A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my first boyfriend and i split up about 2 years ago and i got talking to him the other day and he told me that he loves me and he always has but the problem is he has been dating this girl i no since we split. He wants me back and i want him back but it will cause loads of trouble what can i do?
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female
reader, elsie +, writes (24 March 2007):
 sounds to me like hes using you and probably all the other girls hes known as some sort of human stepping stone.why is it men cant have a break?they seem so scared of being on their own.tell him to see if he can spend a few weeks on his own.talk to him over the phone but realise that he will have to deal with the fall out from this other poor girl.just remember if he can do this to her after 2years he can do it do you.are you going to base your whole future with this guy on what sounds like a chance meeting?why didnt he come forward before or try and track you down.sounds like a bit of a CHANCER all round.think long and hard.just because he wants to jump in doesnt mean you have to aswell.
A
female
reader, AskRosie +, writes (21 March 2007):
 Ok. Maybe you ought to see him in the privacy of your own home. Please play hard to get and don't go on to him. Boy's should make the first move, not you. Please don't trust him a lot at the beginning, make conditions, trust him more throughout the relationship. If he values you he will not complain about the conditions. You went out with him once and you split up. If your scared don't tell anyone. Tell him to keep it a secret to. If he valuse you then he will keep it a secret to.
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A
female
reader, Midge +, writes (21 March 2007):
 Being confused is not always a bad thing, it means you are thinking about things through. If you can be certain this boy has definately finished with this other girl, then if you really feel that strong for him, there is no harm giving it another go.
Just take things slow! Make sure he's not on the rebound because he has just come out of another relationship, so you need to be sure he's not wanting you back simply because he doesnt want to be alone.
Make the best choice for you! Dont worry about what other people think!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni spoke to this lad again lastnight he was on the phone to me for ages and we talked i didnt lead him on but he is determind he wants me back and has already finished with his girlfriend. He is coming home in easter and wants to meet up with me i realy want to meet up but im scared incase someone sees us together and get the wrong idea eventho he isnt with his girlfriend no more i need some help quick and i realy want to be with him i have just realised how much i miss him and i cant stop thinking about him and all my friends say i should go for it but i need a bit more advice.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2007): Walk away and keep away. You two split up and he is with someone else. Please do not be the reason for them to split up. He could be saying this so he can have his cake and eat it. Some people love the thrill of having two people on the go at the same time. Just walk away, meet some who you do deserve and forget about him.
Take care
xx
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A
female
reader, Dear fuzz +, writes (19 March 2007):
well a female, you say you want to get back with your ex but clearly there was a problem in your relationship for you to split up in the first place, I think maybe you should let him deal with any issues in his present relationship and then if that involves him breaking up with the current girlfriend , you should take one step at a time if you want to get back with him maybe dating first of all, not jumping straight back in where you left off 2 years ago as 2 years is a long time to be apart people and habits change.
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A
female
reader, Midge +, writes (19 March 2007):
An ex is an ex for a reason. This probably isnt what you want to hear but its the unfortunate truth.
You split two years ago and he started dating straight away. If your relationship meant that much to him, he would have taken a little time out of the dating scene, and he didnt, he just jumped right back in there. Now he is probably bored with the girlfriend and time for a change in scenery. Thats where you come in!
Dont let him play you like that. There are so many players out there, dont be played like that!
I went out with a guy for 4 years who constantly did that to me. I didnt realise it at the time because I thought I loved him. Only to find out that he wasnt only playing me, but about half a dozen other girls too.
Its hard to distance yourself from someone that you care so deeply about, but you will set yourself up for a whole bunch of heartache if you take the bate and go back to him.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (19 March 2007):
 I woulden't persue him while he is tied into another relationship. I also think it was wrong of him to express his love for you, especially as he has been dating this other girl for the last two years.
If he love's you and always has then he should do the decent thing and tell his girlfriend its over. Until then i woulden't give him any signs that you are interested.
Good luck x
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A
female
reader, AskRosie +, writes (19 March 2007):
Hi, How do you know that this boy isn't playing you? If he says he wants you back then he will dump his girlfriend but if he is just tired of the relationship he will play away. Tell him that if he wants you he will have to dump his girl. At first see each other privately, then after a few weeks come out. If you feel guilty talk to a trusted grown up about this and see what they would in your shoes.
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