A
female
age
41-50,
*eather1235
writes:I became friends with a guy for almost 2 years whom I really enjoyed. He was kind and caring,we used to have conversations about his girlfriend and my failing relationship with my husband long story short I am going through a seperation and one night hanging out with my friend he kissed me. It was a surprise but tension had been building. Things greadually turned awkward but we just enjoyed the friendship so just kinda let it go. Fast forward 2 mo and things completely changed. He was initiating conversations with me at least 2 times a week just small things but all in all I felt like he genuinily cared for me so I let him in. the texts got a little more and more like cant wait to see you, come over etc... To bam nothing, we hung out this last week picked right back up.. At the end of the night he told me about this new girl he had met my heart sank. I have never felt so right with him and obviously just one sided.. Never would have ever thought he would just be so non caring about it especially since we spent nights together etc.. I was heartbroken. I in turn text him the next day just letting him know I would like him to stay away. He in turn told me he, liked me and wanted the best for me. I left it there with my heart. I really never would have thought he would hurt me like this we were so close and he was always the initiator of us talking I just feel foolish, please help me understand
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male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (14 July 2011):
 Attraction isnt created between two people by sharing stories of relationship issues ... u got stuck in friends zone and an implied one at best. There wasnt good communication between you two about intention and as a result, this happened. Good luck.
A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (13 July 2011):
 you were there for him when he needed a kind pair of ears to listen to his girlfriend problems. i think this put you in a friend zone and he probably did and still does love you to some extent as a friend. he went and found a girlfriend for the romantic/sexual side. i know you are feeling hurt/rejected/jealous/disappointed now but if you can just get over this and accept his decision you will find that this is not a bad thing - love comes in different forms, FRIENDSHIP is probably the most durable and long lasting variety. a friend can be for a lifetime, a relationship can be for a couple of years.
why did you both not let things develop further when you kissed though? when you said you 'kind let it go' - maybe a lack of communication at the time made him feel like you weren't really into him and vice versa?
x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2011): well, you are married so you're not free to start a real relationship with him. He was single so he was free to start a new relationship. He found someone who's also free.
why should he wait around for you if you're married?
maybe he was hoping that after the first kiss you would tell him of your plans to divorce your husband and be free to start a relationship with him. But you didn't. So why should he continue waiting around?
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