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male
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anonymous
writes: dear cupidi would like to know how can a boy who is shy get more comfortable around girls without going red and speak clearly, as it am shy and not confident around girls and plus the fact that every girl and sometime the boys say im ugly and i will never get a girl, is there any way to get over this and not be called ugly and get my self a gf????? help from girls will greatly be helpful
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male
reader, Forthosewhohaveheart  +, writes (9 August 2010):
Hey look bro i used to be the same why until one day i saw this incredibly beautiful girl rightt.. and what do you know the next week we are hanging out.. talking and she likes me a lot ! im amazed on how this girl ended up liking me .. man all u gotta do is ignore those assholes and move on man. be urself and one day ull find a girl who will give u the confidence u neen trust me. Hope this helps
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2010): i guess as, as a lot of other people have said, confidence comes with time, but the absoloute key to condfidence is to be yourself- stop fretting about what you do around girls and just act completely normally- let your personality change you not you change you personality
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male
reader, WhiteMage  +, writes (24 September 2009):
Hey buddy. I dont care what the other ppl say. I am only 13 but I wont sit here waiting the girl I want to find me. Just the next morning , wake up , screw the other ppl and start talking to a girl. The other ppl will probably say bull***ts . Ignore them. Be polite to the girl and her friends. Make sure she has not a bf. Wait till she opens a conversation after your "hi". Then ask her going out. She will say yes (yeah she will cause you will be confident). Go get her ON TIME (its very important). Open a conversation that you both like. When you finish if you feel great (yeah you will) kiss her slowly(no i dont mean on her cheek). Dont be shy. You are 16 !!! So grow up buddy, and grow some balls with ya !!! Hope you will . If you do let me know (and remember yeah you will).
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male
reader, ForTehLulz  +, writes (20 October 2008):
Ok first off im around the same age as you, I am shy around girls the same way u described, but im pretty confident that im attractive. you have one of 2 problems with your situation, either A you have low self asteem therfore no matter what you look like you will think your ugly or B unfortunately you might be, BUT I always see far less attractive guys than myself with beautiful girls -- looks are NOTHING if you can get the confidence down nothing can touch you - ever
Good Luck
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2008): hi , i have the same problem but im complimented on my looks. when girls come up to me i go like u. people say that confidence grows but ive always been shy and im 16 now
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2008): im 16, i get told i am a good looking boy, i get looks from girls when i walk through town, im one of those emo boys, well, the emo hair, and the clothes, i wear what i want because it makes me feel more comfortable, YET, i still am incredibly shy, i havent had a g.f in ages because i find myself unable to talk to girls. but all i can suggest, with the ugly thing, is that people will say that to you, either as they are jelous, or they are ashamed of their own looks and want to make someone feel down so they dont feel as bad, its highly pathetic, but i am with you on the whole shy thing, it isnt easy to talk to a girl mainly when they look beautiful and there with their friends, you just have to wait, and it will come to youif you go looking for it, it wont be the one for you
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2008): Hello, if you are reading this just know that it doesnt matter what others say because you know what is inside of you and you probably have more self confidence than others, you just have not had it come out yet, and thats fine. yes, i am a girl, and yes i look like a model and am very confident, but when i was younger kids picked on me and its so hard because it breaks your confidence down...but you have to know that it really is not as much as you make it out to be...and just remember, there IS that special girl out there just for you :)
so dont rush on anything, and do what you want, never hold back!
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): i have very low confidence so i cant really help there, but the ugly thing, there aint no such thing as ugly, who decides what is ugly and what isnt? people who make those judgments are shallow and have poor personalities
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2008): I know how you feel mate, i still have the same problem. but from what i know about confidence just see if you can reply in your head with: 'so?', it actually helps to block out them thoughts of: she's just gonna laugh at me, she'll just walk away and go talk to that person, ill just get ingored ect.
So i can understand what ur going through, i mean i absolutly hate myself, but, so?...
If you see were i'm coming from, its all a matter of blocking out what other people might think of you, im not good at this yet, but i hope you will, and the word 'Ugly' and related words should be removed from the dictionary The Dont Exist!.
Good luck mate :-)
Nick, 16
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female
reader, mrs0  +, writes (16 January 2007):
 hi there.. well i used to have this problem, i had to find inside what i want out of life first, befor boys etc.. my inner beauty, look deep, go baby steps to goals in life, if you start to feel great on the inside!.. it starts to radiate on the outside.. just concentrate souly on ya self, block unwanted comments out, look in the mirror, practise chat up lines, youll soon find that ya giggle at ya self.. keep doing this...i used to pretend the person opposit me had a big wart on the end of their nose... id smile on the inside, n after a while found the confidence to speak to ppl without going red, believe in you alone...
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female
reader, Shelley-jade +, writes (16 January 2007):
 To not be so shy you have to be confident. You need to feel comfortable in the clothes you wear, pretty much how you hold yourself. Take one step at a time, walk round the clothes shops try loads of stuff on to see what you feel comfy in. Also try different hair styles. You will be surprised in what you can find, as well as feel a new you coming together.
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female
reader, NenaUnique  +, writes (16 January 2007):
 you might need to take some notes buddy
ok if your style in clothes are way behind then BRING THEM UP!! lets see your hair style..lets see..if its long to your shoulder CUT IT!! if its way to short almost bold LET IT GROW A COUPLE OF INCHES!!if its a couple on inches DO SOMETHING WITH IT! wear gell make it spiky up or spiky back.or if you dont like the idea then get a shape up..make sure you dont smell..useful tools: deodorant and colone ;)
Dorky shoes?GOT TO GO! wear air forces if your into the urban things or wear DCs if you are into skaters.
when you're around Da Girlas don't talk to them like you just seen a ghost talk to them like if they waz one of the boys..dont talk about who do you like and bla bla bla let them bring the subject up :)thats what we do..anyways so yea just talk to them like they are one of the boys..be like "what up?" but make sure they want to talk to you..well if you need ANY more advice feel free to private message me...
oh and please if you do any of the ABOVE plz write to me :)
*ValEria*
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female
reader, Auntie Bird +, writes (16 January 2007):
Look darlin i am sure you are not ugly any way looks are skin deep dont ever let anyone tell you that your a mnger
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male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (16 January 2007):
 You still sound quite young, and as you mature you will find that your confidence grows with you. I never had much confidence when i was younger, espessially around females. But as i have got older and wiser my confidence levels have grown up with me.
You are not ugly, and don't listen to the boys and girls who say that, they are just being mean.
Participate in some group activites, like soccer, tennis, or whatever you fancy, and a good social life will follow this. And in time you confidence will grow.
Good luck
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2007): I'm an ugly person and i have a boyfriend!!
Just because people say your ugly it doesnt mean
you are! Your probably good looking and people go for
different styles.
It really doesnt matter what people are on the outside
anyway its whats on the inside. If you be confident around girls, talk to them, compliment them on their hairstyles and clothes and stuff and they will begin to like you.
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female
reader, appygal81 +, writes (16 January 2007):
 When i was younger, i was a very shy girl. in the first grade i hid in the coat closet for the first week of school, thats how shy i was. It took me quite awhile to come out of my shell. I was probably 13 or so. Showing my horse is what made me become more conident. the more confident i got the better i was in my social life as well as my horse show career. no i am not saying go buy a horse (however it is a good sport for underconfident men as it is primarily a female oriented sport)im just saying find something your good at and confident with, that will eventually trickle into your social life. some girls will recognize you for being good at what ever you do. Does this make since? confidence comes from within. do what makes you confident with yourself and your social life is sure to follow.
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reader, cd206 +, writes (16 January 2007):
 Confidence will come as you get older. I get the feeling from what you write that you're still very young. You're not ugly, whatever they say, you're probs just not mainstream good looking. There's someone for everyone believe me. Just look around you. I'm sure you see loads of ugly people with boyfriends or girlfriends. Which means it all comes down to the confidence. When I was younger I found that thinking myself confident made a BIG difference. Just remember the people who call you ugly are only making the most of the only years they will be important. Once you leave school none of that rubbish matters anymore.
CD
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