A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:HiIf you offered to lend someone 5 grand because they said their remortgage was definately coming through in 2 weeks(their broker assured them) Then they got refused the remortgage :o? would you be a bit brassed off about it? I mean, if you split a month later because of the arguments about it, but they paid half back within 2 months, but couldnt afford the rest til their house sells. Which it isn't showing signs of, what with houses not selling at the mo.We are still mates and he mentions getting back together slowly, which i have said i dont want. I dont see him in that way anymore. I cant see how he can expect me to just forget he owes me 2 and a half grand anyway (he hasnt ever said he wont pay it by the way, apart from in arguments)He says the monery is a seperate issue to us. Could you see it like that?My mum says tell him getting back together isnt an option til you have paid it all back, then you might think about it!Ive had to up my overdraft because he took my last penny of savings plus some of it i lent him i got an overdraft for, but atleast that was paid back from the 2 and a half he has managed to give me so far. But vets bills and rising living costs recently has had me upping it again because he still has 2 and a half grand of my savings i could of used!Am i being a cow?
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female
reader, Addi  +, writes (2 April 2008):
To be honest with you and what I'm about to say may seem shallow. But i would remain friends with him until i get my money back.
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (1 April 2008):
 No, you are not being a cow. You should be earning interest from him as well (to offset what you are paying on your overdraft) and you should have had all of this put in writing. I don't blame you for losing interest in him after you have seen how he has treated you now that you have requested that he pay you back. You were a good friend, but there is a very good reason why there is that old saying about "Friends don't lend friends money." - It's because it always affects the friendship OR the relationship. Always put any loan down in writing. Unfortunately, we all learn this the hard way. Chalk it up to experience - AFTER he pays you back - of course...
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A
female
reader, HElPFUl AsHlEy AsK mE QUESTi0NS +, writes (1 April 2008):
 You aren't being a cow at all! 2 and a half grand is a LOT of money...Like x-kitycatlok-x said... Well sweety its a tuffie' but i wouldnt ever say youre being a COW youre doing the best you can and thats all you can do for now. =]Ashley
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A
female
reader, Jmo +, writes (1 April 2008):
 I agree with your mom. If you were to even consider getting back with him, you should wait until he's paid you back. First of all you said that the arguments that caused you to split revolved around this issue. Secondly, if you're back together he may feel less pressure to pay you what he owes you in a timely manner. Last (and possibly most importantly) you said you "don't see him that way anymore". What else needs to be said?
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A
female
reader, x-kitycatlok-x +, writes (1 April 2008):
 You aren't being a cow at all! 2 and a half grand is a LOT of money! You're doing the right thing about refusing to be with him until he's paid it back, and even then I don't think getting back together is an option. If he's done it once, who's to say he won't do it again?!?! You're doing the right thing! Keep it up!Wishing you the bestxx
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