A
male
age
41-50,
*isterquestion
writes:Hello all! So, I've been married to my wife for about 4 years now. Before we started dating, she was on a bit of a "wild streak" after her previous marriage ended. I'm completely ok with this and understand why. The thing is, I find myself turned on by imagining her with the guys she slept with during that time. I've even convinced her to tell me juicy stories, which I find extremely exciting. I realize that I'm in the minority because most men would not want to hear about their wife's previous lovers, so I know I'm a bit of a freak. My question is, would it be terrible of me to find and contact these guys and inquire about the possibility of trading stories? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2022): Yes ,it would be terribile.Terribly rude and invasive and indelicate.And could also get you a good punch on your nose - the fact that you are a bit of a freak does not mean that your wife' s past lovers are a bit of a freak too, in fact they could be very annoyed by your kind of freakness.
A
female
reader, QueenCupcake  +, writes (24 April 2022):
 I’m not sure that your wife will want to be reminded of her ‘wild streak’ for the sake of feeding your curiosity, and in the long run, it’s probably no good for you either…
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2022): A couple times I ran into an old girlfriend and her husband. The OGF was way too happy to see me; the husband and I felt awkward. ~he knows I had sex with her.. let's get out of here~.. ~he had sex with her, let's get out of here.~
Judy's old boyfriend and Judy's husband don't want to talk about fucking Judy.
Yes, it would be terrible. Have fun with her stories in the bedroom.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2022): My advice is simply dont . The reality of hearing stories and the fantasy is so much different. You may get turned on for a while . Then it may sicken you to think about what she did with others rather than you . Even if it was prior .
Every human has the jealousy streak .. we control it .. under certain factors .. but you are playing with fire . If your marriage is a happy one why ruin it because of this .
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (22 April 2022):
 Oh yeah, go ahead and do that - for your own gratification. That's not creepy at all. Not to mention, if you approach the wrong guy, you might get a good smack in the face. Actually, that might be the only good thing which could happen in this situation.
What does your wife think about you doing this? Have you discussed it with her or are you just running your sordid creepy little idea past us for a thrill?
"Freak" does not even begin to cover this.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2022): No good can come from that. If I were you I would find some good stories online and imagine it is your wife.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2022): Typo correction:
"What will make you want to behave, if you [knew] how naughty she used to be?"
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2022): Sir, we get these sorts of posts time and time again. Either husbands want to pimp-out their wives to other men like prostitutes; or they want to have live-porn shows in their bedrooms, featuring random male-performers. Have their wives sleep with other women, so-on and so-forth. Is being a cuckold a new trend??? Is that the reason why men get married now? To be directors, or stars, of their own homegrown amateur-porn?
What kind of marriage is that? Why even bother getting married? Why not just stay single, watch porn all day, attend orgies, or go to sex-parties? That's not what marriage is for; but it's exactly how you destroy one! Inviting things in that should stay out!!!
Oh well! It's your marriage, and you can do whatever you like with it. There's an ancient saying that "curiosity kills the cat!"
You can call me judgy, or self-righteous if you like. I'm human, and I bleed, feel pain, and have experienced a lot of what posters write about to DC. This is one issue I hope I never have to experience. I will not gamble with the love I've found. I might get bored, but I've set boundaries I will never cross with my partner. Life is too short, and love is too evasive and hard to keep; to throw it all away on any old random frivolous idea that enters my mind! With no concern or thought about the big picture, or all the possible ramifications. Talking dirty is one thing, but rehashing actual events is a news report.
Your past sex-life, and your wife's past sex-life, should fade-away into oblivion. A lot of men claim they get turned-on by that junk; then all of a sudden, they're looking at their wives or girlfriends differently. They'll lose respect for them, and/or develop retro-jealousy. They've opened a can of worms, and now they're beginning to feel discomfort or inadequate about their own sexual-performance. Wondering if she's just faking her pleasure or orgasms? Then he wants to know who the players were? When, where, and how?
Some guys even have the gall to become doubtful about the choice of partner that they've made...long after the fact!!! They decide they didn't like what they've heard after giving it some thought and consideration. Then what is she supposed to do? Undo the past??? If you possess a time machine, go ahead. Then you can rewind back to the time before you stuck your nose where it didn't belong. You can rewind to the point where you never met!
It's probably a big waste of time and words telling men this; but if you can get to one, that's a fairly decent accomplishment. Love is not something to be taken for granted, toyed with, or to be exploited. If you take someone at face-value, or forgive their past; you don't turnaround and go digging in it.
You've already judged her, because you've described her past as a "wild streak." That's not a complimentary term. Why can't it just be a past like anybody else's? "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone!" Unfortunately, the world is populated with hypocrites. Life is full of double-standards. Things that could affect someone in a dire way, should be shared before marriage. You should only share the edited version of your past love-life, with your spouse. Keep to yourself what you didn't tell each-other before the wedding; unless you have secret children, you're bisexual, or you're a hitman.
How would she know if this isn't a set-up just to get a full confession of her past, so you can use it as leverage against her, or to force her to do things she doesn't want to do?
The thought processes behind this kind of thinking isn't always beneficial for the wife or girlfriend. Simply because sometimes their husband, or boyfriend, is just trying to see just how bad her past actually was?!! Maybe he's only seeking permission to venture outside the marriage; or attempting to introduce things he knows she wouldn't agree to.
You didn't ask her to share all her juicy stories before you married her; so now, four years later you want to hear some nasty little stories to get your jollies. May I suggest you just go watch some porn, and satisfy your need for those kind of "juicy stories?"
You see, there's a big difference in the outcome. The actors or characters portrayed in videos don't share your life. They don't have to look you in the eyes. They won't be mistreated; or called filthy names when you're in an angry rage. You might be temped to use her "wild streak" as your convenient excuse, or defense, when you decide to dip outside your marriage. After all, you forgave her; so she has no choice but to forgive you! Right?!! What will make you want to behave, if you new how naughty she used to be?
Human nature is inherently dark, unpredictable, and unfair. People break their promises, even after swearing on the life of their mothers! Even worse, they blaspheme by swearing to God! What guarantees will she receive in exchange for revealing things that you may unexpectedly find appalling??? What guarantees are there those juicy stories won't come flying back in her face???
We all have skeletons or misdeeds we've come to terms with with in our past. We've moved on, and started over. The objective is to leave it all behind, and never to repeat those mistakes. To never have to relive them. No triggers or flashbacks.
People (you, me, and everyone reading this) finally attempt to settle-down, and recover from bad moments in their lives. Times when we may have acted out of character; due to pain, or distress. You want to kill and bury those demons, not revive them!
Once a person has rehabilitated themselves and atoned for their sins; they are attempting to escape the ravages of their old self-destructive behavior or bad-habits. They've found themselves again!
If you ask me, nothing is more evil and insidious; than for someone to come along and force them back into that dark place again. It may be just fine for your entertainment; but shameful or painful for her to recall. Even if she agrees to do it to please you. Your selfishness will dismiss how it affects her; because you want something to get hard to.
Later to sour, and the stories become poisonous to your pride or male-ego.
Maybe she got married and thought things have changed for the better. Maybe she thinks you were the one guy in her life who rescued her from the darkside. Maybe she thinks she has finally found happiness and contentment. I guess maybe not.
Once you squeeze that toothpaste out of the tube, there is no putting it back, my friend. I don't wanna know who or what my partner used to do; and I ain't digging-up no old skeletons that I buried back in the day. Love and life is just the way we want it to be.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (21 April 2022):
 Eww no, your wife is not your personal porn actor and you do not go contact her previous lovers to hear the juicy details.
If she is OK with sharing them, THAT is all you get, HER version.
Have a little respect for your wife.
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