A
male
age
36-40,
*isk
writes:HiI've been seeing this girl for the past two months, and everything is great. We both just got out of bad relationships, and feel like we know what we want and don't want.We both communicate well together, and even the topic of jealousy has been discussed. I told her that now I feel like jealousy is a fleeting feeling for me now, it comes and passes on by ...However, we were talking on the phone the other night, and I was just reminiscing of some childhood memories and mentioned one of my childhood friends. She immediately asked his name, and went on facebook to check him out.This bothers me, and this time I am shy to tell her how I feel about that. Normally this would pass me by, but it's bothering me and I HATE IT!I feel like I need time to think things over, some space to think things through before this gets out of hand. We are supposed to go out to the bar tomorrow with a friend, which I am NOT looking forward too, especially after this. :(
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female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (28 February 2010):
 Glad I could help a little and I hope you guys are very happy together :)
A
male
reader, Risk +, writes (28 February 2010):
Risk is verified as being by the original poster of the questionfollowtheblackrabbit,
Thank you for the sound advice. I like some of your approaches, and especially from a female perspective :)
Well, heres an update, I slept over this issue and the next morning I felt a little better, I kept telling myself that Life is too short to worry about things like this. To just enjoy my life and hope for the best.
So, the next day we went out with her friend, I made her night extra special. I bought her flowers and chocolates and wrote her a note :)
At the end of the day, what really matters is when she comes into my arms.
Thank you for the advice, I appreciate.
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A
female
reader, followtheblackrabbit +, writes (28 February 2010):
Well, first off, it's normal to feel that way, after getting out of a bad relationship, there's always a little fear that the following on-the one that's going great-is going to get messed up too. It could be that your girlfriend found whatever you had to say about this friend so funny or interesting, she just wanted to put a face to the story. I think maybe you might need to tell her that. But, approach it in a sweet way. Just be like, "I'm having such a great time with you, I really don't feel like sharing you with anyone else. You're so beautiful, can you blame me for being a tiny bit jealous? I love it when I have you all to myself." And then, do something tender, just the two of you, cuddle up to watch a movie. ANd try to think of other ways to bypass this issue. Are you bothered by, for example, her bringing along some of her friends too to hangout? That might make the situation better. In the meantime, until you two are more settled, it might be better simply not to introduce her to more friends and hangout in groups. Until you feel comfortable, until you're more sure, that prickle of jealousy is going to linger. So just avoid those situations for now. Hope this helps and best of luck. xx
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