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I think I just maybe losing my mind in this whole situtaion please help?

Tagged as: Age differences, Big Questions, Dating, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 July 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 1 August 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

What do you do in a situation when you have a boyfriend at home that is older than you and you started out as best friends, eventually moved into a deeper relationship, have a hansome child together and are still good friends, but due to past issues never able to marry you and give you no more children like you would love, then you are starting to realize how much older he is and you are interested in another man at work that is your age and has the same compassion as you, and you know he is also interested.

Meanwhile fire for love making has been dead on your home life for a while and you prentend to be happy but you really are not, and you cant leave because you have to take care of your child's father and help him with his health and he has never did anything wrong or hurt me and anyway, i know this sounds selffish for asking advice but what are you to do when everybody tells you to go were your happy and go with your heart, i wish i could take back 6 years, but then i would of never had my lovly child whom i adore.

i guess that is the price you pay for trying to help somebody with there life and you feel bad and now you are stuck in the situation, then you loose outon actually living your life the way you imagined please help just need someone that has some good advice for me, i am quitting the job the other man that i am attracted to is at because i know if i dont so something may happen, even thought we have already kissed and i did not feel guilty it actually made me feel happy i thought you are supposed to feel awful I think I just maybe losing my mind in this whole situtaion please help?

View related questions: at work, best friend, moved in

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A female reader, LyricStorm United States +, writes (1 August 2010):

LyricStorm agony auntI believe that this is a little selfish you know, We as women always saying we cant find a good man and whem we do we find one we think is better (Not saying either one is better then another) but what i am saying is it is so wrong to play with any ones's emotions and it is selfish to be happy withsomeone else while the person at home is lonely and sad and waiting on you..

You need to decided what it is that you want to do with your love life.. you cant sting 2people around because in the end its gonna cause you the most stress then you will have to live with what you did.

LIke the earlier post said what if he did this to you?? is would cause you so much pain in your heart and soul.. Now take that pain you see and put it on the face of the man you are with at home... Doesnt feel good to hurt someone like that..

Get your love together and seriously make a choice before someone else( meaning another women) steps in and makes the choice for you!!!

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A female reader, meshelle88 United States +, writes (31 July 2010):

meshelle88 agony auntWell, in my opinion, I believe carrying on like you are in love with the father of yóur chíld when is all reality you are not is not selfish at all, but I do also think if YOU were your boyfriend and he was the one sneaking around behind your back with a woman from work while you wére at hóme ill, you'd probally lose it. The best way to fix something or make a decision is to put yourself in the other persons shoes. Sad but true, you can't have it both ways. Before you make any life changing decisions you need to evaluate your future without your current bf and the effects your decision will have on your child. You are a mother, and you have more than just your happiness to think about here. Are you willing to give up the life you have now for some fling (who I am positive will die down) or are you that unhappy and you want out? I mean, tearing your family apart for some guy you work with? If you are 100% sure you are nolonger in live with you bf and he is making you so uñhappy that it affects you how you behave at work and with your child then you need to get out, but dont leaave just to satisfy your own needs, and please, hold off on any physical contact with your co-worker until then. I dont know how múch respect I would have for a man who was fooling around with me behind the back óf his ill live in gf. Have some disipline and self respect!

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A female reader, Moo's Mum New Zealand +, writes (31 July 2010):

Moo's Mum agony auntWhy do you have to look after your child's father? Since you are not married to him you have no obligation to do this. There are other options for him to get help rather than relying on you. Can you move out? I suggest you move out and be your own person for a while instead of trying to please someone else all the time. Don't jump straight into another relationship. Rebound situations often end in tears.

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