A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:There is this girl who I spent 2 1/2 months with this summer. We both worked at a summer camp and really hit it off. I kept getting the feeling that she really liked me and I definitely liked her. She would laugh at my jokes and we would tease each other throughout the day. However, I recently found out that she has a boyfriend already. She goes to school very far away from me but we've been texting each other every other night since summer. I really want to be with her badly but I don't want to come outright and say that to her. I don't want to scare her off. I am feeling awful because I am not sure if I am ever going to have a chance with her. How can I cope with this jealousy and let her know without outright telling her that I really like her? Would it be good or bad if I took her to fun places when she came home from school in December?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2012): Hi everyone, this is the Asker. I don't know if this is the correct format to write a followup in so sorry haha! But I wanted to thank everyone that answered. I got PLENTY of information from all of you and you all gave different aspects which is great! Thank you all so much. I'm just going to stay confident and continue being a close friend until she thinks the time is right on her own. I'm willing to wait a couple years ;) Thanks again for all of your help!
A
female
reader, highheeledfeminist +, writes (19 September 2012):
 Here's the thing.As a girl, I know there is NOTHING worse than wondering how a guy feels about us. You are so confusing! In a good way :) but we just have different brains. My friends and I declared that if any one of us is ever elected president, we will make a law that makes men post their thoughts on a board above their head.Seriously though. I think you should be as clear as you can with her that you like her. Make it obvious--make it easy for HER to share her feelings for YOU if she has them. We don't like to make the first move. We grow up thinking that's not how it works. But if she's texting you that often, I think you can be confident that there's something there. In the months before I broke up with my ex I was frequently texting my current interest; she may be into you but holding onto the old guy for fear that if she dumps him you may not like her after all and then she'd be alone! And no one likes that. All that being said, I would not just TELL her "I like you" or something like that because since she is still dating this other guy, that puts her in a really awkward position. There is no right answer because she shouldn't betray him while they are still together but she also wants to be honest with you. So let THAT conversation happen on her terms.Good luck!!
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A
female
reader, nat1972  +, writes (19 September 2012):
 I think you have a very good friendship with her. Don't confuse your feelings though. You are both young and both have so much to learn from life. If in December do take her out, but as a friend. Because you are young, Long Distant Relationship probably wont work because you both need to experience life more. In my honest opinion I would keep her as a really close friend as you are, and then in a few years time, if you both feel the same way take it further and develop the relationship.
In December, also you will know how she feels about your friendship, things will automatically grow between you both if something is to happen.
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