A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:A guy I dated for 5 years dumped me via text a week before we were supposed to move in together. I loved him so much and truthfully still do. My question is why every few months he will send me a casual facebook message just saying that he hopes I'm well etc. I just don't see the point. Its been about a year and to my dismay I still think about him and get really upset on occassion. In my most recent upset all I wanted to do was contact him and tell him how much I still miss him hoping that even now things could turn around. I know its probably a bad idea, but what if it isn't? We haven't had any contact in about 3 months...I know I seem crazy but I was so in love and still am. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2012): I think you should contact him OP, send naked pictures of yourself to him, phone his mother crying and beg her to convince him to go back with you, sell all your possessions buy a tent and camp outside his house, shave your head and get his name tattooed to your forehead.
OP none of those ideas are good ones are they? Not even the first one.
Has he ever told you why he broke up with you in that way?
Perhaps you need closure on this issue and OP why the hell haven't you blocked him on Facebook? How are you supposed to get over someone if you can see in detail what they are doing with their lives, pining over new photos etc. Of course you're not over him and of course you still get upset he and his friends are still very much a part of your life.
He doesn't deserve the chance to talk to you or message you after what he did and he's not even giving you a chance to move on because of that.
OP what good can come from you getting back together? Do you really think you can ever recapture the love you once had but he definitely doesn't have for you? If you didn't still have such strong feelings for him would you give him another chance? No because you know he doesn't deserve that and he doesn't deserve to be part of your life anymore. So block him on facebook, block his friends that aren't really your friends either and get on with your life. Stop logging in and hoping the next message will be from him. Block him and you get rid of that feeling and you can let go.
A
female
reader, Trinklett  +, writes (16 April 2012):
 He chips in a line once in a while when he's less busy and hasn't got much on his hands. Forget about him. Hard but possible. And don't forget to block him on Facebook so he can't send you those casual and annoying messages.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2012): I think the reason he keeps sending you casual facebook messages is because he feels guilty for being such a coward in how he ended things with you, so by casually messaging you he's hoping you will respond and reassure him that you're doing fine so he can ease his guilt.
another possibility is that he wants to get back together but is too embarrassed to broach the subject because he knows he was a coward and jerk in how he treated you. So he's sending you these casual messages so he doesn't have to apologize and can pretend things are all going well between you two, hoping you will reply in a friendly tone and thereby ease into a 'real' conversation where he can broach the subject of wanting to get back together.
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A
female
reader, Eilish  +, writes (16 April 2012):
 Well first off I'm truely sorry to hear about how this turned out.I know you may not like my answer, but truth is you shouldn't show your weakness and chase after him. Remember he ended things with you for a reason and if he really wanted to try again wouldn't he be making the first move?I'm in a similar situation. The guy I just broke up with I am madly in love with, and he keeps trying to get into contact with me. I just keep ignoring him though because this is the 3rd time he has hurt me and I need to start having pride in myself. By letting him go, I'm thinking about whats best for me.You can't keep beating yourself up about it in thinking what could of happened. Just remember everything happens for a reason and it may not seem like it now but he may have ended it in order for you to meet the right person. I know being in love is hard, and by him mailing you doesn't help the situation. To be fair, I think you should be strong and tell him if he has no intention of ever working things out to cut contact with you completely, because by talking to him it will only bring back reminders and make you feel worse.In my opinion I think you need to be strong, put yourself first for once, cut contact and move on. This guy hurt you once, don't make the mistake of taking him back thinking he won't do it again. Thats what I did and I'm going through it for a 3rd time.Really hope you're ok and I hope I helped xx
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (16 April 2012):
 Honey he DUMPED you via text? After 5 years together? I really think it's time you let him go.
What you are holding on to is a fantasy.
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