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female
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*izabeth
writes: i don't know what to do, i broke up with my ex nearly 9 months ago and since him i've come across some really nice guys but i just don't fancy them. i'm still totally hung over my ex. my ex was my best friend aswel, but my friends have told me to get in contact with him just as friends to see how hes doing but i don't know whether it will bring back all of the feelings and emotions. i don't know if he will want to hear from me. what do i do?
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female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (3 May 2006):
 You cannot read this guys mind, but a lot depends on why you two broke up in the first place. Who instigated the breakup? You or him. Then take it from there, drop him a note or send a text.
A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (3 May 2006):
 Well I think it does carry that risk but on the other hand in alot of ways the old feelings and emotions are still there already. Without knowing the circumstances of your break-up its impossible to know if he will be pleased to hear from you or not.
I think the one thing I would say here is be prepared; you havent moved on but he may have, he also may not have but I think that this is something you have to go into with open eyes. Like your friends said, keep the conversation light and social and feel your way through it from there. Hope that helps, take care.
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A
female
reader, Anja +, writes (3 May 2006):
 When you have been close to someone and split up it is best to stay clear from being friends...at least until you know you have no emotional ties there still. Sounds like you have. It takes each individual different amounts of time to get over a relationship. Don't think about the time...you will be ready when you are ready, go out and enjoy being single. The relationship broke up for a reason. Personally I think it is not worth being friendly with an ex, all the feelings WILL come back, and past hurts will open up again. You will be putting yourself in a very vulnerable position. He more then likely has moved on. I suggest you do the same...enjoy life..look ahead...never back, you don't need to be with someone to feel good about yourself!! xx
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