A
female
age
36-40,
*irly123
writes:I am in a relationship of two and a half years. I love my boyfriend, but I need to start being more independent. I don't have many friends, mostly because I just don't have time to socialize with school being a big priority. I am also a bit socially awkward and get shy when it comes to hanging out with new people. Who knew that making friends would be so difficult. I have friends in a few of my classes, but outside of school, we don't really get together because we are all busy and live kind of far from each other. It's pathetic, but I always find myself getting upset over him making plans with his friends. But he rarely wants me to join in with him. It's just frustrating because the little time that I have, I spend it all towards him. We live together and he's my best friend, but it's just hard when he wants to spend the night with friends, but I: a)don't have any friends to spend time with and am stuck studying all night orb)want to do something with him but doesn't feel like he wants to do the same with me, but will go out of his way to spend it with his mates. Please help me! I want to start putting my life as my top priority instead of waiting around for him to realize that he would like to spend time with me.Any suggestions?
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female
reader, Battista +, writes (17 March 2011):
What do you study? Are you working as well?I have also done a postgrad degree, which I am guessing is what you might be doing, and there were always plenty of talks/groups having meetings, which are almost always followed by drinks or coffee. These are a really good way of meeting someone. Obviously that is just a guess as I don't know what you're studying.I have been in a similar situation to this though, OP. I can tell you from experience that it is important to learn to rely on people other than your bf for company and socialising. You do have to force yourself to do it though, but it gets easier the more you do it. Email some of your classmates and see if people want to go for a meal. Just see what happens. You won't regret it, and you will probably find it makes things much easier for you at home as you will start gaining some independence.
A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (17 March 2011):
 What GeeGee said is true. Many guys don't appreciate what they have till it's gone. I guess that goes for a lot of people in general too.
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A
female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (17 March 2011):
 The funny thing about some guys, is the more you do create a life for yourself, and start to have fun, friends, hobbiesplaces to go, people to see things to do, the more they suddenly want to be with you and don't like it that you are going out and moving on without them.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (17 March 2011):
Make plans with those friends. So what if it's inconvenient. Even if it's something like study plans you're making excuses why you can't do it. Knock it off with the excuses.
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