My wife slept with my best friend on our annniversary!
Q. my wife slept with my bestfriend, on our 10th year anniversary. We have being married 13 years. She just told me after i found an email from my bestfriend asking her if they could have sex again. I asked her about it and she told me i was not paying ...
A. 24 July 2010: If you dont want it to happen again you better adjust your priorities - Who says the family wants what YOU didnt have growing up? Maybe they just want YOU to be with them more.
There is nothing sadder than to see a woman wither or lay in the arms... (read in full...)
My wife slept with my best friend on our annniversary!
Q. my wife slept with my bestfriend, on our 10th year anniversary. We have being married 13 years. She just told me after i found an email from my bestfriend asking her if they could have sex again. I asked her about it and she told me i was not paying ...
A. 24 July 2010: If you dont want it to happen again you better adjust your priorities - Who says the family wants what YOU didnt have growing up? Maybe they just want YOU to be with them more.
There is nothing sadder than to see a woman wither or lay in the arms... (read in full...)
Is his behavior about control?
Q. My ex-boyfriend is still a bother - why does he insist on finding out what I am doing and with whom? He is jealous of me going out with a guy we both know. But the ex-boyfriend has been living with another woman for over a year! And he doesnt care ...
A. 9 July 2010: Thank you to all who responded to my question. I know it is for the best that I am not with him - But yes I do miss the good stuff. But I gotta keep reminding myself of the bad things.
I guess someday I will get over him and understand why I al... (read in full...)
Should the good guy dump his wife of 20 years for the old girlfriend?
Q. My wife and I just passed our 20th anniversary, we have two girls 10 and 14. My wife has various emotional issues and our home life can often be chaotic. I have always done much of the home work (cooking, keeping an eye on girls' schoolwork, ...
A. 7 July 2010: At 10 and 14 I am sure your girls are already aware that their mothers and fathers relationship is strained at best.
I asked my husband to leave after 15 years of marriage and knew it would be a struggle and it was. I cant speak for you and I di... (read in full...)
Did I handle this situation correctly?
Q. I was just on this dating website chatting to another user, everything was going fine and then he saw me on FACEBOOK, after that he just went cold and blokced me. I sent him a curt email telling him he was immature shallow and not all that attract...
A. 7 July 2010: Well I wouldnt give out my e-mail address on a dating site. I have and with icky results. Most of the guys on there and gals are not worth the time it takes to type to them.
Same with sending your pics.
If it were me I probably wouldnt have gon... (read in full...)
He doesn't have the trappings of a guy in 2010....so?
Q. My kids think there's something wrong with him but I think he's wonderful. He doesn't have a cell phone, TV, internet or friends. Heck even my parents have all that and they're nearly 80. His relationship with his parents is via phone although ...
A. 7 July 2010: I dont think it is fair to judge someone by what they choose to have like a cell phone or internet. But no TV or friends? How does he keep up with world events? What kind of job does he have? What in those LONG TERM relationships just DIDNT WORK? No ... (read in full...)
My 18 year old son is dating someone my age!!
Q. My 18 year old son has started dating a 35 year old woman, which is my age, I am having alot of different feeings, from near break down to breaking her in half. I don't want to do the wrong thing and push him closer to her. I can't imagine dating ...
A. 7 July 2010: How long have they been dating? How well do you know this woman and her situation? Does she have good values? Does your son? Have you ever seen the movie Harold and Maude?
The movie is about a young man dating a woman who is 79! Your son and this... (read in full...)
Is it possible for a woman to want too much sex?
Q. Sex means way too much to me, I know this. And it doesn't come from a good place. It comes from never being touched as a child expect sexually. So I know this isn't just a personality thing. Well it's left me feeling very comforted by sex...
A. 7 July 2010: I read with much pain your question. I too, feel that way and it drove my last bf and I apart. I NEEDED that constant sexual attention and if I didnt get it from him, I sought it from others ( flirting, making sure others thought I was attractive... (read in full...)
My husband thinks I killed his mother by standing up for myself!
Q. I have reached the limit in associating with my in-laws. After 30 years of taking abuse from them, I have decided that I have had enough and I am no longer putting myself at their disposal to allow them to continue treating me badly. I have sp...
A. 20 June 2010: For me penniless and peace of mind won out for sure. It is odd that most people fear that when leaving a relationship, when in actuality, when you have the strength to see that you are ready. The universe seems to provide what you need to make it ... (read in full...)
Does he find normal sex boring?
Q. my boyfriend and i are having issues with sex. I want sex alot but he says that he hates it to often as it gets borin! Im gettin frustrated as im always the 1 givin oral and bring in toys etc to spice things up but i get hardly any input on his ...
A. 20 June 2010: I agree with the other answer. I was in a relationship that I gave and gave and the guy was into internet porn and I even offered to do ALL that with him. But he just couldnt let himself get close for REAL. Only was satisfied with the internet. It ... (read in full...)
Are all men carrying sexual baggage like this?
Q. I have been together with him for about eight years now. For almost seven of those years I did not know how to have an orgasm through penetration alone because I was a virgin when we met and did not have sexual experience. We had to use my hands ...
A. 20 June 2010: This man IS A TOTAL JERK - the comments about you using your body parts not right, asian women, cheating, demands on what you do and keeping your eyes open? What are you his slave? Does he EVER try to just PLEASE U? Or does it ALWAYS have to end in ... (read in full...)
I feel like I'd be taking advantage of this older man if we got together!
Q. I'm 18 and I'm in a bit of a predicament, recently the man I've been seeing has told me that he has never been in love and he thinks he loves me, he has low self confidence despite being very very sexy and part of the reason we hooked up was because ...
A. 17 June 2010: The three things below say plenty - keep reading them and you will understand why you wrote to us...
1. Part of the reason we hooked up was because we both felt a bit low and were glad to have someone, anyway he has low self confidence ( need I s... (read in full...)
I feel like I'd be taking advantage of this older man if we got together!
Q. I'm 18 and I'm in a bit of a predicament, recently the man I've been seeing has told me that he has never been in love and he thinks he loves me, he has low self confidence despite being very very sexy and part of the reason we hooked up was because ...
A. 17 June 2010: Some of the signs of a controlling abusive man are :
1. Quickly tell u they are in love.
2. Making u responsible for their happiness
3. Isolating you from friends and family
there are more but I see these BIG RED FLAGS by what you have said.
... (read in full...)
My husband thinks I killed his mother by standing up for myself!
Q. I have reached the limit in associating with my in-laws. After 30 years of taking abuse from them, I have decided that I have had enough and I am no longer putting myself at their disposal to allow them to continue treating me badly. I have sp...
A. 16 June 2010: Wow! What U have gone thru sounds awful. I would say that you need to do what is best for you. Realize this, U may have not wanted anything to do with her BUT he is an adult and could have seen her ANYTIME he chose to.
Don't let him manipula... (read in full...)
Getting too close to a married friend helping me through my divorce - how do I stop these feelings?
Q. I have been married for almost 15 years. My marriage has never been great and I've FINALLY built up the strength to leave my husband. While parts of me love him, I have never, nor will I ever be IN LOVE with him. I have great friends who are ...
A. 15 June 2010: I think it would be wise that if you are getting advice from him to make sure your best friend ( his wife) is also near - or start spending more time with her. I am really suprised that he is buying you 'cheer-up' gifts - that seems odd. Good Luck - ... (read in full...)
Will I EVER find a decent partner and should I give up on these dating websites?
Q. I feel very down right now. I am in my mid thirties and feel like I am deluding myself that I will ever find a decent partner. I could write a book on the rubbish that I have encountered with men particularly in the last 5 years ago or so. I ...
A. 14 June 2010: I agree with you - STAY off the dating websites - I have found they seem to be a waste of time! Same experiences as u have had on them. Good luck - maybe take some time off from dating. There is an excellent book called 'Deal Breakers' that I ... (read in full...)
Does my ex still care? Why do I shake when I see him?
Q. i was seeing this boy on/off for 2 years, he was my first love...But all he ever done was sleep with other girls, lie and put me down sometimes, but he was still caring and treated me ok i guess. now its been a year and im over him, im now in a ...
A. 17 November 2009: I dont think it means that you 'Love' him still - it could make you so uncomfy that you shake. Or it could be that you shake because subconsciously you remember that he treated you badly but you thought it was 'ok' you guess.
Either way - I think ... (read in full...)
How do I keep myself from contacting him?
Q. Oh help me! He is at it again. How do I keep myself from any contact with him - I think I need to be hospitalized! He is texting me again this morning. About what they are doing and their jobs etc. I think it is a desperate attempt from him ...
A. 2 November 2009: Thanks again - I told him as of Nov 1st I did not want to hear from him at least until after holidays. and to please respect that.
He has both support and custody hearings for his girls in Nov and Dec and I want to know nothing of it and I dont w... (read in full...)
How do I keep myself from contacting him?
Q. Oh help me! He is at it again. How do I keep myself from any contact with him - I think I need to be hospitalized! He is texting me again this morning. About what they are doing and their jobs etc. I think it is a desperate attempt from him ...
A. 30 October 2009: Thanks to you who answered. The HIM is an xbf of 4 yrs. we broke up 6 months ago and he moved a woman into his house. She pays towards bills helps with his kids blah blah blah. I think he only txts because he is not happy. But he wont admit it. Or ... (read in full...)
Please suggest a solution to this! He knows I care about him, he must care about me too, if he keeps in touch, right?
Q. Here I go again. My x bf has been texting me he says we will be "forever friends" but he is living with a woman he met and started seeing when my mother was dying and I couldnt/wouldnt devote 100% of my time to him. He wants to meet up with me ...
A. 27 October 2009: Oh MY! Thanks to all of you who gave me advice!
It is true that I am broken inside. I ended a marriage with an emotionally abuse man after three children when they were old enough that I could get back 2 real work. Then my perfect job ended al... (read in full...)
Could there be legal consenquences for kids watching horror and inappropriate comedy movies?
Q. here is a weird question for the canadian agony uncles and aunts. my buddy shes got a 3 and half yr old son. she also has a 5 yr old daughter. they all love to sit down and watch, i know, this is a shocker! -house of 1000 corpses. amongst other ...
A. 11 October 2009: I have no idea about Canada but here in the US you would most definitely be subject to scrutiny for those movies for children that young as that age cannot understand the concept of 'fake' and the fact that the humor is inappropriate as in adult in ... (read in full...)
Why can't my heart understand what my head does?
Q. I cant get over this HELP! My bf starting seeing someone else when my mother was dying and I was out of town. I know I should not want to be with him and in my head I can see that he was using me and wasnt kind. But I miss the playfulness and sense ...
A. 11 October 2009: Thank you so much for your thoughts. He actually txtd me today to see if I could meet him when he left the house!
Then HE called me and proceeded to tell me about what THEY did last night and that he had to hurry cause THEY all had plans tonight!... (read in full...)
Met him online 6 weeks ago, he wanted to take it slow, didn't know what he wanted and I ended it because I couldnt be just friends. Did I do the right thing?
Q. Dear all, I met this guy online six weeks ago and it went well. We dated but only once a week. We'd call almost every day or every other day. Every time I am at his house we kiss and hug and touch each other but did not have sex. He never...
A. 11 September 2009: I think you are brave and strong and wonderful - not only to yourself but you were also with him.
My opinion is that it just wasnt a match and that he def has some issues with past relationships he was dragging into this.
You followed your gu... (read in full...)
I met a lovely man online, but he messaged my friend telling her he wasn't dating! What do I do?
Q. I meet this man online in July. We corresponded through e-mail for a month and then started dating the first week of August. We have been dating for a month now, a few times a week. I really like him and we always have a good time. We are at the ...
A. 7 September 2009: You can meet nothing good online. He lied. And yes you were lucky it was a friend that he messaged THIS time! I was foolish enough to date a guy who I met in real life who was on dating sites. Guess where he is now? After 4 years of me loving him... (read in full...)
Not even married yet and the sex is gone
Q. I'm sure this is a common problem but I need help, I am deeply in love with my fiance but I do not feel we are sexually compatible. I have all of the sexual energy in the world and he just doesn't, he's not into it and never has new ...
A. 5 September 2009: I would suggest that you do not make plans for the wedding until this is worked out! ... (read in full...)
What to do with ex and sex?
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up about 2 months ago. We had been together for almost 4 years. Right away he was with this woman he met on a dating site! All of our neighbors wanted to know what was going on! She started sleeping over just a few days ...
A. 2 July 2009: Thank you for the responses so far! I just am having a difficult time understanding all this. I cant see NOT being with him but the thought of being with him now makes me sick.
You are right no contact is best.
I will try to keep busy - I hav... (read in full...)
For him: oral sex while he watches porn. For me: 3 minutes, no kissing, no passion. Help!
Q. I live with a guy for almost a year we have had are share of troubles. At first he said he didnt love me but he has grow to love me but we never have sex maybe once a month but he always wants me to give him oral sex everyday while he watchs porn. ...
A. 2 July 2009: Dump him - I agree - he doesnt care about YOU at all you are a means to his end - his sex addiction to oral and porn.
You deserve to be treated better than that - The fact that there is no emotion is sad. He said he didnt love you.
How do ... (read in full...)
Why can she do things with others but not with me?
Q. my wife recently got drunk at a party we went to and let another man touch her boobs and take them out of her bra. all this things she has never allowed me to do even when she has got drunk when she is just with me. the lust which i could see in her ...
A. 25 June 2009: I think it is you that has no confidence! How did you two meet? Why did it take so long for her to give you a blow job as a wife when she did it for men in bars?
Something is missing. Did you ever have a great sex life? or has she always been thi... (read in full...)
He says if I don't sleep with him, he won't help with our children
Q. heres the story: about 5 months ago my live-in boyfriend of 5 years left me. He instantly had a gf (which leads me to believe he was seeing her before the break up, altho he denies it) anyway, we keep in touch bc we have to, as we have children ...
A. 22 June 2009: How many and what ages are the kids? Are they his kids? Is there a womanscenter near u? What part of the US do you live in? Unless you are in a very remote area most towns have help for someone in your situation.
I would not want a man like tha... (read in full...)
How could he love me and still be on dating sites?
Q. I just reunited with my ex. We broke up for about a month, during that month it was a back and forth deal, he would text me missing me terribly and vice versa. I can't say what my status is with him right now. He's been on dating sites while we were ...
A. 22 June 2009: Get rid of him and dont look back. I just went thru this with my xbf of 3 yrs. Even my therapist and friends said oh he is just looking. It destroyed my self-esteem, he never cared that it hurt me - he insisted that he loved me. Then my mom got... (read in full...)
I'm sick of being known as 'the slag'! Three months and they still won't drop it!
Q. this is really beginning to upset me now, in march i had a small get together with friends, 8 of my friends came over from college and we got a take away, had alot of alcohol and we danced and sang, it was a great night! when it came to half 1, 2 o ...
A. 21 June 2009: The more you try to defend yourself the longer the rumours will hang on.
Its best to just concentrate on your college, to still attend a party or two - where these two jerks will not be - and not to get drunk.
I applaud you for kicking him out ... (read in full...)
How do I just stop loving this man?!
Q. I have been seeing this man for about 3 yrs and he has lived with me for the past yr and a half he is bipolar and I and having troubles dealing with it I am always telling him im sorry for things that isnt my fault and always treating him as he ...
A. 21 June 2009: There are many kinds lof love. Sometimes we find ourselves with someone we 'love' but it not a healthy relationship.
We stay in it because we have a need to be needed or wanted or want to ease anothers pain.
But he doesnt seem to 'love' you ba... (read in full...)
What is keeping him from meeting me in person?!
Q. i am currently talking to a guy that i met from online chatting. after talking to him for about two weeks, i find out that his good friend knows my best friend at the university that my best friend attends. i like this guy's personality and the way ...
A. 21 June 2009: I agree - I have rarely found that online meetings are of any real benefit when it comes to dating.
If he hasnt wanted to meet you yet I would ask him what the hesitation is or suggest meeting up for a coffee or something.
A friend of mine s... (read in full...)
Why the midnight texts about unrelated issues?
Q. Can anyone pls help me try to figure this out? My ex who I broke up with just a couple of months ago is starting to send me texts again. Two weeks ago, I texted and tried to call him but never got a reply. The purpose of contacting him w...
A. 19 June 2009: I think everyone is right on with the answers to this one! My x kept pulling me back in with refusing to return my things. I just kept at him and ignored the other text this week. He did keep in going for a time I will admit and it was the same ... (read in full...)
Why cant I get over him?
Q. i broke up with him around december and to this day i still think of him all the time. i can't get over him. i cry all the time thinking about what we used to be and what i am now. why cant i get over him. he has a new girlfriend and he's happy. so ...
A. 17 June 2009: I am going thru the same thing but it has only been two months. From all I have talked to the best thing is to make a list of the good and bad things in the relationship. You may find that cathartic in that my list had many more negatives than ... (read in full...)
So confused by ex boyfriend's signals.
Q. Help! I have an exbf who keeps texting me to have sex. He is seeing someone else for the past month. I think he was cheating on me before. Anyway, he says he and this woman have just been kissing the whole month. It disgusts me that he is with ...
A. 17 June 2009: Thanks so much for the great advice so far! Wow Girly 123 you took alot of time to spell it all out for me.
Yeh, I guess it doesnt matter what else he has to say to me. There is no going back - he knows he lost a good woman.
It is best if I don... (read in full...)
Ex rings me while on vacation with new g/f
Q. hi all My ex is on holiday with his gf who is pregnent and last nite he rang me and he said are you missing me i repled kinda, but then i asked why he rang me and he said just seeing how you are then as we speak hes texting me. Does anyone think...
A. 13 June 2009: It very well could be control on his part. He is not near to keep an eye on you now that he is away with her. I know it sounds sick but sadly I have been through it not once but twice! He is sick and immature! He is gonna be a father, you are ... (read in full...)
Did I not communicate well enough for him?
Q. Hi, I had met a wonderful guy on line, he is a regional manger, used to travel a lot, finally we got the chance to meet for dinner, before the date he texted me what cuisine that I prefered and he offered to pick me up from my office after wor...
A. 9 June 2009: I think he is all about himself and has low self-esteem and doesnt care what you have to say. That is a big RED FLAG to me. I seriously dont think you can meet ANYONE on the internet and make it work or be safe. I tried. Disaster! Look for someone ... (read in full...)
Why do men not break up with you?
Q. You've helped in the past so here we go again. The NAVY man. I send him texts saying its over, then he reels me back in and i fall for it. Then he ignores my texts over and over again and reels me back in again. Today I told him he was a jerk, bu...
A. 8 June 2009: Oh my! I had just posted on why my x keeps texting me when he is seeing someone else. He too would reel me back in and my friends would get fed up with me.
I would say harsh things to him and break up he would ignore my hurt and then wait and pull... (read in full...)
My wife has doubled in size, I've lost interest in sex..do I leave her to get her to get in shape?
Q. When I proposed to my wife she was 5' and a perfect size zero. She had lovely long hair and walked like a graceful lady. Exactly my type. Now after 15 yrs of marriage she's a size 14-16 w/ short hair and walks like a chimp. Doubling her weight ...
A. 6 June 2009: I suggest that you see her as the lovely woman you married and treat her as such and I bet that she will want to lose the weight to please herself.
I just found out my boyfriend of 3 yrs was cheating on me. When I met him I weighed 125. Now I we... (read in full...)
He isn't there for me when I need him but I'm always there for him... what do I do?
Q. Please Help Me! I broke up with my bf two weeks ago after he asked me for money and said he wouldnt talk to me. My mother passed away a few days later. I didnt contact him to tell him because he has never been there when I needed him only when he ...
A. 16 May 2009: Thank you for the advice! When I read thru it it seems obvious but when I look out my window and can see his house and know his schedule it is tough. I keep wondering what is he doing now. His lites are on and he doesnt have his kids this weekend. I ... (read in full...)
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