A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Do some guys just have the mojo? like austin powers?My question is for the women out there, do some men just have some kind of attraction around them or something. Something that just makes a women want to have sex with them? If a guy was to have some super mojo (if it exists) would alot of women be attracted to him? Would he be btter off continuing to see women, pleasing them etc or better off trying to settle down?Are these men seen as players regardless of what they do or say?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2010): I think it must be various things, certainly someone who looks just a bit different than average, or acts a bit different from average, and has a pleasant smile and way about them without being overtly a "player" must have this.
I never felt that way till I started wearing a wedding ring, then it seemed that way to many women wanted to talk to me and be extra friendly when I was working (whereas before I thought I might get old and die before I met someone).
I've heard this from other guys as well, about the wedding ring thing, so that's a pretty small change in my appearance and my behavior must not have changed much (my dress and appearance didn't).
It also happened that when I was single I attracted a few married women, in addition to the single women, who clearly wanted of get into bed with me (I'm not and was not a flirt), which I suspect was because of my income and they were looking to "trade up" as they perceived that because of the work I did that I had a higher income.
This was more than a small problem, I was pursued by a couple of married women, in fact, when my wife and I started dating, on the second date she told me "There is something I need to tell you..." and I just knew it was going to be "I'm married". Thankfully it was not, she had been married, and was divorced several years before.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2010): I don't know about men, but for women it id definitely possible, which means it is probably the same for men. I had a friend who was like a magnet to guys, she had legions of guys after her, like moths to a flame and she was a pretty average looking girl. My mom told me she had had a coworker like that.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2010): My husband has it. He is an alpha male, charming, french accent, women drool. Totally faithful to me. Men want to be his friend too. Think James Bond. That's my hubby.
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A
female
reader, Viv Acious  +, writes (12 November 2010):
Good answer Seeingstars!
And what an interesting question. I can only guess at the motivation for asking it. The first part of the question is really for the ladies to answer on this site. The second part, would he better off settling down, etc, would really be for this supergod to answer himself, wouldn't it?
I have met many men. Some are physically gorgeous but not sexy. Some not particularly handsome but very condident, funny and ultimately sexy. Some I fancied like mad but my friends would raise an eyebrow in sheer bewilderment.
However, the closest I have only ever come to super-mojo, was years ago. A friend and myself were running an event. I came across a man, in his 40s, that can only be described to be exuding such an incredible strong, powerful alpha male PRESENCE that myself and a friend, both almost went literally lightheaded at about 30 feet away. (He was not handsome at all).I mean...lightheaded as if stoned. We didn't even talk to this man. Afterwards, we did say to each other...what the hell was that? That is the only time I have experienced that. What a bloody shame..hehe!
xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2010): when i read your question i immediately thought of two men who, it appears, think they 'fit the bill' as 'gifts to women'. Except they are not. One is married to a lovely smart woman, who, sadly, believes his every excuse. The other is more hot headed so is now a tiny bit older and wiser. He has alreaded discarded three wives. And due to his earlier marriages the other guy is a lot poorer as well. But remember these men are into serious self promotion, and inflated ego. Yet one of them has only a series (ever changing) of women who they see occasionally, usually until the woman wake up. The other appears to be 'resting' from being randy. Maybe because he's getting tired of it. But more likely because he's trying to reel in this rich but very unattractive woman who is not falling for the lies. So lovely to see herresisting the onslaught. Listening to them talk you would think they are wildly consistently successful with women. But it is not true. They just try it on with so many more women than ordinary, genuine good men. I think of them as rutting stags, always running ragged after skirt. I do Of those 2 players:agree they can be very funny, tell lots of jokes, have quick repartee, and can spot a likely woman from 40 paces. They never stop looking. Neither ever appealed to me and never could. Both have no problem collecting other phone numbers from women, even though arrive at a function with dates. Both boast adfinitum about other womern Both are street smart. Both have no problem lying at all times to get themselves out of scrapes. They have the essential tools of players: jobs that allow plenty of travel, and both maintain separate Bank accounts and credit cards and mobiles and email accounts that their wives know nothing about. These are men who think they are successful with women, because they keep latching to the same sort of trusting woman who believes their lies. And like the gambler the 'player' boasts what a winner he is with woman. The truth is, after they wake up to his manipulation, is that he leaves a string of women, dissatisfied with themselves that they could have believed his 'story'. If a man is a 'player' he marks himself as an immature un-evolved smuck, stuck emotionally at 15, when he thought he was the King of Sex, because he had just discovered same. I know there are many such men. To me they are losers. Real men are never players. These two men mentioned think they are 'getting away with it'. They fool no one but themselves and the gullible women who think there is some substance beyond their boastful bragado.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2010): I don't think any one guy can be attractive to a lot of women. I think it just depends on individual tastes. I have met a few men in my life who I felt had some sort of magnetism about them. I felt incredibly attracted to them, and my thoughts would pretty much immediately turn sexual when I was around them. But if I asked other people what they thought, they would say things like, "Well, he's alright I guess..." or "Hmm, not really my type..." You get the idea. So I suppose a guy can have some sort of attraction around him which might attract certain women who are drawn to his particular magnetism.
As for what he should do, see women or settle down, I think that would be a choice for him to make depending on what he wanted. If he didn't feel ready to settle down, then it would be fine to date and get to know women. I am not talking about cheating on women though, that would be a no-no in my book. And if he felt at a stage in life to settle down, that would be fine too.
I only view a guy as a player if they mess people around, play mind games, or cheat, and have no consideration for the effects their actions may be having on the hurt women they leave behind.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (12 November 2010):
 There's no mojo, haha! What does exist is charm. Charm is a way you act, behave, talk, move, look at people a certain way. Charm makes women drop like flies. A charming man, if he is physically attractive as well, can have about any woman he wants.
These men are better off doing whatever it is they want to. They aren't players, they aren't incapable of settling down, they don't HAVE to please women, they can even be introverted and not like other people... It's completely random and depends on the person.
Typically, if you have charm you make women laugh, smile, feel special, make them feel wanted, you are friendly, smart, and serious about serious matters, and respectful.
It could be natural, or you could fake it. A player will fake all these things, pretend to be respectful when he really is using you etc.
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A
female
reader, sammi star +, writes (12 November 2010):
 The only way he'd be seen as a player is if that's what he is! and as for settling down or not, that's an individual choice.
This 'mojo' you're talking about...I think women are instinctivly attracted to a man who looks confident and not like he's taking himself too seriously. If you spot a guy standing at the bar and he's looking moody and posing then he's not going to look approachable whereas the guy who's smiling and having a laugh will attract much more attention.
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