A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:when I commit to a special man I hope to be his only and for him to get his sexual arousal from my body alone...is this too much to ask.....I cant imagine ever needing to look at another mans body for arousal once commited....and I cant imagine ever being happy to share my body with man who uses porn...... do men like this exist or should I give up and stay single?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009): Wow, now there is a really good question. I think that the answer is no. All men at one time or another have been curious about their sexuality and looked at porn in one form or another. Even if it was just opening an issue of Playboy as a teenager. I think that women have done the same. I know that when I started to discover that there were differences between boys and girls I was curious. Does this mean that I am into porn and think that you should be too? No, not at all. The thing is that I have grown up and realized that there is no place for porn in my life... much like you have.I think that is where the problem lies. Men are far more immature than women. Men don't think that there is anything wrong with porn even if it hurts their woman's feelings and crushes their self esteem. Men feel they have every right to do what they want, when they want with no repercussions. In other words... men are selfish. I hope that they are not all like this but it has been my experience that most are. I cannot tell you if you should stay single or not. But I will suggest that you don't.Why? Well, right now you are wondering if you are better off alone or not. Wouldn't you rather know for sure? I would. And I did find out for myself. Like you, I have always thought that I would never want to be in a relationship with a man who is into porn. I found a man who by all accounts is great. He cooks, cleans (do you know how hard it is to find a man that helps around the house?), brings flowers home for no reason.... does all the nicest things. A dream guy as it were – except for the porn. He is a classic porn addict. I know that there are probably other women out there saying, “So what is the problem?” But for me porn is a deal breaker no matter how wonderful the man is. I spent three years trying to make our relationship work but just couldn't do it. The more he watched internet porn the more I learned to hate him and less I wanted him to touch me. To me it felt like all the nice things he did was just his attempt to ease his guilty conscience. The experience taught me that for me it is indeed better to be single than to be in a relationship with a man who watches porn... but I didn't know that for sure until I went through all that. Now I am sure that I am happier and better off alone. You need to be able to decide that for yourself too. Trust me it isn't easy... it is a long and painful road but from walking it you will know what you can or can not live with. I wish you the best of luck with it. And if what you are truly wanting in life is a relationship with a porn free man I hope you find him. If you do find him ask him if he has an older brother of a like mind because where I would rather be alone than with a man who watches porn what I would really love is to find a good man who isn't into it at all.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2009): My husband does not watch porn. He does not go to strip clubs either. It is not too much to ask of the right man but you have to get the right guy or else he will just do it in secret. Pornography was a dealbreaker for me early in our relationship, and I told him that. He told me that he liked looking at magazines and movies (Hustler was his favourite) but compared to a real women, he would take the real women any day. I am a very jealous and naturally suspicious person and could not stand the thought of my man getting off on another women's body. Some people may say I am insecure or controlling but we have been happily married for 19 years and still have sex almost every day. Oh, and despite what other posters said that men who do not look at porn don't have a very high sex drive, my husband has a very high sex drive. He is turning 45 next week and can still bang me several times in one day. So, yes there are men who do not look at porn but from what I have read, it is pretty rare. If you find one that has a high sex drive and condition him to only get hard when he looks at you, it is worth the wait. However, you have to keep him sexually happy. Don't act frigid and don't use sex as a weapon. Happily indulge him consistently and he will never have to look at porn to get what he wants.
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female
reader, heybigspender  +, writes (27 May 2009):
Men will always watch porn it is something I think we will just have to deal with. I am 24, extremely good looking, do glamour and underwear modeling and have a naturally VERY curvy body which my boyfriend loves. He pesters me for sex all the time, so most people would think he would not need to look at porn but he does. We have had so many arguments over this but now I have come to accept that he will always view porn it is so easily assessable nowadays and no matter how good looking and perfect you are as his girlfriend it won’t make anything difference. It such a shame but it’s the reality that we have to live with! x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009): I actually have been wondering this same thing too....glad someone else asked this question. When I met my fiancee he didnt have alot of porn 1 movie to be exact and didnt purchase girly magazines either he was open about it with me and that was cool. He ended up cheating on me a few months after I lost my virginity too him and although I chose to stay with him after awhile I started to change ie become very insecure because the girl he cheated with was so gorgeous and I am and have always been just average looking, I couldnt help it but things like porn and perving on naked chicks etc started to bother me due to my own insecurity issues from feeling not good enough when he cheated. After awhile we moved out together and I was unpacking his stuff one day and noticed his porno wasnt where he usually kept it, I asked him what he had done with it and he said he had given it to my brother lol which he had. I hadnt asked him to do this but he knew it did upset me him looking at it since he cheated. Its years down the track now we are still together and I still have issues with porn and dont want him looking at it behind my back I cant help but feel betrayed if he does this....I havent caught him looking at it behind my back and we have talked and he has told me that he wouldnt want me doin it to him so he wont do it to me but because of infidelity in the past I dont know whether to completly trust if he is looking at it if he would tell me the truth or not, I cant help but think about it alot when I am not home and to make it worse a shit stirring ex-friend of mine turned around when we were fighting and told me she knew that he does look at porn behind my back to prove that I didnt know everything, that has got my mind racing and me worried. He has a high sex drive but he knows that I am always there when he wants it and I am not a prude and am happy to experiment, make our own movies/photographs for his viewing....I know its important to try new positions and keep the spark there.All my friends tell me that there isnt a guy out there that doesnt look at porn and again that gets me thinking am I just being a fool in trusting what he is telling me? I feel the same as alot of the other women on here, its a personal choice and no one is wrong or right just because we dont like it doesnt make us wrong, even though that arguement has been thrown at me alot during my life, ppl think I am WEIRD cause I dont like it, and that at times makes me feel really alone cause I cant really talk to my friends as they dont understand and are like what is the big deal...thanks to whoever wrote this question and to everyone who answered it for the broad view and opinions. And in closing it was really nice to see that there are other ladies out there like me and I am not as weird and different as everyone makes me out to be :(
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2009): Answer: They exist but you most probably won't want them. They're monks or priests or religious fanatics that associate porn with divine evil. Most cases their beliefs forbid them to LOOK at another woman, that would include you too. That said, you shouldn't stay single because of this, it's totally absurd unless you're a nun.
I have no issues with my husband looking at porn. What I don't understand is why previously we used to share porn (yes we're such carnal creatures) but now after we've moved houses he lies that he can't find them. Yeah right. I chanced upon them by accident when trying to make a jammed drawer unstuck; and looking for past issues of PC Magazine only to find some porn mags in between go figure.
I have to disagree with those respondents who accuse you of being insecure. The truth no woman will willingly admit they felt horrified and disgusted the FIRST time they discover their husband/partner has been hiding porn from them. As time went on they slowly get accustomed to accepting his secretive antics. Don't let them beat you down girl, they have started feeling awkward like you before. Also being uncomfortable with your man looking at porn hardly ever equates to you feeling less than his perfect woman. Sure there are few insecure women out there but truly the minority. We're just upset the Love of Our Life chooses to let his mind wander and fantasize about having sex with other women when we're here offering ourselves to them hot, ready and unsatisfied. I don't know why they do this, I'm guessing they're fantasizing about the girl they can't have.
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female
reader, triplemock +, writes (6 February 2009):
Oh one more thing, important to this ques. I have dated a lot, most men do watch, search, look, thats fine. None of my ex's ever did it in my face,( the only guy who did, i broke it off with in haste!! discreet is the way to go, keep that crap under the bed or........IN THE CLOSET) so you don't insult ppl you love.Twice finding that raunchy crap on TWICE in the middle of the day. That dude needed a life and was NOT partner material. Never allowed myself to fall in with a disrespectful man again. MEN if you have a great woman, one you look at others wives and go damn i'm lucky, your a fool if shes's not more important than vulger images.
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female
reader, triplemock +, writes (6 February 2009):
What a topic, I've been with my guy for three years, and at the age of 36 I'm still pretty hot, i don't mind a lil' porn every once in a great while!! but to be exhausted and wake up and he's NOT playing video games on the pc.,he's findin' him some strange ( TO Look AT)!! Anyway he did'nt let me know he was'nt getting enough to live on!!!!Which is anytime he shows interest ( hey i'm his, right?) LOL Anyway now he's found a way to get these games they have out there, where you can get your virtual chick to act and do EXACTLY what a man wants the way he wants it. OHHHHH, he shares this crap with guys at work too, AND that is soooo unfair, as an excuse to find this crap online 'cause honey if u saw Their wives you would c y they NEED it. But i'm not bored OR boring, so how can he do this with an attractive wife 3 feet away on a plush bed? Should'nt he desire me FIRST? At frickin' least let me try? He watches this crap, and then expects me to be the aggressive one, so he does'nt invade my space, and all it's done is led to me being LESS forthright with it,now i feel like he's being entertained elsewhere, Soooooo screw it!!(PUN INTENDED) Men watch PORN b/c those women do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING their wife may not want to do and they do itto PAID! Their own husbands r looking elsewhere to, if they can even get one to keep them after they show all. I don't look, my freinds r'nt staring at other men either(THE MARRIED ONES)I LUST for NO ONE but my husband!!!!And HE respectfully should be the same, or i guess hands on, will need to be tossed if he's got his entertainment somewhere else, i don't give a rats ass if he's looking at a naked woman next door or on the p.c.,(you will love this)he says he does'nt look to get aroused, just curious!!(WHATEVER) If he needs something EXTRA he should ALWAYS cum here first!!!! sorry about the tacky ending. But i get so tired of MEN backing each other up on this, if your single porn away,outgrow it please,HORNY HORNY HORNY IS SOOOOO old.Grow up
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): when i was in my early teens i watched a fair amount of porn, but now that im older its just a once in a while thing.
some of my mates never watch porn, some watch far too much. the ones who dont watch any tend to be the strange types.
so yes there are some out there, but they probably are afraid of trying it out, are confused about their sexuality (if we're talking about porn that straight men usually find attractive), or have mental issues.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2008): I think most men do watch porn, I know its not nice to hear! when i met my husband I asked him if he was into it and he said no, after we got married I found porn on the internet and was very upset.
I think its very unrealistic to expect to find a man who hasnt looked at porn at some point in his life. Saying that I also believe it is totally fair for you to ask a man that you love and who loves you back to give up porn for you.
Its such a sensitive issue for a women and there is no right or wrong. Some women (like myself) dont want it in their marriages or relationships as we feel so much more contented with our man and ourselves without it in our partners life. Some women really dont mind their partner watching it and may also watch themselves!
A man who loves and respects you for who you are will give it up for you. A man who wont you should let walk away and he will find a women who doesnt mind it.
My husband and I have a much better sex life and are so much more connected when porn is not in our lives. My husband would be the first to tell you that, he would also admit that sometimes he is tempted but would not risk hurting me and loosing my trust and everything else. I think its a small price for a man to pay to be honest!
I hope this helps
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2008): im a guy and i dont watch porno.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2008): ---COMING FOR YOUR RESCUE ----
Porn is porn, whether watched as a habit, or once in a while. The sole purpose is to make one captive. There is no such thing as soft-porn. It captures your mind, body and even ones emotion. It has side effects that are subtle but starts becoming apparent. One thing that led me to this site is that I was the victim of watching porn once. I tell you, even a single watch is dangeorus and disasterous. Now, why do some feel guilty when they have COMPLETED watching porn? Because it is morally wrong. It makes them go farther away from the truth. Just like Adam sinned and went farther away from God. Friends, don't watch porn. If you are addicted, I suggest you pray for deliverance. Lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes (and pride of self) are the only ways that perishes a person, and the BLOOD OF JESUS is the only way to receive deliverance from such lust and pride. Now, you might say: "But its unavoidable". I know it is, that's why you need to CALL upon the BLOOD of JESUS to CLEANSE you. CALL OUT LOUD, REBUKE THE DEVIL, DEVIL IS AFRAID OF THE BLOOD OF JESUS. You might ask "how many times?". The answer is, as many times as Satan brings obnoxious and perverted thoughts and desires, keep of resisting him. He will flee. Trust me, and trust the HOLY BLOOD OF JESUS even more, you will be delievered, and can leave a peaceful and happy life. You will also impress your woman in doing so. You don't have to confess anything to any human, yes that's right. All you have to do CONFESS, SEEK FORGIVENESS and DELIEVRANCE from JESUS ONLY. He is the only person who will understand you and release you from such bondage. Remember, never be afraid to SHOUT A FAITHFUL PRAYER TO JESUS, HIS BLOOD WILL CLEANSE YOU FROM ALL BONDAGE AND GIVE YOU THE PEACE, JOY and SATISFACTION you are so much looking for.
For those who are saying that they don't feel guilty or have no emotional feelings when or after watching a porn, they are lying. They want to pull you in. Don't listen to them!
My heart goes out to those who want to release themselves from such addictions or those who are pursuing such dangerous course. Please CALL THE BLOOD OF JESUS, and HE WILL SAVE YOU, EVERYTIME, AND ALL THE TIME. Write the prayer below, and SHUTDOWN YOU WHOLE COMPUTER, AND SAY THIS PRAYER OUT LOUD. MAKE SURE YOU CAN CLEARLY HEAR YOURSELF PRAYING THIS PRAYER:
LORD JESUS, CONQUERER and GREAT VICTOR OF SIN AND DEATH, PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR MY LUSTFUL DESIRES. TAKE MY DESIRES AND TURN THEM IN TO TRUE AND GENUINE LOVE THAT I MAY ENJOY LIFE AS YOU HAVE CREATED ME TO DO. I CALL UPON YOUR BLOOD, JESUS, TO CLEANSE ME, TO RENEW MY WHOLE BODY, HEART, MIND, AND SPIRIT, RIGHT NOW! GIVE ME YOUR STRENGTH, WISDOM, AND POWER JESUS, TO FIGHT THIS LUST AND SEE THE TRUTH CLEARLY. I REBUKE THE DEVIL OF LUST AND GUILT IN THE MIGHTY NAME OF JESUS. I KNOW JESUS, BY FAITH, THAT YOU HAVE FORGIVEN ME AND DELIEVERED ME TODAY. I THANK YOU SO MUCH, FOR YOUR WISDOM, UNDERSTANDING, AND STRENGTH. IN JESUS' MIGHTY NAME I PRAY, AMEN.
Now you may turn you PC!
Have a blessed day and my prayers with you all.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2008): I sometimes look at porn (when I don't have a girlfriend or my girlfriend is away), but I've seen enough of it to realize that it is boring and pale next to the real thing. I actually bought some tonight and am looking forward to watching it with her! But I can certainly live without it.
As for looking at other girls, yes, who doesn't? Naked or not, an attractive woman is a pleasure to behold. No one is saying that you have to start chasing them, but surely you can look!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2008): There are men out there who don't watch porn - once they have found you, all they can see is a beautiful, sexy woman who is everything they ever wanted. There is no possible way that any other woman in the entire world could turn him on as much as you do. He worships only you, loves only you, is entirely dedicated to only you, would do anything in the world for you, and only wants to make you happy. All he sees, loves and desires is you.
Wouldn't a man like that be the best thing, just imagine it!
...
Now for all you ladies who just imagined that scenario... caught ya!; because that was womens porn - fantasizing about someone other than your partner.
Men have their porn, us women, have our own.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2008): I hate men.I hate my boyfriend.WHY DO YOU JERKS NEED TOO LOOK AT OTHER WOMEN NAKED.I swear to God I never find other men attractive. I'm so pissed off because my boyfriend who apparently "Doesn't need porn" because he has me and I'm so beautiful blah blah bullshit, has been looking up asian women with insanely huge tits. Well I`m sorry my boobs are small. I`m sorry i`m not good enough you stupid jerk.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008): I have been with my boyfriend almost two years and he has never liked porn before. I recently have been finding things that I don't like. It upsets me a lot because he never tells me the truth anymore and I have to go to his friends to try to get the truth out of him(I know that is wrong). I do not like men that watch porn and it upsets me a lot to think my boyfriend has to go somewhere else to be happy when I am right in front of his face. I have been accusing him of things, but I don't even know if he does it yet, but I know him well enough to know his actions. I'm afraid that if he does watch porn, that's gonna be the end of our relationship.
Any advice?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2008): All I want to say is that there are indeed men who don't watch porn. Sure I did once myself. I was young and I was exploring. But when I met my girlfriend at the age of 14, I logically quit. I even stopped masturbating and not only for her. She's very happy with all this and I am too. Not (only) because I make her happy to have (sadly) such a special boyfriend, but also because I like to control myself. I'm not gonna jerk off or watch naked women other than her because of some stupid compulsion. I think that's wrong and I know it would hurt my girlfriend.So they are out there. Don't give up. You'll find one eventually. And when you find him: love him, reward him, make him happy and tel him know how happy you are with him. Good luck! (By the way: I'm just a 17-year-old from the Netherlands. Take that, you stupid men of 30+ who can't even leave masturbating and watching porn!)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2008): This issue is not about porn being right or wrong.This issue is about whether porn is right or wrong FOR YOU. You don't like porn, so it is therefore wrong for you - all the people trying to justify it and force it on you are telling you to settle for unhappiness. Most importantly, be true to yourself. It is better to be single and happy than in a relationship and miserable, regardless of whether it's due to porn, drugs or any other form of disrespect.Remember, it is not about the rightness or wrongness of any form of behaviour, it is about what is right or wrong FOR YOU PERSONALLY. If it makes you unhappy, don't accept it!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008): I am a male who watches a lot of porn. It's a different story that I am trying to break that habit but I am afraid that it progressed in to an addiction (I just can't stop that habit anymore!!). I am sure there are guys who think its moral wrong to watch porn and don't indulge in it. However, you also need to understand that, men in general, are prone to appreciate beautiful females. It's a lie that any man doesn't get affected when an hot woman passes by in front of him. They tend to look. Now, isn't it the same thing with women? Doesn't a desirable man get your attention even if you are married. Now, where you draw the boundary is the real question and probably what you should be contemplating about your man.
Forgive me if my answer doesn't make any sense to you! Good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2008): No your not wrong and no they don't exist, I've learned they don't watch it to get hard the watch it to learn new (pactions?) As long as he isn't hiding them cool down. A good way to stop it also is go buy a camcorder and make yall own, hell love it:) trust me had the same problem
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2008): It's easy to make exuses for our selfish desires. Saying that there is nothing wrong with porn is like saying there is nothing wrong with drinking and doing drugs...all the above are addictions and diseases,"rehab" I think is the word they use for treatment. Yup, pornography is also anaddiction, so don't try to make a twisted issue look so normal. True, it's an adult choice and as imperfect human beings we make stupid choices that positively destroy your morality and relatioships. AND, not everyone has self-control or self-discpline which makes you follow in the steps of those ignorant, self-destructive porn stars. Men, don't don't forget that you are contributing to sites that child molesters log onto. This entire world is governed by Satan, it's up to you if you let him tempt you into the worst.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2008): Porn is normal for men, like it or not.
But if you've dealt with a man with a real problematic addiction to porn, you do not need to feel like you'll have to tolerate THAT in any man.
Being attracted to other women and actually looking are not always going hand in hand. And some men just aren't as into it as others.
And also, try to understand that what porn looks like is not entirely what every viewer wants to see. I think the average male porn user does not enjoy being nearly as demeaning & dominating towards women as the average porno is showing. Pornos are partly a product of what the people MAKING the porn like, and there are some real dirtbags in that industry.
It's like how a lot of women might enjoy "Sex and the City" or "Desperate Housewives" but they would not actually want to copy the lives of those characters themselves. Those shows are exaggerated escapist stuff.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2008): Im a man that doesnt watch porn my gf is the only one that makes me feel sexually aroused. she is beautiful to me!! even after 13 years!!
I havnt even considered watching it and i dont find any other girls attractive appart from my gf. I dont masterbate lol she does it for me.. I dont rely on her to she wants to so i let her obviously returning the favour because i want her to feel good. masterbating is disgusting and i hate that most men do it... its like having fake sex... how can you touch yourself like that unless its a girl doing it ugh... you know what its like to feel another guys genitals then. its just like watching porn its NOT REAL. I hate everything to do with FAKE.
Ryan 28, Manchester
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male
reader, Replacement  +, writes (7 September 2008):
 I am a man who doesn't watch porn.
Don't settle for a man who isn't compatible with you. You must both be happy to live a porn-free existence, don't force a man who watches it to change, he will never be happy and neither will you. It's something a couple has to decide together, and both partners must be happy with the decision.
I am perfectly happy without porn. My girlfriend appreciates my fidelity. We have a strong bond and a great sex life.
Don't give up and stay single unless that is what would truly make you happy. Keep looking, we exist.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2008): i agree with chicken licken, i think it has a lot to do with personal insecurities and or relationship issues (whether it be emotional, inability to commit, inability to 'free' yourself sexually). Whatever issue(s) their may be, causes us as women to criticise ourselves by comparing unrealistically to other women. Consequently, this affects our relationship which then becomes a downward spiral to a lot of bitterness and less sex with our partners (almost forcing them to watch porn!!)
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male
reader, eddie + ♥, writes (6 September 2008):
 You shouldn't stay single but you should be a little more in tune with the reality of the situation. Most importantly though, you need to define what "arousal" means to you. Is arousal merely noticing another woman, getting an erection, masturbating to porn etc? If I see a woman I find to be really attractive, my mind is momentarily aroused. Or in other words, it has received a message that my eyes noticed something, my brain has a file for. That file is full of things I find attractive. Big deal! From that file, I make comparisons and choices. That file helped me to choose my wife, based on what she had and how it compared to my mental arousal fie. You have one too. That is how you chose your partner. Even if he was your first partner, you still had a "potential file", based on your life experiences to that point.
It is normal to expect that your future mate to only get his "physical" sexual arousal from you. "Mental" arousal is another issue. You can not control someones thought process. If we encounter someone or something and we find it to be what we consider appealing, the thought has been processed. The thought can not be stopped. The amount attention we give the thought can be controlled, but not the thought.
I have another example. Let's assume you marry your mate. At some point your mate dies and you're single again. It is possible for you to find a new mate. That is because there is another person out there who could arouse you. There is another person you find attractive on this planet. Based on what your mental file consists of, he interests you. It is important to remember that you would also have found him attractive if you were still married. The difference is that your "interest" level would have been different if you were in a healthy marriage.
Our mental file is full of images, memories, thoughts, likes, dislikes etc. These are things we experience in life. It helps us to makes decisions that define who we are.
So, to answer your question, looking at another persons body is normal. Porn is one extreme, noticing an attractive person is another. You may not like porn. That is your choice. But, if you ever expect to be the only person who even arouses interest in your partner's mind, you're not being realistic. There is a big difference between attracted to someone and being interested in someone. One is a thought and the other is a potential action.
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female
reader, nice bitch +, writes (6 September 2008):
Women, you are all saying the same thing. The real question is; What is the norm in order to deal with it. Both women and men are equally visually stimulated, we are all just seeing mostly women we're all stimulated by it they sexually us we don't want to go there. Research shows our body parts are virtually the same ours is in. Our trigger points are in different locations that theirs, most women don't seek sexual things because the points aren't known. We don't get what we could be out of sex so we don't prioritize it. Books can teach you about this, also studies show pornography is the path to pedophilia. If they do it too much the stimuli get less and they require more. They bible I think says it is cheating. I wrestle the same crap. so my angle is it is entertainment that should not be forbidden all should be open and let each other know the caliber of desire for, both should agree on its use, not never to do alone but not be creapy massive alone use. Each should tell hot irrantants or dislikes and take turns not having or dealing with personal turn-ons without ridicule, try to hit each others needs. and get the hell out, or get help if its massive in all areas. dangerous to heart body esteem on and on.
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male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (6 September 2008):
 Yes prehaps there are men who dont watch porn. But if you expect a man to never be aroused in any other way besides your body is undreal. Men see other women, pictures and tv and can be aroused if they want to be or not. Fact is i find your points to controlling the fact you want a man to only look at you and you though is what should be isnt what happens in the world and isnt how people operate.
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female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (5 September 2008):
 Yes they exist! In a magical land were ALL women are NOT naggy and ALL men pay attention!
And if you close your eyes, shake your head, you can imagine seeing it.
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female
reader, nellynelly1305 +, writes (5 September 2008):
 All men watch porn and masturbate wheather they admit to it or not. the good thing here is that when they do watch porn and masturbate they think and fantasise of their girlfriend. so maybe it doesnt feel nice for us girls but watching porn is absolutely normal for men
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male
reader, JTalbott +, writes (5 September 2008):
 You're the only person that can enjoy the sexual pleasure your body gives you. Said differently, you can't experience another person's orgasm, they can't experience yours. So in a sense, the best sex is when you get what you want and your partner gets what they want out of it in the way they they want it.
So savor your human experience and let your significant other find his in the manner that bring him happiness.
Just do it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2008): There's no need to stay single. I don't know what the entry requirements are, but perhaps you could apply to join the Amish community?
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male
reader, Danielepew  + ♥, writes (5 September 2008):
 You brought several ideas to the table.
Expecting your man to be committed to you is fine. But, expecting that he might never ever get aroused by seeing another woman is unreal. All people have eyes and sexual desires and they are supposed to work with anyone, not just you. I think you need to realize that such an idealized thing does not exist. The sooner you do this, the better; you will be happy because you will have a relationship that exists in the real world.
You may not need another man for arousal, but I am sure you have got aroused by more than one man.
When I was a kid, most of us had our first glimpse of female flesh from porn magazines. They were smuggled with perhaps more zeal than drugs, and they were way more forbidden. That happened some years ago. Some advertisements you see on TV these days would have been unthinkable when I was a child, and would have been considered "pornography". These days, when porn is that easily available, I don't think there's a man who hasn't looked at porn (save for the blind, maybe?). Maybe there's one, but he will be hard to find. I think that a more realistic expectation is to hope to find a man who may have looked at porn, perhaps too enthusiastically, but prefers the real thing once he has it.
All in all, I think you need to get your feet on the ground. If you can't picture yourself in a relationship that's not your ideal one, I'm afraid you can't be in a real relationship.
I sincerely hope this helps.
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female
reader, Lilly Rose +, writes (5 September 2008):
 My boyfriend doesnt watch porn! So yes men do exsist who dont watch it ;) There hard to find but there sure out there!
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male
reader, troubledtoomuch + ♥, writes (5 September 2008):
 You may be able to find a man who will never look at porn, will never get aroused by some hot babe in a low cut top and a push up bra, will never get aroused by a sexy magazine ad, but you will have a long wait before you find this guy. Oh, and by the way, if he never gets aroused by any of this then he is not likely to ever get aroused by your body either.
There are women who write on healthboards asking what they can do about their husband with no sexual desire and who never has the desire to have sex with them. Is this what you want? If it is, then they exist.
If only this perfect prince that you desire will do, then my suggestion is for you to stay single. It will be a lot less frustrating than looking for that which does not likely exist.
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A
female
reader, veryhurt +, writes (5 September 2008):
My husband and I were married for 46 years. The day I found out he was in to porn and following thru with prostitutes he shot himself. He was a brilliant, brilliant man. I was doubly devestated as I never knew. We were so, so, much in love. It leads to terrible things and it is WORSE than a drug addiction. We have 7 children and 13 grandchildren and an extremely happy marriage.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2008): Sorry babes, I don't believe there is any man alive who will only get aroused by your body and nothing else. Men get aroused by lots of things, it's an automatic response, they will get aroused by other women they see, they will get aroused by seeing underwear in a shop, they will get aroused by looking at peaches in a box. That is the way their reproductive organs and their mind is set up. They are not women, they are set up like this, to make sure they repopulate the world and spread their genes. There are many men who don't like porn and find it repulsive, but it's hard to find that very special guy. Even if you ask men, they will lie about using porn, just as they will lie when they say they don't think of sex when they see other women. So you can't even ask them and expect them to be truthful about the true state of their sexual desires. If this is totally necessary for you, then yes of course remain single. But I think this would be overkill, it's like cutting of your nose to spite your face. Don't you have needs, don't you have desires. Would you rather go without somebody holding you, because there is no man alive that is a saint. You idea of staying alone is not very sensible and will ultimately prove very lonely for you. Men are about more than sex, they can be good friends, companions and providers as well, maybe you should look at the positives rather than concentrating on the negatives of what relations with men will bring.
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female
reader, chicken licken +, writes (5 September 2008):
I think you have some insecurities and low esteem that maybe is the root of your problem here.
Men and women look for and get different things from sex, we are built differently physically and chemicaly , our brains are very differnt too.
If you have a good sex life and are in a good relationship with your man then the porn is only really being viewed in the same sense as we for example shop for shoes, the subject matter may differ there tremendously with shoes v's nudes but its pleasurable and the brain craves pleasurable. It dosnt mean we dont have rational thinking or even stop likeing as much the other things we find pleasurable.
I would be less bothered by my man looking at porn than oggling and chatting up flirting in chatrooms or down the pub, Thats dangerous ground.
And the man who would rather the porn than his own girlfriend is a man who
isnt mr right anyway and the relationshup is unlikely to work anyway.
And the man whos into illegal and addicted to porn has a problem that need proffesional help.
Some men are very open and loud about porn, posters of pin ups mags dvds about,completly trust worthy and loyal but love the female form and love there girlfriends form just as much.
The porn mgs and sites are generaly very out of reach and unreal very airbrushed, in personal and glossy, the men looking at it know it too and most would probably preffer to see there girlfriend doing the same pose for them or act/ role play for them. I think a of men use it as a form of education too on how to do it, I should think the man who looks at porn is far more considerate and open to there partners needs in bed than the man who dosnt do porn.
You need learn to love your self and stop compairing yourself to airbrushed glossy images that will never be .. and be confident that the man you are with loves you too, and isnt compairing you either ......there is no comparison thats why hes with you and not someone else.
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female
reader, hlskitten + ♥, writes (5 September 2008):
 Theres loads of guys that 'dont mind' porn. I dont think ive ever dated anyone that needs it to get them off, or watches any large amount of it. More take or leave it kind of thing.
C xxx
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (5 September 2008):
 They do exist but I'll bet you'll have a devil of a time finding one. I guess if this is such a huge issue for you, you'd best get used to being single.
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female
reader, lilgirly  +, writes (5 September 2008):
 i think that it's normal for all men to watch porn..but there is a big difference between men addicted to porn and men who watch it from time to time....
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