A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i got a question for you all..i have been in a long distance relationship for 12 months. 3 months ago my girl cheated on me with another ..he was an old boyfriend..she said it was the distance and booze that helped her do it..she said that in will not happen again.we got to see each other for the first time..2.5 months ago.i forgave her and allowed her to come visit me.she did.everything is working out fine ..but for one thing her daughter doesnt like me..and her daughter got into arguement with me..today..i told her daughter that i loved her mom and the daughter said you may think she loves you..but its a joke..my mother still has a old boyfriend and another one who is in uniform serving our country. she said hahaha..shes fooling you..she told me..my girlfriends daughter doesnt like me, because my girls past boyfriends verbally and physically abused her..i dont abuse her in anyway..so i called and told my girl about what her daughter said and my girlfriend started to cry and said iam not seeing anyone ..then she told me your putting me in the middle of your argument.,my girl said this ..i kinda thought this was wierd..i told my girl you need to be her mother and not try to be her buddy always..my girlfriend said there is no one ..but i felt in my gut something is going on. i told my girl then why did your daughter tell me about those two guys..my girl friend said my daughter doesnt like you because she thinks you might turn out like those other guys..i told my girl is it true do you have these guys coming around ..my girl said no and continued to cry..i let my girlfriend know i believed her but in my gut why would her daughter, who is an adult tell me this..my girlfriend isnt working now but helps out donating clothing ..today she did this..my girl told me her daughter needs counseling ..but i feel there is something going on ..could there be something going on since the daughter said her old boyfriend lives in the same area of town..mygirl is going to move up with me..in 3 months..do you think this is a good idea or do you think she is seeing another guy while i am waiting ???she did say the reason she cheated before was due to distance,and being lonely..could this be happening again.????my girl is use to the bad kinda guy who treats her bad..iam not that kinda guy ..i treat her great.
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cheated on me, long distance Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwe are 2500 miles apart..in this long distant relationship..
A
female
reader, Bealynne  +, writes (30 July 2009):
It seems to me that there are several issues that need to be addressed in this relationship.
Firstly, I would try to talk to both your girl and her daughter together and try to establish which one is telling the truth. If it is the daughter who is trying to put you off due to her Mother's previous abusive relationships - you are going to have to assure her that you will indeed look after her Mother and that her days with abusive partners are over.
If it turns out that the daughter is telling the truth and your girl is indeed seeing an old boyfriend then you are going to have to ask yourself if even when she moves in with you will she be "settled". A relationship can only survive if there is trust on both sides, so you have to be 100% certain in your own mind and heart.
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