A
female
age
30-35,
*avy21
writes:My boyfriend and me were going fine, until this gal was somewhere else. Now since she's back home today, I'm feeling very insecure as my boyfriend likes her(she's more beautiful than me) and they talk over the phone too. Moreover, they live in the same city and again I can't do anything, being miles apart from him(we are in a long distance relationship since 7 months). I've also seen some objectionable posts shared between them on facebook. To top it up, my boyfriend kept all these hidden from me and only told me that this gal proposed him, only to get refused.I'm really feeling very insecure and helpless, as I love my partner a lot and this gal is really manipulative. How can I keep my boyfriend addicted to me and detach him from that gal? Please help!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2010): First off, tell him how you feel about her, second, how you feel about him talking to her. If you are his gf, as you say, you have every right to set boundaries with him, such as anything up to and including you not wanting him to talk to her or see her at all. If he can't respect how you feel about him, and he would rather go behind your back like a little pussy, then he doesn't deserve you. You can't make somebody love you(or addicted to you), you can only be yourself. If he doesn't love you for who you are, then he's not right for you. No matter how manipulative she is, he has every opportunity to avoid her, but seems to like giving her his time, instead. So tell him you want his little game to stop, behind your back, or you're leaving him. Tell him he only gets this one chance to stay, but he isn't getting another.. Be firm about it, and then if you catch him sneaking around again, behind your back, he goes bye-bye.
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