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*lsie

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1234Next > [4 pages, 138 answers]

How do I stay gone from him once I'm gone?? I keep coming back to him as I miss the good things that have been.

Q.   I have been in an mostly emotional- sometimes physically abusive relationship for 7 years. We have 3 kids together- I have left this man at least once a year b/c I get to the point where I am so sick of being called a b____ and fat____ or dumb or ...

A.   4 September 2008: im going through exactly the same thing as you.really you can only go when you are ready.remember though that the longer we stay the more they damage you and bring you down and every day is wasted living with the burden of worry.in the end its the ... (read in full...)

Lots of signs by boyfriend is cheating. What should I do?

Q.   I'm a 22 year old female, my boyfriend of 3 years is 27. I need help figuring out if he has been cheating on me. He a tow truck driver and works all the time, the problam is when i go to my parents he doesn't answer the phone most of the time i call ...

A.   16 June 2008: sorry honey but he sounds like a cheat to me.my ex who i have a son with done exactly the same to me.he went to the "shops" one night and came back smelling of perfume.the trip that usually takes 1hr took 2half hrs?stuck in traffic (yeh right)!if it ... (read in full...)

It's his ex. And it's his ex. And it's his ex again. I don't know what to do.

Q.   Argh, I am so confused and there probably is not answer, but maybe someone can share something? I began dating my boyfriend casually, we live in separate cities and so communicated alot through email and sending things in the mail and stuff. He wa...

A.   16 June 2008: first of all i think that the last answer from anonymous was brill.i only wish id been strong enough.what is all boils down to is self-respect.she was sooo right.make the boundaries.i soo much wish id not got involved and fell in love with my b/f ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is still in love with his ex, but wants to be with me, what should I do?

Q.   Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 5 months now, he was previoulsy married for 6 years with 2 little girls. He is in the process of finalizing the divorce in which he filed for but he is still in love with his ex. They didn't get ...

A.   16 June 2008: although your boyfriend is being honest i think he was tactless saying he still has feelings for his ex.he sounds like he needs a bit of space.be wary that he doesnt start using you as a counsellor.im in a very similar setup its just my b/f runs to ... (read in full...)

I'm a tired, sad mess

Q.   This is really hard for me to admit, but i think im falling into depression or something. I'm just young, but am in a long relationship and things seem to be getting harder and harder. the good times are so good, but the bad times can be awful. H...

A.   15 May 2008: i think most of us remember the teenage angst and intensity of those years.i remember looking back now and thinking the world would cave in when my b/f finished with me.i laugh now and cant believe how strong those feelings were at the ... (read in full...)

Do I follow my heart or do I just do what my family wants me to do?

Q.   Ok, it has been six months since I talked to my ex. He called me last night and told me that he regrets letting me walk out of his life and that he would do anything to have be back in it. I still have fellings for him and he still has them for me. ...

A.   15 May 2008: ive been in this posistion several times with a few partners and it was quite excruciating.it really hurts because you feel like you family should be there no matter what.i have realised to keep quiet now and not tell my family most of whats going ... (read in full...)

How do I get closure from a relationship if the person has disappeared?

Q.   How do I get closure from a relationship if the person has just disappeared? I don't really want to call him, text him, or email him ... I just want answers but don't know how to get them. I know I will never get the answers I want to hear. I ...

A.   3 March 2008: i totally understand how you feel.one word for these men an that COWARD.they are very immature and they NEVER change.you cling on in the desperate hope there will be a breakthrough,honey there never will be.all you are doing,just like i did,is ... (read in full...)

His Ex won't leave us alone.

Q.   His ex won't leave us alone - Harassing phone calls etc to my home and work. Update- I received a further nuisance call tonight from my boyfriend's ex wife. I rang my boyfriend to tell him and he also had a hang up call 5 seconds before I called ...

A.   19 February 2008: hi, There i once had a few nuisance calls from my b/fs ex. I sat there racking my brains and i never used to speak. I don't believe in giving them the satisfaction that its getting to you. Anyone else who rings will say hello first anyway.i plucked... (read in full...)

Help before monday please.

Q.   I have been seperated from my ex for a year. he has stopped paying maintainence and now he wants to take our 21 month old daughter out with his new girlfriend (who i do not know) do i have the right to stop him from taking our daughter out....

A.   15 February 2008: i just read the first answer to your question and things may have changed?anyway about 3yrs ago i was in the same set up as you.my ex and i went to mediation to sort out access visits etc.i bought up the subject of maintenance because my ex could ... (read in full...)

3 yrs of dating, and suddenly he hangs up the phone on me. Why?

Q.   I've been dating this guy for almost 3 years, but here's the problem. He went to his country which is Haiti, we talked a couple of times over the phone, but all of a sudden after Thanksgiving I have never been able to speak with him again. When I ...

A.   2 January 2008: obviously the mans a coward doesnt he feel that at least he owes you an explanation?maybe there was more to it when he went to haiti in the first place?whatever the reason its obviously something the guy knows is gonna upset you.easier said than ... (read in full...)

No contact for 2 months then I get a message; Merry Christmas. I love you. What does this mean?

Q.   I broke up with my bf almost 2 months ago, but he wanted to remain friends...we just basically needed a break, but he slowly lost contact with me and began ignoring me...then he moved in with his new gf...its Christmas and I haven't heard from him ...

A.   2 January 2008: dont read anymore into it.just throw the message away and clean it out of your head.i know the feeling when your worried or down you look at the message and read so much more into it than is there.the main thought that springs to my mind is action ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend runs to his ex when we have problems and I'm sick of it!

Q.   my boyfriend keeps running between me and his ex, when he has problems with me he runs to her and vice verse. I told him to get lost as three is a crowd and i deserve better, do you think i made the right choice, i love and miss him too much for ...

A.   2 January 2008: yes darling you definetly made the right choice here.he was a coward and sorry but these sort of men will always run to someone else when the going gets tough!shes convenient and obviously still likes him.my fella does the same and i get angry with ... (read in full...)

Is it wrong of me to tell my ex to stop coming to see the kids, when he does nothing for them anyway?

Q.   My ex and i have been broken up for almost a month, Three days ago he moved in with his new girlfriend, leaving me and his kids at his mothers house. Right now we have nowhere else to go and i am trying to find an apartment, but anyway he comes and ...

A.   28 November 2007: right now you are both feeling very raw.he sounds like a bit of a coward and id guess he knows too well that hes doing wrong.tell him from the kids point of view that no sooner have they grasped the fact that hes arrived than its time for him to ... (read in full...)

My guy is almost perfect...except he still hasn't divorced his wife! Am I wasting my time?

Q.   Me and my guy have lived together for 8 years and he is almost the perfect guy he supports me and my children, we have never spent the night apart if he is not working we are spending time together.My problem is that he has not divorced his wife am ...

A.   17 July 2007: very strange you need perhaps to give a bit more info?1year maybe 2 but 8 years? no way.is he trying to keep some bond together with his ex? you say that he spends all available time with you perhaps to convince yourself that he can be trusted? what ... (read in full...)

He still talks to his ex-girlfriend.

Q.   He still talks to his ex-girlfriend. I know for a fact he hasn't told her that we are together and we've been seriously together for 2 and 1/2 years. I think he still has feelings for her and he still calls her all the time. They talk on the ...

A.   11 July 2007: hi there i know exactly how you feel.im out of the woods now but my fella and his ex,they have a son,used to be in touch alot.it wasnt just about their child it was other crap too.he really rubbed my nose in it and unless this guy has got the sense ... (read in full...)

How do I allow him into my children's lives without feeling such hatred for him? Also, I don't want his girlfriend in my children's lives.

Q.   Hi I wanted some tips for coping with an ex-partner when he comes to see the kids, Its been 2 months since Ive thrown him out(for cheating) and even though I dont love him anymore, I hate it when he comes round I just feel such hatred for him and ...

A.   18 June 2007: your question bought back memories of my own situation.my ex was a cowardly weasel of a man.he cheated throughout my entire pregnancy and i went into labour 2months early from shock.you never really get over them cheating and believe me you have ... (read in full...)

He keeps running back to his ex girlfriend

Q.   Hi there i really need your help me and my boyfriend split up thursday, he keeps running back to his ex girlfriend but he's told me today he really loves me and wants me back and he wont let me move on and meet other lads what do i do????...

A.   18 June 2007: i know how you feel i was in a similar setup but the only solution after tons of heartache was to say stop or we are finished!and mean it.youve done nothing but splitup and get back together and unless you put an ultimatum now you will carry on like ... (read in full...)

He left me for an old meth addict who convinced him that our daughter is not his!! I'm still in love with him - what should I do??

Q.   I seriously feel like my life could be the next headline for the Jerry Springer Show. Seriously. My high school sweetheart, the father of my child left me about 10 months ago for a meth addict who is about 10 to 15 years OLDER than him. She had 2 ...

A.   8 June 2007: how very sad to be in this sort of situation.all round it seems that you were with a very very weak man.these sort of people have addictive personalities and latch to anything new and novel sometimes looking for a new drama and a new buzz because ... (read in full...)

We got in an argument, so he slept over his ex's house! He says nothing happened, but I don't kow what to believe!

Q.   hi all, question to all males out ter. can u please help me !!! why would my bf of 3yrs tell me he went out for dinner with an ex of his from years back, then went back to her place for more drinks but slept on sofa while she slept in her bed. Sin...

A.   8 June 2007: i think you are both playing games with each other.at first when i read your letter forgive me but i thought it was from someone alot younger.ive had the same and worse done to me by my b/f and had 2yrs of crap.him and his ex have a son.everytime we ... (read in full...)

I don't have a house or a family to support, so I send money to my ex to help her out, after all it IS my money to do with as I want!

Q.   Ok, heres the situation. I am still in touch with my first girlfriend from 25 years ago. She lives in another country and we see each other every couple years or so. She is divorced and has 2 kids. I dated her before she married and had the kids, ...

A.   8 June 2007: sorry to be so harsh but i cant believe how blind you are being?i cant think of any woman putting up with this.youve mentioned about not being married so you can do what you want financially then you say you are househunting together?surely thats a ... (read in full...)

We got back together after his cheating, but he still continues to chat sexily with others!!!!

Q.   I have gotten back with my boyfriend of two years. We went through a hard stage of cheating. He says he wants to be with me but behind my back he is messaging other women asking to 'start talking' with them. I even caught him telling his ex she ...

A.   8 June 2007: it sounds like hes addicted to getting a buzz out of contacting these other girls.he obviously has a very low opinion of himself and need to be constantly boosted by new or old girlfriends.he enjoys the adrenaline kick.this is probably too much of ... (read in full...)

I think he's living with someone else. He only calls me during weekends, or when he wants to have sex. How do I let him know I'm not happy with our relationship?

Q.   So ... I am going out with this guy ... he is nice ...few years older than me ... everything was great ... until I found out,he lives with someone. Anyway .. he told me they are breaking up .. and that she is moving out .. so I gave him a ch...

A.   30 May 2007: you need to get him to open up about what it is that he needs to sort out?i find it VERY odd that he doesnt ring you for these long stretches??you are not being desperate you deserve to be told the truth.can you get hold of him whenever you need ... (read in full...)

We decided to get back together, but his girlfriend takes forever moving out of the flat. How can I stop myself from being so upset about this?

Q.   My partner and I have recently got back together after a 12 month split. The problem was that he had started another relationship and although I knew of her existence he had told me that their relationship was all but over, he just needed to tell ...

A.   21 May 2007: oh dear warning bells going off big time.why on earth doesnt she know anything about you?thats the first glowingly obvious question?why has he kept quiet?sorry but why cant you text him?she might read his messages but their all but split up.if it ... (read in full...)

Husband has been having an internet affair for over 3 months!

Q.   Ok here goes...My husband who is in the middle of a midlife crisis has been having an internet affair for over 3 months now. I became aware of it when it was a month old. There was a lot of drama surrounding the affair and he told me that it was ...

A.   21 May 2007: you seem to be focusing a little too much on what she will think of him?does she know the full scoop?can she change him?why so many questions about her?isnt his disgusting behaviour bad enough as it is without worrying about whats in her ... (read in full...)

My husband still talks to his ex-mistress! He says there is no harm in it...Am i being unreasonable here to think otherwise?

Q.   My husband of 17 years has been having an affair since last summer, I found out in February and he hasn't seen her since. But they still phone each other up several times a week which I find really hurtful. I have asked him to stop ringing her and ...

A.   19 May 2007: he is utterly taking the mick out of you.has he always been this bossy and unreasonable?does he believe he can walk all over your feelings without and tact?give him one last chance to stop or you should leave.this is cruel by anyones standards.stop ... (read in full...)

My BF was emailing other women that he loved them, I have agreed to try again but I just don't know if I can trust him...

Q.   Hi, i recently found out that my boyfriend of a few years has been sending emails to other women telling them he loves them! We split up but have decided to try again, but i dont know if i can trust him anymore. Theres a weird atmosphere, but i dont ...

A.   17 May 2007: sounds like this weird atmosphere is probably more likely to be your gut feeling telling you to get rid of this guy!he sounds like a fool.how can he email women telling them he loved them?very sad.what was it all about?did he meet any of them?are ... (read in full...)

He is not good at keeping jobs, I'm pregnant and have two other kids. Should I let him move in with me?

Q.   hi,i'm 24 and 6mths pregnant. i also have 2 boys, 1 of 5 and the other 1 yr. my 1 yr olds dad (21yrs) left me 2 days after my nan had passed away now he wants me back saying he wants 2 be a proper dad and family, he doesn't work he has just started ...

A.   16 May 2007: hes got a bad track record and sounds like a weak guy.he cant live without you?yet hes dumped you 5times???i definetly dont advise that you go meeting anyone else this will only confuse matters more.sounds like your best be is perhaps to see if he ... (read in full...)

How do I keep my cool with him?

Q.   I met this lovely guy online, we got on really well and met up last weekend, I realised straight away that I had fallen for him in a big way and I think I got too serious too soon. I'm now worried that I have frightened him away. I have asked him to ...

A.   16 May 2007: its seems youve come across as too intense for him or maybe the guy wasnt as in to you as you were to him?this happens.hes made it quite clear that he feels uncomfortable with your question.hes been as direct as he can without hurting your feelings ... (read in full...)

I want to go back to the man I cheated on, but he has a new woman now. How do I get him back?

Q.   where do i start!! i cheated on my partner with a work colleague, which resulted in both us leaving our partners to be with each other, we now live together, for almost 17 months. i have always been in contact with my ex, but cant seem to let him ...

A.   16 May 2007: we all have an ex that we miss but thats is really all they are.honey it seems that these days good men are few and far between.you describe your fella as gorgeous?do you really want to sacrifice a man like this for someone who you descibe as a ... (read in full...)

Should I tell his girlfriend that he's sending me all these cute messages?

Q.   There's a guy... he's taken. I love him. I can't get him off my mind. He texts me loads outta the blue just to say " hey how are you?" and the other night he asked me to call him for a chat... He doesn't know I love him... I try to back...

A.   16 May 2007: definetly DO NOT tell his girlfriend youll open up a whole tin of trouble and you dont know how shell react?she could turn on you!have you thought of that?you are very young and what you are experiencing sounds like an intense crush.if he is as much ... (read in full...)

Are the nudie pics on his phone really normal?

Q.   is it normal for my boyfriend to masturbate watching tv, while i sleep beside him, is it normal for a man of 38 yrs old to have naked pictures of other women on his phone, is it normal for him to hide porn in our home. We are 3yrs together...

A.   16 May 2007: obviously you are not as asleep as he would seem to think?how rude to masturbate when youre right next to him!who are these other women on his phone?are they models etc then i wouldnt read too much into this.i guess a couple of pics arent goin to ... (read in full...)

He plays computers games until 4 am with friends! Should I be upset, and jealous?

Q.   Ok, I love my boyfriend very much and he loves me too. we have an apartment together and sometimes one of his friends and his brother comes over to play computer games. Once they get there that is all he does and I feel really left out and kinda ...

A.   15 May 2007: at least hes not off somewhere else.you know where he is hes not upto anything hes just having fun.as long as it doesnt interfere with any other aspects of your relationship then try and either join in or do your own thing.believe me there are a lot ... (read in full...)

Is it going to be awkward to have his ex in the limo?

Q.   I am going to my schools formal soon, and I'm really happy but nervous about one thing. My boyfriends ex is going too, actually with some of his friends that don't have dates, and we are all going to be in the same limo. Is that awkward or what? He ...

A.   15 May 2007: one idea might be to make sure you dont have too much alcohol and keep a clear head so that you can keep on top of things.just be civil and polite and rise above this situation.you are very young and its totally understandable.ask your guy to give ... (read in full...)

He broke up with me because his ex threatened that he couldn't see his kids, if he kept seeing me! What should I do?

Q.   i am a female of 24 and was till just a couple of days ago in a relationship with someone who has children from a previous relationship. he has ended things cos he ex keeps causing trouble and threating that he wont see his boys no more if he ...

A.   15 May 2007: yes i agree with the first answer unfortunate for you that you fell for this guy with baggage.i know ive been there and it hurts like hell.his ex has simply fallen apart and it must be so hard for her.i dont see that she is too blame for any of ... (read in full...)

Now that I've found someone new, my ex suddenly wants me back and cries every day because I'm not there...

Q.   hi i was in a relationship of almost two years in a half i broke up with him because he would lie and hang out with girls and never answer my calls and never write back to my text and then all the sudden everything was my fault its been 8 months ...

A.   15 May 2007: yes i agree with everyones answers!hasnt it taken rather too long to be sorry?as the saying goes "too little too late"!he is eaten up with jealousy.if he had any care in the world for you when he was with you why didnt he make amends then?i wouldnt ... (read in full...)

He signed himself up on a dating site and he's looking for singles adds in the papers. Is he looking to cheat on me?

Q.   My 30 yr. old boyfriend just built one of those interactive webpages were you can meet new people and add them to your list of 'friends'. Like everything he does and likes he has become kind of addicted to it, adding his pictures to the page (me ...

A.   14 May 2007: oh dear,i think hes getting a big thrill out of flirting with the idea of cheating.the fact that you said he becomes addicted to doing things hes interested in sounds like he has an addiction problem allround.i think you need to let go.sounds like ... (read in full...)

How can I get my ex to understand that his son doesn't want to see him???

Q.   My ex-boyfriend has been harassing me, accusing me of not letting him see our young son. I broke up with him because he was always drunk and had poor hygiene. However, my son does not want to see him, and says "Daddy is a bad man!" "Bad daddy...

A.   14 May 2007: the fact that you are quoting your son as saying"bad daddy"sounds like hes pretty young.there are so many considerations to take into account and you have to think this all through very carefully. my ex was an idiot and cheated,never gave me a penny ... (read in full...)

Just found he cheated when we were dating.. but do cheaters change after marriage?

Q.   My husband cheated on me (more than once) while dating me 2 1/2 yrs. I married him not knowing he had cheated during that time. Do you believe cheaters really can change and only cheat during dating but not cheat after marrying the person?...

A.   14 May 2007: 2nd reply.you are absolutely right theres no excuse for people cheating!just asking to see how his mind worked!pretty much the same as every guy who does it.pathetic and unforgivable.i know how you feel,i was 7months pregnant when i found out my EX ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend's ex hasn't been sending their son to school. Bf refuses to deal with it. What can I do?

Q.   i need some advice on an ongoing problem with my partner and his child from previous relationship.ive just sorted one crisis out{he was spending far too much time round his ex,s with the 14yr old being the excuse}this took 3yrs and basically drained ...

A.   14 May 2007: hi to country woman,just a few points about the problem i had with him spending too much time with his ex and his son before.although his son is perfectly able-bodied he used to spend 90%of the time there sitting on his backside on computer,getting ... (read in full...)

We will be getting married in Aug. but we have a slight problem he continues to converse with his ex!!!

Q.   What do you think i should do? We have been together for 3 1/2 yrs. We will be getting married in Aug. but we have a slight problem he continues to converse with his ex. Should we be getting married?...

A.   13 May 2007: as long as these conversations with his ex dont interfere with your relationship or infringe on your privacey then let it go.perhaps you need to elaborate on your question?... (read in full...)

Just found he cheated when we were dating.. but do cheaters change after marriage?

Q.   My husband cheated on me (more than once) while dating me 2 1/2 yrs. I married him not knowing he had cheated during that time. Do you believe cheaters really can change and only cheat during dating but not cheat after marrying the person?...

A.   13 May 2007: if you are going to stay in this marriage just be on your guard for similar circumstances cropping up like when he cheated on you before.have you thrased out why he did this when you were dating?horrible though it sounds maybe they were his last ... (read in full...)

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