A
female
age
51-59,
*amsky
writes:I am little bit old to ask question about my long distance relationship with an American guy he lives in Michigan and I live here in Aberta I am Asian. We meet on line and he visited me after a month, he stayed in hotel and he visits me like a suitor and we get to know more for a week. Then after a month I fly to him and see him and vise versa. We text a lot like teenagers, emailed at our work, calling each other never bother about bills later changed all our long distance unlimited plans. We talked everynight before we go to bed and he calls me every morning to say he is thinking about me. me too Likewise. Its been 6 mos. and I become worrier about how we can be together. He told me to marry him so we can be together He is 46 never married, as he said he dont want to end up Divorced, but he is ready now he has a grown up kid 23yrs old now and I am 37 I am Annulled with a 15 yr old daughter lives with me. She like him as long as I am happy / He offered me marriage so I can join him to the US he told me not to worry if I wont have ajob He said I can just stay home and if i like later and get adjusted I can work. I dont need to worry about my daughter too since he will provide everything. I told him about how complicated our situation now since we live apart. He told me about being negative to everything and jsut quit it.. Should I accept his proposal as to this early stage? He wants me to stay with him first so I know if I will like his environment, not nicer than out Mountains here. I told him its not the place.. its the person that I like. But he never said "I love you". He said before if he say a word it means a lot to him and he meant it. I am waiting for that. But why does he have to tell me he will marry me so I can join him? I love him but I dont know how to tell him also. Men first? or should I tell him?. We are not getting any younger anyways....
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divorce, long distance, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2008): A trial period, before engagement sounds best. First go to stay with him for a few weeks just to see where and how he lives. Then either you or he should definitely look for a job in the other person's area because you don't want to feel trapped into the relationship.
It's easy to love a person when you're sharing a luxury hotel. But you do need to see what you're in for in the long term before you make the jump, as you both know.
A
female
reader, TELLULAH  +, writes (10 June 2008):
 Hi,
Could you not go and stay a-while before making such a huge comitment. He sounds really nice, and its lovely that he wants to take care of you and daughter, but even so its only been 6 months. If you go and stay and are really happy, you dont have to come back do you?.
I always think its better to be safe than sorry.
Good luck whatever you decide.
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