A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupids, advice please cos I'm hurting :( My boyfriends 33 I'm 23. I deleted my Facebook cos he was always jealous when old friends tried adding me etc. To cut a long story short he is very jealous and controlling. Anyways when I was on Facebook we had arguments due to the fact he never replied to my messages if he was online, even if he knew I was in the library so whatever I wanted to ask him, id have to go outside to call him. He also had sent messages to 3 different girls telling them how pretty they were n he wanted to chat n stuff which hurt me, he promised to never do it again.Anyways I opened my Facebook after about 3 weeks today because it was a cousin's birthday and I didnt have her new number, and he's been commenting on girls pics who are I'm bikinis, sexy poses etc..."wow this is amazing".. Etc etc. This is not about me being insecure, not about about him looking at a hot girl, it's about him doing something he would never accept from me, I.e. Commenting on them, and breaking promises he knew meant a lot to me.Im really hurt and angry atm, and my first instinct is to leave, there's a lot more than this, but basically I have given this man everything. However I do love him, too much for my own good :(. What would you do if you were me? :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2011): "However I do love him, too much for my own good :(. "
I would try to stop loving him asap. He is no good. He is a liar and if he isn't already cheating on you he will at some point.
Take care.
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (7 February 2011):
 "Am I making a big deal over nothing here?"
No you are right to be upset. He's acting completely disrespectful and selfish. I'd dump him and move on if I were you. I'm sure you can do much much better.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2011): Your instinct is right. Leave this guy.
He is controlling and treats you the way he does because he assumes every other guy is just like him: a hypocritical opportunitst.
The silver lining for you is that most guys are not like this. Leave him and find a better one.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi guys thanks for your answersYes I know the fact he is a hypocrite has made me mad, but what hurts more than anything is he broke my trust, made me feel unimportant and disrespected when I thought he cared, he'd spent two hours the previous night telling me I was his world and I was the best thing that had ever happened to him.... I find that hard to believe when he's lusting over half naked girls behind my back. Looking is one thing, but commenting on them? I find it put of order! Am I making a big deal over nothing here?
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (6 February 2011):
Sounds like this guy is very over-the-top controlling. He's made it very clear that he's very hypocritical and that he's not going to change, so if this behavior hurts your feelings (and it would hurt most people's) you should leave and find someone who isn't a controlling hypocrite. Adding old friends is hardly an offense against your relationship, but browsing friend's photos and telling them how hot they look in bikinis is pretty over the top. He doesn't sound like good relationship material, you should find someone who is.
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A
female
reader, amandab +, writes (6 February 2011):
he is controling,
he is trying to isolate you, taking you away from facebook
you doing something that pleases him but not you and it is unreasnoble
he has the insecurties and will keep controling you if you let him...eventulally he will bring you down so much there is nothing left to give, one person should not be doing all the giving. read a book called why charming men make dangerous lovers!
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