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Gf told me I'm not the best sex she's had, what should I do?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 July 2008) 9 Answers - (Newest, 17 November 2008)
A male Barbados age 30-35, *andada14 writes:

hey ppl out there ive been in a relationship for a year and some months and i used to ask my gf if i was the best at sex she used to tell me yes and i was the first person to make her to cum alot and when having sex now i ask her again recently who was the best she eva had cause i could see it in her eyes and her face that she wasnt telling me the truth. i keep asking her that night and she gave in and told me it was another guy she had a long time ago now she says that i was the best when making love and alot of other things she says im the love of her life and she really likes me i know this but what she told me really hurts me inside like really bad i really love her but cant find myself making love with her anytime soon i neeeed HELP!!!!

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A female reader, dearkelja United States +, writes (17 November 2008):

dearkelja agony auntHey Dandada-

I just want to add. There is sex and there is making love. A big difference between the two. I think you have pushed this woman to give you an answer to the sex question but you never asked her who made love the best. Sex is simply a physical act. Making Love is from the heart. I'd rather be told I was the best at making love. I think she told you that but you keep hearing who's better at sex.

Hope you're still on the site to have gotten this answer.

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A male reader, dandada14 Barbados +, writes (26 July 2008):

dandada14 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

dandada14 agony aunthey thanks everyone yes we spoke about and i feel better now plus im more man than any of the guys she liked in peronality and quailty i love her alot and want to build a future with her we both want it thanks

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A female reader, hasanswers123 Australia +, writes (26 July 2008):

You need to talk to her about it. Every girl likes something different so you need to ask her what she likes... do this suggestively. Dirty talk is the best way to find out what she likes. Experiment with different approaches. Often it;s not the sex that makes it the best but the lead up to the act that makes it better than the rest, that makes everything that follows even better.

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (26 July 2008):

DoubleM agony auntFirst of all, you seem to be "hung up" on being the "best." That is a trap, but if you really want to be a very good lover, you should consider learning everything possible about "cunnilingus." Search "cunningus" on this Web site and read my suggestions based on many years of practice. Although I claim no perfection as some readers have accused, it works.

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A female reader, -Red- Ireland +, writes (26 July 2008):

-Red- agony auntThe easiest way to give a girl what she wants in bed is to ask, hunni. Ask her what she wants you to do to her and i bet in no time you'll have her at your mercy lol :D

good luck


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A female reader, pinktopaz United States +, writes (26 July 2008):

Just because she said you're not the best doesn't mean you have to dump her! Obviously it's not an issue with her, otherwise she wouldn't want to be with you. Sex is important in a relationship, but it's not everything. You also have to realize that you can't be the best at everything either. Just because she said you weren't the best doesn't mean you're bad! But like anonymous put, you kept asking and she gave you an answer. It's like asking her what she thinks about the size of your penis. If you don't really want to know, then don't ask!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2008):

You asked, she gave you the answer you wanted to hear and theone she though would make you happiest. But that wasn't good enough for you. You couldn't leave well enough alone. You had to keep bugging her and bugging her. Well, you got exactly what you asked for: an honest answer. You've nobody but yourself to blame for how you feel.

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A male reader, JoJoman Canada +, writes (25 July 2008):

Do not depend on this woman for your own happiness and self esteem. If you obsess about thoughtless comments then she has power over you and she will keep pulling your chain.

When you're young you get all panicky and worried about finding someone to love. And when you find such a person you think that that's it, she's the only one I'll ever feel this way about. But there are billions of women in this world. What makes you think she's the only one?

If you're not married life is too short to get locked into a relationship with someone who does not care about your feelings. If she's just a GF I wouldn't put up with any nonsense. Nobody is worth the grief. When you're single you have this amazing opportunity to meet all kinds of women. Once you're married, especially if you have kids, you're trapped if you find yourself unhappy with your partner.

Freedom is precious don't waste it being tied to someone who makes you miserable.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2008):

What you should do, is copy-and-paste this and then post it as a question, you will get a lot more responses that way.


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