i luv my cousin but he dosent he thinks of me as a best freind
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2008): i know what you mean i like my cousin my 1st and when im around him i cant stop looking at him a i hold his hand cause i say i like them and he lets me hold i only c him 1 a year but since i seen him i cant stop thinking bout him
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2008): I'm confused by part of your question where you said your cousin hugs you when you sleep next to each other? Why do you sleep next to each other?
As far as your feelings go, if you feel attracted to him, and you feel like you want to pursue a relationship with him that includes sex, then go for it. The way to know if he is attracted to you is to tespond to his advances. Like, when he traces your lips, kiss him back on the mouth, look him in the eye, and smile at him. When he stares at you, smile at him and wink. Try to be with him alone, talk to him and tell him how you feel and that you would like to spend time with him.
The only way you're going to know if he feels for you when you feel for him is to pursue it. Otherwise you are never going to know and you will regret never taking the chance to find out. If he doesn't feel the same way about you, then there's no harm done and you can quit worrying about it. If he does have feelings for you and agrees to pursue a relationship with you, then you will both enjoy it. You only live once, so go with your feelings and don't worry about what others say or think.
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A
female
reader, starfairy  +, writes (1 March 2008):
 It sounds like you don't really know what you want. Back away from these guys just for a little while so you can get your feelings straight then go from there...
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (1 March 2008):
 so. he's not a blood relation. and he's adopted.
eh ok i see no real problem here.
all i can say is. you ain't related.
if you were then i'd really have something to say about it.
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