A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Please more than one person help me out! I need tons of advice !My ex is a compulsive liar and the guy I'm talking to, ill just call him my bf, is a player. And they're friendsWell in the beginning my boyfriend would text me all day long and call me at night and fall asleep on the phone with me . This would happen every night . I sent him a picture of me and he made it his background i know because he took a screenshot and sent it to me . Anyway everything was fine. Hes in the army so some times he has to go 4 days without talking to me . The last time he went away for 4 days we talked that night about how much we mised each other and he went 2 days after that without really texting me or calling me. And when he did I was upset and he said he was sleeping during the days. I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Next we wouldn't text dyring the day as much but he would call me at night until I went off to college. I went to a welcome week bash were there was dancing but i sat on the side with my new friend a girl, and I stayed out to late so I texted him saying I was to tired to talk. The next daycmy ex calls me saying things like your bf has another gitl, he's about to get married, he's always with her but said he needed a break from her. ( me and him having been talking everyday, non stop, sleeping on the phone together for 3 months). Anyway the next day I called my bf and told him about my ex calling and he was upset saying I'm playing him and stuff which he should know I wouldn't do. I see why it seemed fishy to him because we always talk and i told him i was too tired too. So he said fine ill return the fav. He ignored me for 2 days and i cried .and when i talked to him the next day he said he didnt do anything, he just chilled and that hes not me. I told him i didnt do anything. Long story short we made up. Anyway the day we made up it was early in the afternoon and he said hed call me back. Usually when he says that he text me in the meantime, but he didnt and his phone calls are getting later and later . He use to call me at 8 and wed get off the phone at 12 or sometimes 3. Now im lucky to even get a phone call before 12 and for it to even last an hour . I'm afraid he might be cheating and my ex could be telling the truth although he is a compulsive liar. Idk what to believe .What do you think, am I getting cheated on? Is my ex right ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI decided to call him at 1:12 cause I waited up all night for his call, no answer. he texted me at 2:30 in the morning saying (his exact text) "srry I missed ur call but a I love yu babi nd I hope ur gud"? and then he called me twice back to back in the morning and I was sleep. SO when I woke up I called him ( 20 mins after he called me) and he didn't answer and I texted him ...no reply. He could just be at work but im so paranoid, hes being weird ! And I been crying and IDK why.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2013): Further to my earlier response, also don't forget that relationships relax after a while and where you could talk 3 hours or a whole night, eventually you do get to know the person and this eases up, it's a natural event.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2013): I haven't even read your whole message but already we have big problems: a compulsive liar and a player who are friends... hmn...Ok, having read through everything, it's not as bad as it seems.You need to cut contact with the ex who IS a compulsive liar so why even listen to his rants? He is doing nothing but ruin your peace of mind, and trying to derail your current relationship. Obviously your bf was not happy you were talking to the ex, so the above will really help. Next, you need to trust each other so communication is key. Both of you need to be open and honest, as you have done when you go out, you tell him, when you are tired, you say so, and when not, you say so too. Then he knows he can count on you and trust you, no matter where you are, who you are with and how late you get in. Just as it's scary for you while he is away and incontactable for 4 days at a time, the same goes for him. He can't see what you do, he can only go on your word.So both of you should have a discussion, preferably in person, where you agree to be exclusive and keep the ex out of the picture. They can be friends, but it's his own risk if the ex keeps making up stories and ruining it for both of you. Let him know how you feel, share that with each other, and if it's worth fighting for, then work on it, together and wait for each other.Good Luck
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A
female
reader, Thetruthisugly  +, writes (27 August 2013):
 Not to sure if he is cheating but with his calls and texts to you getting less it sounds like he is losing interest!! As the old saying goes out of sight out of mind!! If you were in his heart you would be on his mind.....meaning he would be calling and texting you every spare minute he had.
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