A
female
age
16-17,
anonymous
writes:Okay, Well Im 15, dating this 16 year old guy.My first time dating, hes been in previous relationships and I haven't.I had an accident and I wasn't able to leave the house for 6 weeks. Over those 6 weeks, things started getting a LITTLE weird with him and me. We never spoke as much on the phone or on MSN.I went out today to see some friends and he walked past on the opposite side of the road, he didn't say anything and pretended like he hadn't seen me.My friend went up to him and asked him why he did that because we haven't seen each other in 6 weeks and he said he had somewhere to be, but then he walked back towards me.He stayed with us for about 10-15minutes, but he didn't really speak a lot, but I could see him lookin at me from the corner of my eye.He then said he had to leave and as he was going he just said 'I have to go now' and left. No hug, nothing. We haven't kissed or anything so the only thing we have done is hugged, so I was only expecting a hug when he left.I got home and he was on MSN, so I asked him what is going on between us.And he said 'I don't know, all I know is things have flopped (failed)'.But he's the type of guy to try once and if it fails he gives up, he wouldn't make an effort twice..I'm still confused.I really do like him.A week ago he said he still likes be but things are not going the way they're supposed to.I really think it is because of my accident and because I didn't see him for 6 weeks.And I wont be seeing him for another 6weeks because he is going abroad and he is coming back in September, in time for school.What do I do?Thanks
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female
reader, DiovanLestat + ♥, writes (22 July 2008):
 You have had many responses, but the advice from the men is most interesting I think. They think he's a bit immature, maybe shy, and he didn't know what to do when you got sick. You say he had a relationship before, maybe he was shy then and then he got dumped. You like him, and you say you know that he still likes you, but easily gives up. Spirit of Iona is right when he says this relationship is gonna be a hell of a lot of hard work.
It's up to you babes, the ladies say dump him, but Virg, a shy young man, begs you over and over again not to give up. What's the hurry, you said he behaved badly, but you know he was looking at you. Forget about the relationship thing, but maybe you could give him a call and try for friendship again.
I must admit I have little experience with shy young men. Maybe he's just stupid and you should take the lead. Tons of advice, looking a both sides. It's up to you babes, you must do as you think right.
A
female
reader, louxxlouxx + ♥, writes (22 July 2008):
 I think you should move on from this relationship. You can't help that you had an accident and it sounds like he is throwing a tantrum and trying to blame you for it. He seems like he needs a lot of attention and it is not realistic for him to expect you to be there for him all the time when he isn't gonna be there for you - he didn't even come and visit you while you were recovering. If you stay with him he will only carry on with this childish behaviour when he gets back from his holiday.
Move on chick, find someone who isn't so immature x
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A
male
reader, TheVirg  +, writes (22 July 2008):
Don't break up with him!!! I have dont the same thing being stupid and scared. I have "walked on the other side of the street" because I was shy and too scared to come up to the girlfriend. It just sounds like you are new in a relationship... you havent even kissed. He sounds as if he just doesnt know what to do. give him a chance.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2008): he left you, in your time of need. this was the time you needed him the most, and he couldn't "hack" it. leave him alone girl!
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A
female
reader, DiovanLestat + ♥, writes (22 July 2008):
Dump him, he's treating you with no respect. If he didn't want to be with you, he should have contacted you and told you so, rather than ignoring you in public. If he can't treat you good when your sick, and can move on within 6weeks then he's no good and not the man for you. He's an idiot, find another guy who treats you right and gives you the respect and friendship that you deserve.
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A
female
reader, baby duck + ♥, writes (22 July 2008):
 Amen, Tisha.
Many of us females are always so quick to take the blame because we think that empowers us to change things and make it right (whereas blaming the other guy gives away all of our control to change a situation). But sometimes, it is the other person's fault and if they're going to refuse responsibility, the only thing left to do is walk away. Fine. Walk away. But don't get sucked into a vortex of doom, wondering what you could have done differently ... or being miserable in a state of confusion ... be mad because you have a right to be and then decide that he's not worthy of tying your shoe, let go of the anger and move on, baby!
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 + ♥, writes (22 July 2008):
 He sounds like he is very immature and has a lot of growing up to do. I'd chalk him up to experience, and move on. And quite frankly, I'd allow myself to feel angry at the way he'd treated me, instead of finding something else to blame. The accident that kept you at home isn't the reason for his appallingly bad manners.
So drop him and stop blaming yourself.
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A
male
reader, TheVirg +, writes (22 July 2008):
I really disagree with Jen86, dont dump him. Like I said, most of why he was being off with you seems to be that he is just shy, afraid and dosn't know what to do.
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A
male
reader, TheVirg +, writes (22 July 2008):
losing communication with you during your six week ordeal isnt that big of a deal, if he hadn't seen you in six weeks it can be hard to keep calling and talking over that time, hard to explain but I've felt it before. me and my girtlfriend broke up over the summer because we got together near the end of the school year and over the summer just didn't see each other enough, leading to not calling enough, untill she gave me a call to break up. We both still love each other but she has another boyfriend and it is too late. Im sure he still loves you.
walking on the other side of the street ignoring you may be because he dosent know how to approach you, especially when you are with your friends. It sounds like he is new at dating since you havent even kissed yet. the reason this is happening is that he is scared. This is also why he didn't give you a hug when he left.
I don't believe that he has lost his crush on you, so don't rush to conclustions and break up with him.
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A
female
reader, Jen86 +, writes (22 July 2008):
dump him. he's not worth the time and effort. He didn't come to see you when you were stuck at home and he didn't even hug you and ignored you when he did see you!
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