A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am about to meet up with an old friend the same age as me. He remembers me fondly, we went out once 40 years ago. I am probably fairly attractive, but I wear a hearing aid and have false teeth. I have already put him off once but am meeting this weekend. He has seen photos of me. Do I meet him and keep quiet on first meeting about teeth and ears? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (28 September 2010):
 You were worried about telling him you have a hearing aid and dentures, but yet, not about your adultery?
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (28 September 2010):
 Well maybe his comment about you "dating" a married man hit a soft spot? I won't get on my high horse about affairs and cheating, but he might not agree with your morals and values, if you think it's OK to date a married man.. ( no matter how "horrible" his wife/marriage is)
At least you got over the initial scare of meeting him.
...............................
A
female
reader, mystiquek + ♥, writes (24 September 2010):
 Aw sweetie..I'm sorry it didn't have a more happy ending for you! But look at it this way..now you know. What if you had never met up again? You would have always been wondering and asking the big "WHAT IF"??? SO you found out he's not for you, and that's ok. I'm glad you did it!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell,I went out with him twice. Turns out his ex wife wore hearing aids! So that was ok. He has a front tooth missing, and was not fussed about doing anything about it! I told him about a previous relationship I had had since my husband died - with a married man - he was very judgemental about it. Made me feel like a loose woman! Well that is it now. 59, and forever single!!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to all who answered. I feel a bit better. I will meet him this weekend. I turned 59 last week, he is 5 months younger. We went to the same church years ago,different branches, but the type of church where everyone knows everyone else.Neither of us go now. He works about 3 hours away from me. I had an email from him last week to say he always had a crush on me, but I was always taken, then I think maybe he still thinks I am the popular young thing I was at church. Anyway I am not fat, but not thin either, friends at work tell me I am "pretty"!! And my daughter thinks I look good, but I don't really think so,I find so much wrong with myself, but I think the best thing is to meet him, if he doesn't want to see me again, so be it. I will give up then! I have been on my own a long time, not really looking for anyone, but he and I have a lot in common, we know the same people through our upbringing in the church. Not sure if I want sex either! Been too long. So glad I found this site. It is good to put my thoughts down. I caught up with him on Facebook. Thanks all very much. x
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2010): Don't mention the false teeth or hearing aids. Like someone else said, it's not even necessary. He's not expecting you to look like a twenty year old. He's knows that you're in your fifties. I don't think this is even something you should be worried about at all. We women beat up on ourselves way too much.
...............................
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (13 September 2010):
 This is one of the most endearing posts Iv read! Honey you dont need to be conscious about anything.Remember that age has caught up with your friend as well...he's not the same as he was 40 yrs back!!and you sound so graceful and confident...there's nothing to worry about. If anything, the hearing aid and false teeth could be the ice-breakers! You can both have a good laugh at how much you guys have changed, and yet how that spark still remains!! Thats the best thing about you!
Have fun on your date! I wish you the very best!!
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (13 September 2010):
Aww you made me smile :) I had my first hearing aid at 35, I unfortunately have a degenerative defect in the tiny bones in my ears, which resulted in loss of hearing. Not total loss, but I'm sure I will get there at some point. I didn't want surgery ( since it's a fix, not permanent correction).
I wouldn't tell him about the teeth and hearing right of the bat, but both can be a GREAT & (if you can laugh at yourself a little) FUNNY ice breaker.
Go meet him, he's gotten older too you know ;)
...............................
A
female
reader, MrsP26  +, writes (13 September 2010):
You write that you are "Probably fairly attractive", this would imply that you are quite confident in your everyday life. You have not seen this man for a long time i take it, so therefor you are having hang-up's because you are trying to live up to an image you had years ago. You will have changed, as will he, and no matter what age we are we all have hang ups, as I'm sure you did years ago too. Just remember to be confident of yourself, you are who you are and if anything happens it will be because you are both comfortable with each other, you do not need to justify anything, and remember, there is every chance he will be equally as nervous as yourself, he is of course human too. xx
...............................
A
female
reader, mystiquek + ♥, writes (13 September 2010):
Sweetie...do yourself a favor and stop worrying so much. I am close in age to you and I really do understand what you are feeling...trust me. Age brings us unwelcome gifts, doesnt it? But surely he has aged too, don't forget that. He may be older, grayer, heavier, balder?? Right? And if you are feeling insecure, don't you think he may have the same reservations? Of course he may! You have sent a picture, so he has a pretty good idea what you look like, so its not like you are hiding things. Don't sweat the small stuff, and I wouldn't mention the teeth or the hearing aid at this point, I don't think its necessary. He may have some small "secrets" of his own. Please just enjoy the day, take it a step at a time and see what happens.Take a deep breath, smile..... Just BE YOURSELF! I hope you have an absolutely lovely time! Good luck!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2010): Your friend will of aged too, how do you know that he hasn't the same as you? Don't put the meeting off, go and enjoy meeting up with your friend. As for telling him see how you feel, when you are together.
...............................
|
