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Am I wasting my best years by not having sex?

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Question - (22 November 2007) 14 Answers - (Newest, 26 November 2007)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I'm in my teens. Now is the best time to be having Sex, and I'm not! I was not so long ago, and I think I took Sex for granted because I was enjoying my girlfriends company so much.

Am I wasting my best years?? Do many guys suffer this when it comes by?? Should I be suffering???? Please help me, I'm confused.

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A female reader, BadAsh6705 United States +, writes (26 November 2007):

BadAsh6705 agony auntIn my opinion, sex is better when it's with the right person and the more you have sex with that person, the better it gets because you learn what each other like.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2007):

You have gotten a head start on the excitement in bed, but there is still more to go, like vibrators and feathers. My wife likes all except the whipped cream, although cold whipped cream does get a nice scream :) I really don't know how many women like these sorts of things. My wife likes to experiment, as do I. However, neither of us had done these kinds of things with anyone else. My first wife and I didn't do much like this, but not necessarily because she didn't like it. We just never tried. One of my girlfriends liked "kinky" stuff like this, but we didn't go together for very long, so we didn't try much. She did talk about how her first husband and her used to do these kinds of things. I was just too shy back then to suggest that we do it.

Perhaps some of the women can say if they like things like handcuffs, whipped cream, vibrators, feathers, etc. Just a wild guess, but I would bet that a lot of women would like to experiment like this.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

As little as it is of me, I guess I'm a little worried about the Sex I recieve as well. My last girlfriend was pretty good in bed (not that I have anyone to compare her to), and we both enjoyed exploring different sexual activities together. Not going into detail, but we'd use things like Handcuffs and whiped cream, ect. (Not trying to gross anybody out)

Me and her were into stuff like that even though we are only in our late teens. If what you're saying is true, wouldn't that mean that Sex with her would only get more and more exciting? Not all girls enjoy stuff like that, and I guess I worry that I won't meet another girl who I connect so well with in bed.

What do you think?

p.s. Many thanks for everyone who have helped me so far.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2007):

You are definately not wasting your time not having sex right now, and this is not your prime time for great sex. Right now is actually the worst time, in my opinion, because you most likely don't really know what you want right now and it would just add more confusion to your life. I'm 22 now, lost my virginity to my fiance, at that time my boyfriend, when I was 19. I was glad that I had waited until I was more mature, and I can't wait for my late 20's when I really hit my sexual peak.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2007):

To OP - You are so right that having someone nice is better than the sex. I've been lucky to have had relationships with 5 women. The sex was good, but the companionship and having someone to be with, hug and cuddle was even better than the sex. I also had a one night stand for sex only. The sex was OK, but not worth ever doing that again.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

To everyone: Thanks so much for the advice and opinions. I suppose I do have my whole life ahead of me, and so I don't need to be in any hurry to have Sex now. In saying that, once you've had something, it's difficult not to want it after it's been taken away! One thing I'm happy to share is that I miss having a girlfriend more than I miss having Sex, so this means next time I have Sex will hopefully be with somebody I love, again. I'd much rather it that way. Still, waiting is hard!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2007):

You are not wasting your time by not having sex now. I didn't have my first sex until I was 21. The best sex I have ever had was when in my late 30s and now in my early 60s. Both of these were with the same woman, earlier my girlfriend and later my wife. The best sex was probably in our 30s, sometimes 3 times a day on weekends. The most exciting is now, in our early 60s.

You have a lifetime of sex to look forward to. It will get better as time goes on. Maybe not 3 times a day, but still even better.

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A female reader, bexy_cutebabe United Kingdom +, writes (22 November 2007):

Hello,

I think that you are not wasting you time by not having sex. Sex is something that can be wasted its something that can only get better with time and to be perfectly honest with you its not something that you should rush into. You also sound guilty for spending toomuch time with your girl friend but to be quite frank i wiswh that more guys would spend more time with their loved ones. So dont rush into anything and dont worry about sex to much it will hapen when it happens. All the Best Rebecca

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A female reader, sexi South Africa +, writes (22 November 2007):

sexi agony auntHi

No you are no wasting anything. You just enjoying your life. I think you should only have sex when you are ready and it should be with someone that you really love and have a stable relationship. I dont think you should go out and have sex b/c everyone else is doing it. If you do it for the wrong reasons you would end up regretting it.

Regards,mail me if you wanna talk

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2007):

Where did you ever get the idea the best time to have sex is in your teens? Most teens are battling an intense rush of hormones. Hormones never made a good lover, actually more often it makes an impatient lover, which is a dull lover.

It is normal to feel the intense drive that those hormones are pumping through your body, but please don't kid yourself that these are the best years.

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A male reader, chlez83 Zambia +, writes (22 November 2007):

I know how you think and feel but don't feel pressured into having sex.Just because others are having sex don't mean you ought to as well.Sex is best enjoyed with someone you love who feels the same way about you.That's what you should be looking at then sex will come automatically.Sex is more complicated than it sounds and the support of a loving caring partner can make things easier for you.So my advice to you is to relax and not feel pressured.You may look back and wish you had taken things slower.RELAX.

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A female reader, hello1 United Kingdom +, writes (22 November 2007):

hello1 agony auntWhat? you want to be having sex all the time, is that what you mean?? I'm confused as you had a g/f a short while ago so you shouldn't be worrying about not gettung any and wasting your best years.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2007):

You're not wasting your "best years." You can enjoy sex at any age. In fact, it's something you'll be doing for the rest of your life. Don't be in a hurry.

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A female reader, muffy United States +, writes (22 November 2007):

muffy agony aunthunney,anytime is ok to have sex except when your like below age or whatever.you are not wasting your life not having sex!! you just enjoy having your friends instead of your horomones right now. guys suffering isnt really suffering.they just really want it and if they get used to it then theyll want it more and it'll get old.so sure they think therr suffering but your doing them a favor.and your doing yourself a favor.you dont have to b in2 sex right now and you r definetly NOT wasting your best years.you should be partying in your 20's and drinking and dancing and enjoying every minute uvv it.guys can suffer all they want,theyll get over it and plus if they wanted it that badly then they would just go find some corner working hoe.lol.but no you shouldnt be suffering because you are making great choices.hoes beforr bro's right?

i hope i helped

luv and kisses

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