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How can I get some answers out of him?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Breaking up, Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 May 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 27 May 2008)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid,

A little over a month ago, my first boyfriend broke up

with me after we spent seven weeks together. He didn't

give a reason, and he's not even the one who told me

that he wanted to end things (he had two of our friends

do it for him). Naturally, I was DEVASTATED. I've been

trying to just forget about him and move on, but I just

can't stand not knowing why he broke up with me; not

knowing what I did wrong. I really, really, REALLY want

to know so that I can make sure that, whatever it is

that I did, I don't do it the next time I get into a

relationship. But the thing is, he won't even LOOK at

me! I know that we probably won't be able to get back

together, but...I wouldn't mind at least being FRIENDS

with him. How can I get him to talk to me...and how can

I get some answers out of him?

~Hung up over Hunter~

View related questions: broke up, move on

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008):

Hi hun,

I know how you are feelings. When i was your age I went through the same ordeal...my first boyfriend and I had been together for a little longer than you and Hunter, but he broke up with me without any warning or reason. Sometimes guys who get into a relationship quickly can feel smothered, as in you are spending too much time together. Or, they can feel that they just really don't want to have a girlfriend.

Either way, you shouldn't let yourself get too worked up over this, okay? I went months wondering if he would ever explain to me what i had done...turns out, he never did. He was stubborn and wouldn't speak to me but a year and a half later, he decided that he wanted me back!! This could be a possibility dear. he may not realize what he had until later.

Having said all of this, please realize that guys don't have to have a reason to break up with their girls sometimes. they may not want to be friends at all and most young guys are just plain stupid sometimes...ha. But you should just make sure to be yourself cause you will find someone who will love you for you and appreciate you no matter what mistakes you make!! He may come back, he may not...but you may be better off not knowing.

Best of wishes sweetheart! Keep us updated.

p.s. if you really want to talk to him, give him some time. Don't try for a while and THEN, call or text him and simply ask how he is doing and say that you simply want to ask him a question...say "I am not trying to change your feelings or anything, but i was just wondering if you could give me a little insight into why our relationship failed...just so I can know what to do and not to do to keep a relationship going."

hope this helps

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