A
female
age
51-59,
*rtofgold
writes:my boyfriend and i have been together for 7 yrs. i'm 40 and he's 38.Most of the relationship has been very abusive both physical and emotional. He's been arrested 3 times as a result. his family treats me well as long as there's barbecues,parties,or if they're in need of a favor. When the abuse gets out of control and i do what i need to do to protect myself,they turn on me and tell me what i should have done.I made it clear to boyfriend that i will not put up with his behavior anymore,and this is his last chance to change his ways. I do not want any further association with his family,i'm fed up with everything and everybody. I'm wondering if there's any hope for our future without his family. they only call him when i'm not around and vise versa.I always feel that they're planning or scheming up something.I'm very angry and depressed...any advice would help me alot.
View related questions:
depressed Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, babymama99 +, writes (3 June 2009):
 "I'm wondering if there's any hope for our future without his family."There is no hope for the future with him...Really 7 years??? that's way too long. one second after the first abusive episode was too long. arrested 3X and still beating on you. he will not stop!Of course his family is going to believe everything he tells them and stand up for him. you need to stand up for YOURSELF. I'd rather be alone and happy for the rest of my life than to be with someone unhappy and constantly abused. that's horrible.PLEASE listen to us and LEAVE!!His family should not even on the list of concerns, they are enablers.
A
male
reader, Beingblack  +, writes (3 June 2009):
 I'm right with Grimm on this one. I don't understand why you are still with a man who has battered you, been arrested over it, and continues to do so.
The trouble is, you let him get away with it, so he will continue to do it.
He will never change.
So you have to leave. It's as simple as that.
If you think he will change, you are fooling yourself.
I understand that you have fear about what to do, where to go, how you will manage etc.
Understand this.
He will continue to beat you, and it will get worse. I know two men like this. They do not stop, until they have finally caused serious injury.
I hope you do the right thing.
...............................
A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (3 June 2009):
 What do you mean any future? did you read your own question?
It's simple.....GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE!
You can be angry and depressed later, AFTER you get away form this abusive situation.
Why would you even think about staying around? "Becuase you love him?"
. Time to stand up for yourself and leave these losers alone.
...............................
|
