A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi all,I would really love some help on this one please......I recently found out that my Boyfriend of nearly two years is in love with his friend ( has been for 8 years) the things is they are thousands of miles apart. so of course I am very upset and sad about this but of course still love him very much..so I said to him he needs to find out what she wants and to ask if she wants the same....so he does this and I know cause I have seen his Emial ( not proud that I did this ) she said thet she did not want him and that she loves him as a friend but could never see them being together forever basicaly she does not see him like that but still loves him as a friend. so he has found out and he text me and says she does not want me and now I need to get on with my life....so I was like ok well what about me......see he still wants to be with me and take it slow....but he is still Emailing her saying how he could never talk to anyone like her and how he is thankful for her being honest but still wants contact and she is emailing back with this I wil always be here for you and who knows what the furture will bring for us ( like she is giving hope again )blah blah.....I know this is my own fault for looking at stupid Emails.....I am now thinking should I have held on because all I feel like now is second best and he is mopping around like his been dumped and like I am sposed to feel sorry for him.....I know in my heart of hearts I should just walk away but when you love someone its not that easy.....PLEASE HELP
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female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (15 September 2009):
 I would walk away, you are the "consolation prize" not the one he really wants to be with. Which means, he will stick it out with you till SHE or someone "better" comes along.
Why settle?
Specially for a man who isn't 100% into you?
Just because his friends said she doesn't want him, doesn't mean he stops loving her.
I'm so sorry.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2009): i would walk away, i know its hard and takes alot to do it when you love them, but, can you see yourself being truly happy with him when you know that she was his first choice?
seeing what he has lost in you might just shake him up but really find someone who wants you and only you, he is out there.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2009): This does sound really upsetting for you. And yes, you're right, you should walk away. I know its not easy but you need to think in the long run it would be better for you. This guy isent being fair. If hes been in love with his friend for 8 years and got with you 2 years ago then he already loved her when he became your boyfriend. I think you just need to be strong and walk away and find someone whos gonna love you and just you :) Hope everything goes okay! x
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