A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I am 16 and me and my boyfriend are very much in love and are seirous about our relationship. We haven't had sex but that not an issue, we'd both rather wait till we're older. He said that recently he's been sexually frustrated.- he feels horny all the time while thinking about me. At first he said he doesn't feel right masturbating if I don't know how he's feeling. Now he says that when he masturbates he feels good but after he feels unhappy. He says this is because he thinks of when we've done "stuff" together then consequently feels that doing something like masturbating, which only involves himself not me, doesn't feel right. I don't like knowing he's frustrated and feeling down and I know that this is his own personal problem, but I want to help him feel better. We're taking things slow so we haven't been really initmate in terms of sexual intimacy. We have a good relationship- we argue like any other couple, maybe even more, but we always talk it out. I just really need some advice.... help?!
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female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker  +, writes (31 October 2011):
 I think it does sounds suspiciously like a line to inveigle you into sexual contact. Assuming you don't want to go down that road (and you should not), just tell the guy that you don't mind him masturbating and that you'd rather he kept the details to himself.
Personally I find it a rather unwelcome trend these days for men of all ages to be eager to share the details of their masturbation habits with women.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (31 October 2011):
 "Sweetheart, I love going out with you and knowing that you find me attractive. That's nice.
"But, I have to request that tou keep your current frustration and any details of your own personal and private moments to yourself.
"Knowing all your details in that area is too much for me. Thanks!"
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 October 2011):
 What does he mean he doesn't like masturbating if you don't know how he's feeling... you know perfectly well how he's feeling.. he feels horny and that's normal and natural.
Personally if it was me I'd say "have fun".... and let him have at it.
are you 100% sure he's not giving you this as a line to get you to have sex with him?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2011): He really doesnt need any helping, he is a teenage boy and of course he is going to masturbate! Just tell him that it is completely natural and he doesnt have to tell you or even worry about! Let him know that just because he has a girlfriend he doesn't have to feel unhappy about masturbating!
It is really sensible to wait until you have sex. Let things move along slowly as you need to know each other really well.
Also you're only 16, so if you are arguing I dont want to sound patronising but at your age it shouldn't be at that stage already! I met my partner when we were 16 and we're 22 now and I wouldn't have liked to have been arguing at that age! We were a few years in before we had the odd tiff like other couples lol
Good luck, please don't even worry about this just reassure your boyfriend that to you it isn't a problem! :)
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