A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello guys.. i need your advices / help.. so here is my situation : I met this guy online this Sept 26th. 2011..he is a US NAVY but he is in Japan for 3 years,but going back to USA this december.. we always chat everyday, we text during his duty.. and we both like each other.. we say sweet words to each other..hes so nice, he met my family and friends when we were video chatting on skype.. last night. i opened up..i told him my feelings for him is starting to grow..and i am falling for him.. but he just told me to just stay slow and never rush things.. coz he said its better to have a good foundation so it would be unbreakable.. and i realized hes probably right, so now what shall i do? am i pushing him too hard to have relationship with me? or should i just wait for him to come to my country then see what will happen? i really like him a lot.. i dont wanna wait too long coz i met loose him.. i really need you help guys.. Hope you can help me :)Thank you for the time reading this and giving me advice :) very much appreciated :)God bless u all
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for that great advice Denise32..anyways, i feel so bad today.. he just told me that we should stop the communication coz this isnt working out.. coz he is upset right now.. he cant come to my country.. i have pain in my heart right now.. he gave up already.. what shall i do? i so hurt really .. please give me some advice :) thank you
A
female
reader, Denise32  +, writes (12 October 2011):
 I would advise you not to get your hopes up and build up a fantasy of what it might be like to have a future with this man!You met him less than a month ago, and though you have talked on Skype, you have not met in person. Who knows if you ever WILL meet face to face? Remember, YOU are living in the Philippines; HE'S stationed in Japan and will return to the United States in two months.A relationship needs lots of time together in person, over the course of at least a year to grow and develop. What are the prospects that you and he could have that kind of time together? Slim to none, I'd guess, even assuming you might have the air fare to travel to Japan to spend a few days with him.No, I'm sorry but you appear to be getting your hopes up, and are afraid of "loosing" (you mean LOSING) him.Just enjoy your daily chats and Skype and regard him as no more than a friend.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you Ladies :) i know what to do now! and yes u are all right.. i should take this slow.. i guess i need to think more if i really want to be with a guy in forces.. coz yeah it sounds to be a lonely life.. well we will see how this goes.. Thank you again! :)
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female
reader, KittieS  +, writes (11 October 2011):
 Agree with the other ladies, right now it's all sweet words and that can make us ladies weak at the knees - but it's not a relationship not yet anyway, you may feel totally different when you see him.I'd also suggest cooling things down, but you should also look to date other men maybe?? I'm not suggesting anything sexual, but coffee or drinks don't pin your hopes on just an Internet based relationship I would hate for you to get hurt. Sometimes (and I'm not saying thesis the case) men say things like you describe too slowly but gently put us down, nice men don't want to hurt our feelings Abd he does sound like a nice man - but he may just be looking for female companionship so please keep this in your mind.You seem like a nice lady, and I truly hope it works out for you - but think about what your future really would be like with this man, with him being in the forces (being a forces lady is sometimes a very lonely place to be) decide is this really the life for you. Take things slowly and let him come to youI wish you all the best x
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2011): I think you are rushing things. For now just be friends, see what happens. I don't think you're pushing him away necessarily. It's just that there are a lot of obsticles to your relationship. Seperate nationalities is hard enough, having someone in the armed forced is hard enough. Together both are very difficult!
After only two weeks, it is good advice to go slow and just see what happens from there, don't push for a relationship now.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 October 2011):
 Aunt Honesty is right... 2 weeks ago is NOTHING and you met online.. you are probably not more than a lovely young lady to chat with...
do not invest your hopes dreams or life plans with this man yet... give it way more time.
right now be casual and have fun... no long term plans.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (11 October 2011):
 26th of September? That was only two weeks ago! Yes you are moving way to fast. This guy is in the navy and off course he is probably seeking company but if I am honest with you I don't see it ever being more than company for him while he is away. I might be wrong and maybe you have found love. But yes you do need to slow down before you get yourself hurt. Talking over the internet is all good but it will be different when you are face to face with each other. Take things slowly before you do scare him off completely. Just get to know him and see how it goes, but please don't expect to much!
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