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Advice regarding my parents punishment for my behavior

Tagged as: Family, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 April 2023) 14 Answers - (Newest, 29 May 2023)
A female age 13-15, *ouise1234 writes:

I would like some advice from parents please ? i must admit my behavour over the past 2 weeks has been very poor last weekend i was grounded for general bad behavour, i ignored my parents and sneaked out of the house to go to a party, my friends and i drunk alcohol ( iam underage ) i tried to sneak back into the house DRUNK at 2am my parents went mad they said my older sister who is 21 walked the streets looking for me , my parents said they were on the brink of calling the police, to make matters worse i swore at my mum, the next morning i feal terrible, my parents then gave me a lecture and said that i needed disipline and punishment, they said for the time being i could not be trusted as i had sneaked out and got drunk they were concerned about my safety, they said they had no option but to lock me in my bedroom at weekends as a punishment as well as safety, they have said i will serve 6 weekends locked up but this could be cut to 4 weekends if i behave, i have been locked in my room all day and i dont like it i know its a punishment but its hard, i am not allowed tv phone etc, i have my pc for a limited time only , its supposed to be for homework only, my parents have said that they are concerned about my behavour and future thats why they are punishing me, my sister says my punishment is long overdue, she says i have caused much worry to my parents and i deserve to be punished ADVICE PLEASE ?

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (29 May 2023):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntHave you really got nothing better to do than making up silly posts, which are not even original but so obviously all from the same person? Perhaps your time would be better spent taking a creative writing course.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2023):

http://www.dearcupid.org/question/are-my-parents-right-to-punish-me-with.html

A female United Kingdom age 18-21, koolkelly12 writes:

"IS IT RIGHT THAT MY PARENTS HAVE PUT ME IN PRISON ? AND ARE THEY BEING MEAN FOR NOT LETTING ME GO OUT INTO OUR GARDEN ?

I got caught shoplifting, my parents said they don't want to see me go to jail, so are punishing me severely, they have sentenced me to 2 weeks imprisonment, I am confined to my room and my bedroom door is locked, we are having a heatwave and I have been SHUT away in my room for 4 days, I am BORED , FED UP and VERY miserable, because its so hot and sunny I asked my parents if I could go and sit in the garden for a couple of hours, they said NO NO NO my punishment is to have my freedom taken away which means NO going out and that's the end of it I have stay in my room and my bedroom door stays locked.

IS THIS PUNISHMENT FAIR ?

DO YOU THINK I SHOULD BE ALLOWED OUT INTO THE GARDEN ?"

Follow-up post dated 7/29/2018:

koolkelly12 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

"my parents have set me essays to write, 1 is a 6 page essay on why its wrong to steal, and a 6 page essay on anacceptable behaviour and punishments, I also have to write a letter of apology to the shop keeper who called my parents instead of the police."

This isn't a coincidence. If you were "18-21" then you'd be 23-26 by now; and if you were really 13-15, you would be 18-20 now. I know rehashed posts when I see them. Seems your parents still have their hands full, whatever your real age happens to be!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2023):

"but my parents said NO NO NO , my punishment is to lose my freedom which means NO going out of anykind, DO I DESERVE THIS ?"

You've asked these same questions before a long time ago. The answer in a real situation like this is "yes!" Who here can cancel your parents? If anybody did agree with you, what would your parents do in response to it? I do remember you, my dear!

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A female reader, louise1234 +, writes (21 April 2023):

louise1234 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i got home from school an hour ago, i was escorted to my bedroom by my older sister and locked in, i will remain in my room until monday morning, apart from bathroom breaks of course my bedroom door will be LOCKED at ALL times, this is my punishment for poor behavour, the punishment is HARD and i DONT like it, my parents say that this is the whole point of being punished so i learn from my mistakes and never misbehave again, so tomorrow i have to write a 4 page essay on what i am learning from being punished, on sunday i have to write a 4 page essay on what i have learnt from being punished and am i likely to offend again if so then the punishment must be more severe, i have another 5 weekends to serve but my parents say this could be cut if i behave, my older sister who is 21 says i am getting my just desserts and deserve to be punished, being locked up is hard PLEASE BE HONEST IN YOUR ANSWERS PLEASE ?

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A female reader, louise1234 +, writes (21 April 2023):

louise1234 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i have said sorry to my parents and have promised to behave, my parents say they are have to lock me in my room to keep me safe as well as to punish, now i have a new problem i have just recieved an invitation to my cousins birhtday party in saturdays time its at a safari park and it sounds so much fun, my parents have said i cant go because i am being punished, i have begged my parents to me go i have said sorry a hundred times i even put on the waterworks, but my parents said NO NO NO , my punishment is to lose my freedom which means NO going out of anykind, DO I DESERVE THIS ?

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A female reader, louise1234 +, writes (21 April 2023):

louise1234 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thank you Arielle for your answer i know punishment is not supposed to be fun but it was very hard just looking at 4 walls all of last weekend, when i return home from school on friday afternoon i will be locked in my room until monday morning i will have only school books and as you know i will have to write more punishment essays, my parents say the punishment MUST be hard to deter future wrongdoing, but i HATE being locked in so much why does my punishment have to be so hard ?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2023):

I remember you. I also remember this post almost word for word; and you sent a followup post explaining how you wanted to go to a party that your parents refused to let you go to. You had to stay locked in your room, and you sassed your parents about it.

You submitted these posts a long time ago; and it would be very unlikely anyone would submit a post citing the exact same incident with the exact same punishment given by your parents; which included writing the essay and everything else. We have good memories here at DearCupid; and we know sometimes rascals resubmit the same posts again and again. If your post is real, and you are actually the age you say you are; I hope you will learn a good lesson from your parents.

Only in the case of abuse or physical assault would readers, uncles, or aunts go against the punishments prescribed by the parents of young posters to this site. In such cases, we would suggest the victim of child-abuse contact a helpline, inform a trusted family-member, a teacher, or the police in extreme cases. This was appropriate punishment for someone 13-15 years old. I will just humor the author of these posts; and respond to them as I would any other authentic post.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2023):

You are very lucky you have such caring parents, your parents were very unlucky when they ended up with you - a childish and irresponsible, selfish person who is nothing but problems, hassle and worry. I hope that when you are a bit older you get a job and leave home -for their sake. AND don't return to them when you want help or advice or money. If you carry on as you are that will be the life ahead of you. Nothing but problems that you bring on yourself. Don't bring them on your poor parents too.

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A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (17 April 2023):

mystiquek agony auntI am a parent of 2 grown children. I a so grateful that my kids never pulled any stunts like you did. I would have been absolutely horrified! I think the punishment your parents have given you is quite fair and to honest, they let you off rather easily. Your parents care about you and want you to understand what you did and how dangerous it really was. So many bad things could have happened to you! LEARN from this...don't hold it against your parents or far worse things could happen to you in the future! Don't be a burden...be a joy to your family. Who wants to sit up at night terrified of where their child is? Wondering if they are going to come home at all??? Be SMART!!!

I really doubt if you are going to get anyone on here to take your side. What you did was incredibly foolish.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2023):

Sounds like fair punishment to me. See it from their perspective, they care about you and don't want to see you get hurt. If you go out and get drunk with you friends there is a chance you could get injured and nobody will know. Also, alcohol is very bad for your health (it causes cancer). I suggest you thank your parents for caring about you enough to punish you this way.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2023):

Not sure why you're coming to a DearCupid? You've explained what you did, and how your parents chose to discipline you.

The advice I give you is to listen to your parents. How you behaved was way out of line, and not typical of someone your age. It seems you're going to be a problem for a while; if what you described in your post is the kind of things you would do.

There is nothing anyone at DC needs to add to what your parents feel is necessary to discipline you. I feel sorry for your parents, that you would do something you knew would be so dangerous and irresponsible. I truly hope this is not an indication of the kind of person you plan to become, and the kind of problems they will need to deal with from now on.

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A female reader, louise1234 +, writes (16 April 2023):

louise1234 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thank you for your answer, part of my punishment is to write a 4 page punishment essay each day, yesterday i had to write an essay on the dangers of underage drinking and today a 4 page essay on unaceptable behavour and punishments, my parents say they want me to learn from my punishment and thats what the essays are for do you agree with this idea ?

ps i DONT like this punishment its MISREABLE ?

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A female reader, louise1234 +, writes (16 April 2023):

louise1234 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thank you for your answer, part of my punishment is to write a 4 page punishment essay each day, yesterday i had to write an essay on the dangers of underage drinking and today a 4 page essay on unaceptable behavour and punishments, my parents say they want me to learn from my punishment and thats what the essays are for do you agree with this idea ?

ps i DONT like this punishment its MISREABLE ?

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (16 April 2023):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntYou really need advice? You are at least 13 (according to your profile) so you are not clueless. You are a danger to yourself and a worry to your parents. You behaved disgracefully and worried them needlessly and now you need to take your punishment with grace and vow to be more responsible in the future.

For the record, I think they have been far too lenient on you. If you were my daughter, your punishment would be far harsher and I would be making you read about what can happen to out of control young girls who get blind drunk. You could have been raped or murdered. You need to wake up before you get into serious trouble.

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