A
female
age
51-59,
*indy4554
writes:Greetings everyone!! Well I've met what seems to be an incredible man 3 weeks ago and at first he seemed very into me. We went out to dinner twice and had a coffee the third time together. He said the nicest things to me, like "he'd never been intimidated by a woman before, that it felt like he was in a dream just sitting there with me, etc." Anyway, he hasn't called in over a week and maybe I'm just too needy and he's more secure and adult about relationships, I don't know. Should I take this as a hint that he isn't interested or should I continue to send a text message and or e-mail from time to time? I really want to get to know him better....Thanks
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female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (4 February 2008):
 I'm sorry to hear this. I think it was very nice of him to call you to explain. At least you know if was nothing you did or didn't do. I think you probably have a fair amount of respect for him too and now you have a measuring stick to gage your future dates.
Good luck to you!
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (4 February 2008):
 A man's point of view: he didn't reject you. Much to the contrary, he was honest in saying he felt like he was dreaming. I have the feeling that he was very much considering whether he would go back to his old girl, or he would take his chances with you. He had this in mind since the first date; his saying that she called him "that week" is a lie. He was more inclined for the other girl. But he was honest in telling you. I understand your pain, but, see the positive side: he respected you and didn't lead you on.
But then, there's another point to talk about. What does a woman do if a man seems very interested and doesn't call in a week or so? She waits. He may not want to look needy or clingy, or he may have things to take care of, or whatever. If he doesn't call in two or three weeks, then the woman moves on.
The man does the same if she said she would call him.
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A
female
reader, Cindy4554 +, writes (3 February 2008):
Cindy4554 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks 2 you all for your input....
Well, he "did the right thing" today and finally called explaining that an old flame whom he had a very serious relationship with 3 years ago has contacted him & they've been talking alot the past 6 days & have realized they still have feelings for one another. This is why he shyed away from me but atleast he had enough courage & was gentleman enough to tel me & not leave me hanging. Oh boy though, rejection is hard to swallow.
Thanks again...Cindy
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A
female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (3 February 2008):
Please write us all back because I for sure am interested in what happens. I'm kind of going through a similar thing. Part of me is thinking he isn't interested but I know in my heart that he is but the he too is intimidated by me, which he said.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2008): I don't think there is anything "immature" or "unadult" or "insecure" about wanting to hear from someone you enjoy speaking/being with. Sometimes, unfortunately, people want to make the other party feel bad to spark some emotional reaction (which is a good thing, just in the wrong way).
If you like this guy you already know what to do. Don't over analyze.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (3 February 2008):
 After three dates, I think he has formed an opinion of you.If he is interested, he would have contacted you.
You could send text or email and see his response and confirmed your feelings.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2008): I would take his not calling for over a week as a sign that he does not want to come off too needy....it may actually be a compliment that he wants to keep you around. I would sit tight another week and if you don't hear from him, call him. Don't text or email, pick up the phone, don't mention to him that you have not heard from him or thought he died or something needy and clingy and nagging like that, just be your happy self and act glad to be talking to him...ask him out to something specific, like an activity during the day....non date like and then see what he has to say. Good Luck....he said he was intimidated by you, so give him some space and then do as I suggest and he will see there is nothing to be afraid of where you are concerned....take things slooooowwww.
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