A
female
age
30-35,
BROOKE*
writes:HI, I was hoping someone could give me some advuce. Me and my partner have been together for 4 years and have a beautiful son, I really love him but I feel like he doesn't love me anymore. We were very very close but I feel like I can't talk to him anymore. We still have sex ut it's not the mind blowing sex we used to have, it's more of a chor. I am overweight since having our son and I am lacking confidence and I don't think he understands that I don't think he's cheating I just don't think I'm what he wants anymore. I have put myself on a diet and exercise programme which seems to be working and I hve already lost 9lbs and trying to make him fall in love with me again. I don't want to lose him I just want to feel special again. He works from home and doesn't even come to bed with me, he follows about an hour later. Everytime I try to be sexy or come onto him he says he's tired. Any advice?
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female
reader, youcant loose what you never had! +, writes (13 September 2007):
First its great that you’ve already lost weight and that you should be proud of. Try telling him how you feel the thing is having a baby does put your sex life on hold or doesn’t feel the same the best advice I can give you is keep on your diet and get to the size you want to be not the size you want him to notice you. Then you’d feel more confident and could wear something a little sexier you could try and buy some toys for your sex life to try n spice things up a bit. The simple thing is if he says he’s tried don’t have sex at all and don’t make it a chore sex should be fun once you’ve ruled sex off the manue he’s bound to ask why and then you can open up and tell him why your worried if this man really loves you which I’m sure he does he will understand after all the last thing he’s going to do is cheat when he’s got you pregnant he’s got a responsibility to you and your child.Talk to him it will help tell him how you feel and refuse sex with him until he listens! X
A
male
reader, duce00  +, writes (28 August 2007):
 I remember this from when I was married. Heres a couple things that can help.
#1 Make a date night: Go out, stay in, rent a hotel room, it doesnt really matter. Just spend some kid free time together and do some re-connecting. Sex is great only if it feels natural, dont make it feel pressured like your on a schedule.
#2 take care of yourself: It sounds like your doing this allready. Get some exercise, do somthing that makes you feel good about yourself again.
#3 TALK!! You need to bring this out in the light of day and stop letting it eat at you.
Hope this helps,
Duce00
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A
male
reader, daglish  +, writes (19 August 2007):
 You are already special. Its just that you have lost yuor raw confidence and libido after your first kid. This is absolutely know and shouldnt pose a threat to your relationship. The other thing is that you are assuming too much and reading alot into very small matters.Simplicity is best ord i can use to describe a long life sexual life. Try out other forms of sex rather than penetration you will be surprised. You can just masturbate infront of eachother or simply massage yourselves just to break the monotony.
One last thing you should know is that when kids come into a family, they turn out to be the most important reasons for a wife to stick to her husband. T his means SEX is not as important for the marriage the way it used to be before.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2007): i say he thinks your just not you ever since you had a baby maybe you could tell him whats bothering you and if he dosent get the feeling he use to get when you were dating maybe relive those days and maybe hell have that feeling again and you well have your sex days back on track!
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A
female
reader, lovexgurl19 +, writes (16 August 2007):
 Maybe you two should sit down and talk about it. Like one day he comes from work fix him something special, and end it with some intimacy, and just put some soft music. And just love him, and write him little cards, like i love you, things like that. Or say you miss the way he did a certain thing. Try to get him back, dont lose him, and fight for him. The best excercise is sex, and you lose a lot a weight that way.
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