A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm 18 and recently split up with a boy I was going out with for 4 months. I thought he cared about me and he started off really nice but as soon as we made it official he wasn't as attentive - not calling for days etc. whenever i mentioned why he hadnt called he would say i was just moaning. things went really downhill after he left me in the lurch a few times and i was waiting for days for him to call (he wouldnt answer my calls or texts) and when he finally surfaced he would say he was with his mates and i was asking for too much attention (i really dont think i'm high maintenance!) Anyway, he was the first boy i waited with because before him i used to jump straight into bed, but with him i waited weeks to kiss and further weeks to have sex. he was pretty immature in bed in that he constantly had an erection, and would check i was good to go then just get on with it if you know what i mean! but i didnt mind at the time. I broke up with him and subsequently found out that everyone around me thought he was a bit of a d*ckhead cos he told people he was just with me for the sex and wanted to have sex with other girls. since this, he has been so horrible to me and i have changed my number so he will leave me alone. he yells at me if he sees me on campus talking to boys. Anyway, i pretty much jumped straight into bed with another boy cos i just feel like i waited for my ex and he turned out to put me through the most stress ever. i feel like i will never find a decent boyfriend and in the mean time i am 18 and have sexual needs!!! i feel like i'm stuck in a vicious circle, and i cant help myself, but i object to being called a slag because at the end of the day i like sex! but on the other hand i know its not making me happy! please help!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2009): your not a slag stop calling yourself one
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2009): You're not a slag, but it might be a better idea to get over him before you go sleeping around, it will only make you feel better for an instant and after a while, and the you might feel cheap and used.
Better to wait, satisfy yourself for a while and start dating again when you're ready.
Get on with other things and keep yourself busy but don't be afraid to go over what happened in your mind talk it to death with friends, it will help you get over him quicker, when you get fresh perspective on things.
Be careful sleeping aorund too, safe sex-wise and reputation-wise. Being known as a slag attracts all the wrong guys and it will make it all that much harder not to end up with another asshole.
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